Thursday, May 31, 2012

Mary Worth 1,313

It's a little too early to be asking that, Wilbur. Give it another month. Trust me. I'm the voice of experience.

Today's Full Strip

29 comments:

  1. Life is brutal, Dawn. But at least your malaise has helped Wilbur put down the sandwich, change into more mature clothing, and fluff his chest hair.

    Dawn, however, has replaced her laptop with an orange pillow-goiter.

    She should switch channels to What Not to Wear. Clinton would make her throw out that rank purple Pajama Snuggie! (Talk about brutal!)

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  2. One more thing -- exactly what was Dawn's relationship with Dave? We have no flashbacks, no scenes of warm, fuzzy feelings. Who is this guy?

    Perhaps Dawn should watch Dr. Phil's episode on Chronic Depression.

    Or -- Wilbur should step up as a parent (and advice columnist!) and shake some sense into his daughter.

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  3. OK. "Game of Thrones" for days, same clothes, same fetal knot, (presumably) unwashed hair....you have got to be supremely clueless advice columnist not to suspect clinical depression.

    This has gone beyond the curative scope of kites and Mary's advice, I fear.

    Or maybe it's the sinister work of Evil Teddy.

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  4. Pool party. Dawn meets a new guy. Dawn is happy again. Next story.

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  5. That sofa is way too close to the TV. Is Dawn's depression affecting her vision too?

    Does anyone remember the alias of Wilbur's advice column? Seems to me it was "Dear [woman's name]." I keep thinking of "Aunt Blabby," but that was one of Johnny Carson's characters, not someone from the Worthiverse.

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  6. Hey, Dawn! Why not switch off the TV and get back online for some medieval-themed RPGs? You're certain to meet the Virtual Man Of Your Dreams there.

    Why doesn't Dawn have a job? MW needs to have a chat with Wilbur re: his Parenting Skills.

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  7. Considering that Dave was, in reality, no more than a casual acquaintance who said "Hi" when he saw her, the only solution for Dawn is that she reenter the worm hole that is the Matrix.

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  8. @KitKat 9:32 AM - The name of Wilbur's column is "Ask Wendy", according to Google searches I tried. Sounds right to me.

    "After several days", I am starting to become depressed at how slowly this storyline is progressing, especially after the comparative whirlwind pace of Gina's wedding.

    Is it me, or is it becoming increasingly difficult to prove I am not a robot? (I failed the last two attempts!)

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  9. @Thorpnotized at 10:11 AM, thank you! We haven't seen Wilbur/Wendy working on his/her column in ages. Maybe it got canned. (If that's the case, who's paying for those sandwiches?)

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  10. I thought Dave would shoplift a tomato or something at the store - where is the crime? We've had identity theft, wallet snatching, fraud, public intoxication, kidnapping, etc. Don't tell me Santa Royale is now been clensed of crime single-handedly by Mary.

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  11. @Thorpnotized at 10:11 I fear that this storyline is going to turn into one of those Mary Worth PSA's. Like what to do when your wallet is stolen, only this time it will be what to do when your loved one is clinically depressed.

    Before we get to that, I'd love to see Wilbur try a similar solution to the kite flying. Since she won't get off the couch, eject the GoT DVD, and pop in the first two seasons of "Community". Maybe, if Dawn has a vestigial sense of humor, she'll laugh, and then she might go back to College in search of a sweet, geeky guy instead o a golden god.

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  12. Life can't be too brutal in Game of Thrones if the knight on screen is riding in such genteel fashion. If the hands were a bit closer together it would be a lovely equitation ride suitable for the show ring.
    Parenting is not for the faint of heart, Wilbur. Repeat after me - "Not on my watch!" Do something, for goodness' sake.

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  13. Dawn is so unappealing that, for all I care, she can stay on that couch until she grows into it. I suspect Wilbur feels the same way...

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  14. Does Moy expect us to feel compassion for this person?

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  15. This storyline must be about Depression. How depressing *sigh*

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  16. What IS that control panel Wilbur is about to sit at to call long-distance? Seriously, he wouldn't need anything that elaborate if he were going to call Mars.

    I'm glad I'm not the only one who's having trouble proving I'm not a robot. I often don't even try to comment because it takes several attempts.

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  17. n[Monday] Oh my! Wilbur has the stylish Windsor Chair desktop, with the optional wicker back. We don't have those in my area yet.

    So, as to the long-distance call, is he going to contact Dawn's mother, perhaps? Does Dawn have a mother? I'm really vague about Dawn's origin story. I think she showed up on Wilbur's doorstep one day as a pudgy teenager with glasses. Help an old lady out--does anyone remember?

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  18. [FRIDAY] - This is the third day this week where Dawn repeats her new mantra, "Life is brutal." (She should have that phrase printed on a t-shirt.) At first I wondered what that thing is hanging on the door next to Wilbur, until I realized it's supposed to be his hand.

    For me, today's second panel is awesome, but I'm not really sure why...

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  19. Friday...Wilbur's going to make a long-distance call! This situation is much more serious than we thought.

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  20. Wilbur dials the mysterious long distance number. He hears "life is brutal" and makes a sandwich.

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  21. Quick, tell Captain Kirk that Wilbur Weston has stolen his chair!

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  22. Oh please, please, please, let Wilbur's long distance call be to Kurt! That way, we can get an update on his life since returning to his dismal hovel and pregnant wife. Little Wilbur or Abby must be about a year old, by now. Who better to cheer up Dawn, than her Not Really Brother?

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  23. A long distance call? Mary Worth suddenly had a twinge in her condo and suspects a neighbor is trying to get advice from someone who is NOT Mary Worth. You don't want to get Mary angry......

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  24. Robert is right. Wilbur must be calling Mary. Little does Wilbur know that Mary already knows EVERYTHING. Mary has been disguised as Lucifer the Evil Teddy Bear the whole time.

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  25. fauxprof, I also thought that wilbur may be ready to call Dawn's mother!

    Does anyone know about her? Maybe she's hiding with Gina's father in the wit-less protection program.

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  26. I'm missing something. How did we know this is "Game of Thrones"? The day this interminable plot began, I scoured the strip but didn't see the reference that clearly everyone else saw. *blush*

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  27. May 28 strip
    Dawn: "Dad, can't you see I'm busy watching 'Game of Thrones'?"

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  28. Saturday...Oh, awesome, Wilbur's going to have Dave whacked!!

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  29. Robert: Oh -- I must not have seen the strip that day. Thank you!!

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