When I decided to propose to my wife and surprise her with an engagement ring (we had had a few discussions so I knew what she wanted), I did a lot of research and selected a jewelry store outside of Cincinnati where we were both graduate students. On the way to the jewelers, my car broke down along the freeway during a freezing cold January rush hour. A nice man with a car phone stopped and let me use his phone to call a tow truck. The tow truck came and hauled my car away, leaving me to wander down the embankment to a gas station with a pay phone. As I wandered, I thought to myself, "I need someone to come pick me up? Who should I call?" Then it dawned on me: I have a girl friend! I'd never had to rely on her in a crisis before, and it was this really new and novel feeling. When I called and explained that I was stranded (I didn't tell her I was going to pick out her a ring), she was happy to come get me. Happy to. Since then, I've always thought that the measure of a relationship is how you work together in times of distress.
Mary and Jeff, your relationship has thus been measured.
Jeff: "Vietnam was no bed of roses for me. The WiFi at Peace Village is so unstable!"
ReplyDeleteMary: "Jeff, have you ever thought about wearing a yellow toupee?"
Have you noticed the outfits Mary wears when out on the boat with Jeff? The last time they were on the boat is was a suit, today it's a turtleneck!
ReplyDeleteWeren't they supposed to dine at their favorite restaurant (What's it called? The Posterior Punt? The Derriere Dory? The Can Canoe? The Tushy Trawler? Something like that.) prior to this sunset cruise? Were the words "How was your trip?" never uttered during dinner? Apparently Jeff just went on and on about how hot it was in 'Nam.
ReplyDelete@Yahoonski at 8:52 a.m., on Wednesday Jeff said, "How about a sunset cruise, then dinner at the Bum Boat?" He's hoping Mary will become seasick and thus eat very little at that fine establishment, e.g., "Uh, just water for me, thanks!"
ReplyDeleteForgetting any other details Harlot Mary?
ReplyDelete"Oh, and I bought my dear friend Shelly Cohen a purse at Lord & Taylor that was 80% off!
ReplyDelete"I got mugged in Central Park, and almost run over by a taxi, and had a platonic affair with a dashing Broadway Legend, which wasn't cheating because it was, y'know, platonic, just like our relationship...which I guess makes it cheating. Soooooo...how was Vietnam?"
ReplyDeleteJeff: You think that's bad? I lost my Viet Nam Clinic folder! And then, I ran out of sunscreen. Whew! Talk about rough times.
ReplyDelete@Yahoonski at 8:52 AM: Re their favorite restaurant...didn't just lol, but just about bellowed out loud...too funny!!!
ReplyDeleteI'm having a daydream of this lovely cruise ending abruptly as a Great White shark takes a chomp on the vessel sending the boat to its watery resting place at the bottom of the ocean. Mary's gas bag of a head would be bobbing in the waves...
ReplyDeleteTo be fair, Mary has always turned down Jeff's proposals (IIRC). But still, if one of my friends treated me the way she treats Jeff, I'd reduce the amount of time and energy I spend on them.
ReplyDeleteAnd I love the story of getting stranded and having someone who was happy to help. That's what relationships are all about. Not avoiding telling someone when you are coming back home after a trip!
That taxi would have been out of control if it had jumped the curb and splattered Mary like a bug. The old biddy simply wasn't paying attention and won't admit it to Jeff. I believe the name of their restaurant is the Ass Bucket.
ReplyDeleteOh, God, Wanders, so cruel!
ReplyDeleteI agree. Hard times are really what make relationships last, more than what makes a good start. Anyway, it's sad that you had to experience car troubles with everything else. Anyway, I hope you at least have a much better ride right now, and have found very profound uses for the old one. Thanks for sharing your insights! All the best!
ReplyDeleteMario Newman @ Charity Car Donations