The chastened Nola is as bad as the repentant Jill Black. All of the interesting women in the Worthiverse always get their comeuppance - boo hiss!
Mary's taste in art certainly leaves something to be desired. Shrubbery and an outhouse? Maybe Mary can further her education also. Does Santa Royale Community College offer a course in art appreciation? (If so, let's hope that Toby is not the instructor!)
Nola should look into becoming a dental technician. As Wanders has pointed out, she seems comfortable with sticking her hand into Mary's mouth to adjust her dentures.
After Nola leaves I'm afraid that Mary, in a manic state from self-proclaimed successful meddling, will start baking a casserole for some (un)lucky neighbor . . .
Mary Worth, local yenta, busybody, meddler and advice-giver, has been informed that her suit versus Hobo has been scheduled for review by the Supreme Court. Worth, who believes herself to be the world's foremost authority on how other people should live their lives, has been engaged in a long standing legal fight over her right to solve problems for the people of Santa Royale.
Worth's standing was unchallenged until Nola Wolvenson, a local entrepreneur, found answers to her moral quandary after a chance encounter with a man known only as "Hobo". Worth was disturbed to learn of Wolvenson's "salvation sans Mary", but only took legal action when "Hobo" also involved himself in the televangelist Johnny Thomas' fall from grace. Accounts vary, but apparently Hobo was able to rescue Thomas from a life of sin by merely asking him if he was okay. This brief intervention stands in stark contrast to Worth's heavily personal, lengthy lectures to people in distress, and bodes ill for busybodies in general, not just Mary Worth.
In her filing for court consideration, Worth lays out her career achievements over the past 80 years, giving extensive details about the problems she has solved, and including very juicy details of those she has helped. "It stands to reason that a thieving, lying adulteress like Nola Wolvenson could not be cured by merely encountering a filthy, stinking, lazy, ill-kempt, jobless, homeless, sketchy, foul-breathed, weird-beard like Mr. so-called Hobo. Mary Worth, an immaculate, well-bred, bustling, polite, good-cooking, problem-solving wealthy widow, has devoted her life to managing other people's lives. Mr. "Hobo's" encroachment on Mrs. Worth's territory is obviously illegal, illicit, malign, unwarranted, prohibited, shady, proscribed, and just plain unfair."
When told of the latest developments, Mr. Hobo said, "I hope everything's okay."
Journalists covering the Supreme Court have issued a few bulletins describing what they have overheard coming from the deliberations chamber:
Don't worry, Wanders, no "non-family friendly" stuff from me.
My brain and imagination has been so utterly beaten down by the inanity of this story line, that I couldn't think of anything even faintly obscene to write. Nor anything even faintly clever.
Oh, Mary. You have unwittingly created a monster here. No, not because of Nona's big hands, but because she's turned into another Rampant Do-Gooder. You are either about to be A)out of the busybody business or B)responsible for a Dr. Jeff Temptation.
Aren't they going to tie in the sleazy television preacher somehow? We endured a week of talking about that guy. When will they reveal that he's Nola's boyfriend?
Only you, Nola, can decide what's right for you?!?! Isn't that her whole problem, that she knew what was right for her and she got it? I am very confused about what to take away from this story.
Don't be shy! I'd love to hear what you have to say about Mary Worth. Just keep it clean, that's all I ask. This is a FAMILY FRIENDLY blog. I don't want to moderate comments, but I will if I have to.
"Here, Mary, your dentures are slipping. Let me adjust them for you."
Careful everyone. For some reason, I'm feeling that I just need to remind everyone that we are a family friendly blog.
ReplyDelete?!
ReplyDeleteThe chastened Nola is as bad as the repentant Jill Black. All of the interesting women in the Worthiverse always get their comeuppance - boo hiss!
ReplyDeleteMary's taste in art certainly leaves something to be desired. Shrubbery and an outhouse? Maybe Mary can further her education also. Does Santa Royale Community College offer a course in art appreciation? (If so, let's hope that Toby is not the instructor!)
Nola should look into becoming a dental technician. As Wanders has pointed out, she seems comfortable with sticking her hand into Mary's mouth to adjust her dentures.
ReplyDeleteOr maybe she could be a hand model...
Wait wait Mary - don't you mean, "Only I can decide what's right for you, Nola!"!!
ReplyDeleteSo wait, Nola's *not* going to jail? Seriously?
ReplyDeleteEither Moy has severely underestimated her regular readers, or I have severely overestimated them.
- spencer
After Nola leaves I'm afraid that Mary, in a manic state from self-proclaimed successful meddling, will start baking a casserole for some (un)lucky neighbor . . .
ReplyDeleteWorth v Hobo to go Before Supreme Court
ReplyDeleteMary Worth, local yenta, busybody, meddler and advice-giver, has been informed that her suit versus Hobo has been scheduled for review by the Supreme Court. Worth, who believes herself to be the world's foremost authority on how other people should live their lives, has been engaged in a long standing legal fight over her right to solve problems for the people of Santa Royale.
Worth's standing was unchallenged until Nola Wolvenson, a local entrepreneur, found answers to her moral quandary after a chance encounter with a man known only as "Hobo". Worth was disturbed to learn of Wolvenson's "salvation sans Mary", but only took legal action when "Hobo" also involved himself in the televangelist Johnny Thomas' fall from grace. Accounts vary, but apparently Hobo was able to rescue Thomas from a life of sin by merely asking him if he was okay. This brief intervention stands in stark contrast to Worth's heavily personal, lengthy lectures to people in distress, and bodes ill for busybodies in general, not just Mary Worth.
In her filing for court consideration, Worth lays out her career achievements over the past 80 years, giving extensive details about the problems she has solved, and including very juicy details of those she has helped. "It stands to reason that a thieving, lying adulteress like Nola Wolvenson could not be cured by merely encountering a filthy, stinking, lazy, ill-kempt, jobless, homeless, sketchy, foul-breathed, weird-beard like Mr. so-called Hobo. Mary Worth, an immaculate, well-bred, bustling, polite, good-cooking, problem-solving wealthy widow, has devoted her life to managing other people's lives. Mr. "Hobo's" encroachment on Mrs. Worth's territory is obviously illegal, illicit, malign, unwarranted, prohibited, shady, proscribed, and just plain unfair."
When told of the latest developments, Mr. Hobo said, "I hope everything's okay."
Journalists covering the Supreme Court have issued a few bulletins describing what they have overheard coming from the deliberations chamber:
Scalia: hahaha Thomas: Sotomayor: hahaha Roberts: calm down, everyone
Ginsburg: Yenta? Seriously, yenta?
Does Nola even have a boyfriend?
ReplyDeleteI think what happens next is that Nola and the oft-rejected Dr. Jeff will get married and go to Cambodia or wherever it is that he has his clinic.
Mary will go have a little "talk" with the hobo guru so he doesn't step on her turf again. The police will be involved.
Moe will show us none of this. Instead, we'll be treated to scenes of Wilbur eating another ham sandwich and doing nothing in partuclar.
You know what they say about women with big hands, don't you?
ReplyDeleteYup, big gloves.
Don't worry, Wanders, no "non-family friendly" stuff from me.
ReplyDeleteMy brain and imagination has been so utterly beaten down by the inanity of this story line, that I couldn't think of anything even faintly obscene to write. Nor anything even faintly clever.
Oh, Mary. You have unwittingly created a monster here. No, not because of Nona's big hands, but because she's turned into another Rampant Do-Gooder. You are either about to be A)out of the busybody business or B)responsible for a Dr. Jeff Temptation.
ReplyDeleteWHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!
Aren't they going to tie in the sleazy television preacher somehow? We endured a week of talking about that guy. When will they reveal that he's Nola's boyfriend?
ReplyDeletemeg @ 11:14 AM, I'm looking forward to Nina Totenberg's coverage of those Supreme Court hearings.
ReplyDelete@ Nance--who said that's Nola's hand? You've seen the drawing perspective on this strip before. Mary can easily twist her wrist backward like that.
ReplyDeleteOnly you, Nola, can decide what's right for you?!?! Isn't that her whole problem, that she knew what was right for her and she got it? I am very confused about what to take away from this story.
ReplyDeleteKitKat@ 12:59- Sorry, Santa Royale doesn't get NPR- the local station KSRY has a special correspondent at the Supreme Court, Tina Nothinberg.
ReplyDeleteMary is biting her nails.
ReplyDeletemeg @11:14
ReplyDelete(catching up 12 hours later!)
or maybe...
Scalia: hahaha Thomas: zzzzzzz
Sotomayor: hahaha Roberts: calm down, everyone
Ginsburg: Yenta? Seriously, yenta?