Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Mary Worth 946

The first step is to recognize there's a problem...

The Twelve Steps

1. We admitted we were powerless over our cell phones — that our lives had become unmanageable. We even ate corn bread muffins in our rooms.

2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves (Mary Worth) could restore us to sanity.

3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of Mary Worth as we understood Her.

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. We asked Mary if we got it right.

5. Admitted to Mary, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs: "We like to send text messages."

6. Were entirely ready to have Mary Worth remove these defects of character. And take away our texting machines.

7. Humbly asked Mary to point out our shortcomings.

8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all. Especially dear old dad.

9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others (i.e., We did not text our amends while driving).

10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it. Before Mary could point it out to us.

11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of Mary Worth's will for us and the power to carry that out.

12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to others, (which was not difficult since we could easily text the message).

Today's Full Strip

20 comments:

  1. Great one, Wanders.

    But I still can't see this story line as being any less boring than the last twenty seven.

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  2. But finally, the plot of the next never-ending story in the Worthiverse! This may really explode - is Santa Royale an enclave of electronic device abusers, not unlike the little towns throughout the country that harbor meth labs??? Do we dare even consider the possibility of an intervention, with Mary at the helm?? Come on gang, let's rustle up some excitement here!!!!

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  3. Yes, the only thing I could think this morning was INTERVENTION!!! Although, we'll certainly have to wait a week or two or ten until it happens. Nonetheless, I'm on the edge of my seat - as usual!

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  4. Holy Cow. This is one of the best Worth-izings I've seen in awhile. Maybe ever. Go Wanders!

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  5. I see. This storyline will be about Dawn's addiction to technology. All of last week was to show us that Mary is NOT addicted to technology, making her the one person who can help Dawn. As if we would suspect anyone else.

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  6. Step 13: Relapse, Recharge, Re-Download Fart-App

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  7. Is that a mirror? or did Wilbur install his satellite dish in the dining room??

    This road to technology addiction starts innocently enough... a little tweet here, a FB status update there, maybe a few "pages" read on a kindle e-reader... before you know it you're hooked! HOOKED, I say!! You no longer want to talk to dear old tubby dad or eat wonder bread sandwiches in the dining room with a satellite dish!

    I'm SO relieved Mary has remained pure and untainted by this horrible modern mayhem!

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  8. I'll admit that sometimes, my family waits at the dinner table while I finish typing an important comment on Mary Worth and Me.

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  9. Do we know for sure that Dr Buzzy Feeling and Miss Backwards Reflection ended up together? Maybe Dawn could go see the doc and be cured a la Bonnie Bonnie Johnson AND get a boyfriend out of the deal.

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  10. What is that thing anyway, a pocket pager? Does she leavem essages for people at random, just to be "paged" like a real grown up? You're right, Dawn, save it for the bedroom.

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  11. Maybe Dawn could show me how to reset the digital clock in my car?

    But the real issue here isn't about technology, it's about Wilbur's wussy parenting. Either he lays down the rules about no texting--either in the car or at the dinner table--or else kicks his adult daughter out of his condo so she can text and eat wherever she wants.

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  12. Dawn rushed from "keeping up" to "hooked" in one day's strip. Good one, Moy.

    I think I've figured out the source of Moy's stories: she pulls them from "Dear Abby" letters.

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  13. Dear Abby is much more sophisticated, not to mention, interesting.

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  14. Remember Vicki: "objects in Mirror appear closer than they are."

    What you see in the mirror is a painfully large close-up of Wilbur's comb-over.

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  15. Actually, Scurvy, I think she's hooked on the garage door opener. "Door up, door down. Door up, door down." Dawn never was the sharpest tool in the shed.

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  16. Thank you Mary Worth, for pointing out to us the Evils Of Modern Technology. First it was online ordering with B?BJ?. Now it is the mind-sapping power of *Kindle*, where not even *dinner* (consisting entirely of grey-coloured salmon squares) is sacred!

    Oh, what a tangled interwebs we weave...

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  17. Of course all this modern technology is bad.

    If bad means attention is not being paid to Mary, who "knows herself" (as we were reminded several times during the previous, and not brief enough, e-book 'story arc.'

    And who also knows every other character in Santa Royale. Northern or Southern. Or Eastern? Western too?

    Anyway. Cell phones, pagers, e-books, computers, all off!

    Attention must be paid.

    To Mary!

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  18. That's right katyb because,as Wanders pointed out, Mary IS the higher power.

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Don't be shy! I'd love to hear what you have to say about Mary Worth. Just keep it clean, that's all I ask. This is a FAMILY FRIENDLY blog. I don't want to moderate comments, but I will if I have to.