Thursday, June 13, 2013

Mary Worth 1,614

You know what would be awesome right now? If Hospital Hi-Fi started to play "Cats in the Cradle" by Harry Chapin.

Today's Full Strip

41 comments:

  1. "No! No! No! I ordered pudding, and they brought me gelatin!"

    I wonder if Mary is hiding behind those drapes, a la Polonius, smugly satisfied that her meddling has prompted Elinor to go from a lifetime of crabbiness to heartfelt remorse at warp speed. Talk about turning on a dime...

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  2. Folks, we frequently berate old Joe for phoning it in, so we ought to give him credit when he knocks it out of the park as he does today...TWICE! Just imagine what this strip could be like if he drew like this every day. Of course, you'd still need to get a different writer. Let's see, Nabokov and Vonnegut are both dead. I know: how about Seth MacFarlane!

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  3. Wow! I knew Uncle Joe used to illustrate superhero comics, but he's into "Tales of the Crypt" territory today.

    Can't top KitKat's Shakespearean allusion, but Elinor looks somewhat Dickensian--like she's just had a visit from the ghost of Christmas Yet To Come.


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  4. Tales of the Crypt or Tales of the Boiler Room.

    JG has to be out of India ink after today's strip.

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  5. Fabulous image! I feel a tee-shirt coming on.....

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  6. Oh, please. Elinor doesn't strike me as the kind of person who would admit to herself that she's a "bitter creature". I think she would just consider this a bad dream caused by the lousy hospital food.

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  7. Ahem! This was a FAKE HEART ATTACK!
    I mean, seriously, I want to be a team player, but... but... but...

    Pardon me, I'm just going to go over there and cry now.

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  8. But, yeah, the artwork is way cool today. Get better, Elinor!

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  9. Is Skelinor in the coal mine wing of the hospital or is this a horribly racist panel? As a clown, often depicted in bad Charterstone bored housewife art, I'm offended.

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  10. Where have I seen this plot line before? Hmmm.

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  11. Comments today are really great!

    I wholeheartedly agree with @KitKat and @Thorpnotized, though. Hair-helmeted Elinor/Skelinor is too narcissistic to have such a quick moment of insight. It's got to be the pudding/gelatin travesty. I've often felt the same horror myself...

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  12. If you look closely at the right side of Elinor's neck, you will see a tattoo of a man's name. I have my own idea of what the name is. Does anyone else see it, or am I crazy? (The answer to the second question is 'yes', so don't be distracted.)

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  13. May be a word(s), not necessarily a name...

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  14. ...a bitter, ink-stained creature....

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  15. @heydave at 9:59 - Did Elinor fake a heart attack, or suffer a self-fulfilling prophecy? I kind of hope it's the latter. If Dr. Jeff and his cronies can't tell the difference, that's really sad.

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  16. I have to agree, the drawing is done quite well in this one. Maybe now Moy will actually step up and produce quality writing?


    ... Nah...

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  17. The name/word on Elinor's neck appears to be either "Luis" or "LTUS." If the former, well, what is the first name of Mr. Kinley? If the latter, perhaps Elinor has a past that has not been revealed. If she was a lieutenant in the US (insert name of service here), then did she serve as a woman, or as a man, baby?

    What a backstory this old biddie may have! And it would explain the random facial hair she seems to sport from time to time...

    "I always knew I was different from the other boys. Mother named me Elvis, but the guys used to call me Elly... When I was sent to 'Nam, I found myself strangely fascinated by the native dress. I bought myself an ao dai on my first shore leave. And after that I pretty much wore it all the time. As long as I could shoulder a rifle and scramble through the tall grass, my commander didn't much care...And the other men in my squad said I reminded them of their hometown sweethearts, only not quite so pretty..."

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  18. My child snuck out the other day
    To be with a "bachelor" I thought was gay
    I had an idea to make them pay
    A heart attack fake in every way

    But after a visit, I dreamt that as she grew
    They'd say "She sure is a lot like you, death.
    Your Beth, she sure is a lot like you."

    And the bat with the ladle serving clumps of food
    Came to hospital to tell me I'm rude.
    "May I tell you what I think" She did anyway.
    "Blah blah, blah de blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Beth is torn blah blah."

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  19. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  20. Mary will be in a hospital bed soon too - for breaking her arm trying to pat herself on the back.

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  21. Hey you guys!

    http://mentalfloss.com/article/51010/4-comic-strips-totally-reinvented-themselves

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  22. Hey heydave,

    Elinor was *considering* faking a heart attack but actually *had* a heart attack... or stroke. Same diff.

    Consider it kind of like "The Boy Who Cried Wolf" but in reverse.

    Remember the drops of sweat on Elinor's forehead before she collapsed? Remember then non-drops of sweat on her forehead before she faked a collapse? That.

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  23. Thanks to Teacher Patti for the link.
    I agree with Wally. She had a real heart attack, brought on by her own angry and bitter tension. If faking, she would have found a chair to collapse in. Falling on the floor would be too risky.

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  24. The artwork is good, but really, Mary hardly meddled! Or is she able to invade people's dreams now?

    --Beagle Vet

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  25. FRIDAY

    TomHarpman has aged considerably since we last saw him, and with the gravitas of this process has come a brown suit.

    But, what the heck does their dialogue even MEAN? Seriously, I have no freaking clue. What a lot of baloney.

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  26. No wonder Beth is crying - the shoulder harness is cutting into her neck. Ouch!

    Well, the stage is set for a tearful scene in Elinor's hospital room. I can't get the scene from "A Muppet Family Christmas" with Fozzie Bear and his mother out of my mind. Picture this:

    Mother Bear/Elinor: "Son!"

    Fozzie/Tom: "Ma!"

    Both of them: "Waa-ahhh wokka wokka!!"

    Mary will step from behind the drapes, smile beatifically, and smirk at another meddling victory. Have the Kaopectate at hand on Sunday, people.

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  27. I'm wondering if we will be treated to another portrayal of the dream sequence in Summary Sunday's strip this weekend.

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  28. Bravo, Mike!

    Beagle Vet -- this is Mary we're talking about. She doesn't just invade dreams. She controls them.

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  29. Pink car! No wonder Tom is a workaholic: he is a Mary Kay salesperson.

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  30. That is one cheesy grin on TomDearHoney's face today! Methinks he is up to something no good!

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  31. Mike, I love your song! The bat with the ladle serving clumps of food... LOL!

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  32. SATURDAY

    Look out, Elinor! TomHarpman is sporting his Manly Chest Hair today.

    And Beth's extra finger is back in Panel Two. Elinor should just lie back in her Bed O' Soot and give up.

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  33. "Horrified Elinor" stands out as Uncle Joe's best work, and has got to be a contender for Panel of the Year. It's a shame that tombeth will find her all reformed and cuddly and remorseful when they enter her room. She will be shorn of all the magnificent rage that made her such a joy for Giella to draw. He probably hasn't had so much fun since his days of depicting comic book villains.

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  34. So, Tom is in sales. This formerly lonely workaholic sickly bachelor is going to have it easy now that Mary softened up Elinor for the big pitch. What a let down.
    My wv is admitu perfect. Oh yeah, Mary, that one is for you.

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  35. "I want to talk to your mother...I can win her over...I don't care how long it takes."

    Obviously Tom is hoping to sell her some life insurance. Once Mrs. Kinley writes that check to Santa Royale Life and Casualty, Harpman will be out the door in a shot, looking for his next sale.
    "See ya, Beth dear, gotta go."

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  36. Tom Harpman suddenly looks like a young,blonde Christopher Walken.

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  37. SUNDAY

    Oh, brother. So that's it? TomHarpman tells Elinor he will take care of her and casually mentions that he wants to marry Beth. Elinor, whose Scrooge-like epiphany has completely rendered her boring, extends her best wishes. The End.

    What a lot of bull****. We can only hope that the Ex-Mrs. TomHarpman enters the plot, exclaims that they were never legally divorced, and seeks to ruin their happiness. Then Elinor can evoke her Inner *itch and get things rolling.

    PS--Word Ver is "false". You said it.

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  38. A fake heart attack, a visit from Mary, one bad dream -- and now she's all "I love asparagus"?

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