Tommy falls for any girl who doesn’t run away from him screaming. “I’m slayed” ramps up the creepiness quotient by 20 points.
What’s Tommy drinking from that can? Generic 7Up?
Wanders, I was about to suggest that perhaps Tommy had the snake tat removed when he was still covered on Iris’s health insurance, but Iris hasn’t worked in years. How DO the Beedies pay their expenses?
Wife-beater undershirt-check. Still lives with Mother-check. Calls said Mother “Ma”-check. Strange slang idiom like “slayed”-check. Weird stalker-style behavior-check.
If any or all of these apply to the part-time stock clerk who gave you a ride home and a diner meal, then you may be about to enter into the worst relationship of your life. And now he knows where you live. This is your brain on stupid.
This PSA brought to you by the Santa Royale Antibeedie society.
I wonder what Tommy is drinking while his twin Mother drinks coffee. Is it Bed Rull? Is it a soft drink? In any case Tommy needs to watch his sugar addiction or it will lead to a downward spiral.
Every breath you take, every move you make... The only time I see the kids these days use "slay" it's regarding appearance, most usually looking fierce and sexy. "Yasss! Slay!" followed by 3 emojis is perhaps the most commonly used phrase on Instagram.
It looks to me as though Tommy is pouring himself a tall, skinny glass of non-dairy creamer.
Of course it also looks to me like June Brigman has paid the ultimate non-euclidean kitchen tribute to Joe Giella. Go ahead and explain to me how those purple cabinets (?) resolve with that counter top and backsplash.
Eww. So Brandy has Tommy stalking her. Tommy is a creepy, wife-beater-wearing, ex-convict with the IQ of a rather slow gerbil, and he still lives with his twin mom. Brandy would be best advised to change her name and move as far away as possible. If someone like Tommy was stalking me, I'd probably pack up and move to the Australian outback or somewhere as equally remote.
Sandi Ego, I was going to suggest Every Breath you take for the jukebox.
Perhaps Tommy had his snake/knife/whatever tattoo removed so he can put Brandy's name there.
He is so creepy. He reminds me of a male version of Dawn: Like Dawn, someone gives them the slightest attention and they're ready to run to the Justice of the Peace and start a family. With Dawn, it's just dopey, With Tommy, it's creepy. If I was Brandy, I'd pay for one of those online background checks and then move and not leave a forwarding address.
My guess is that this will be KM's ham handed lesson on the evils of stalking. I know I will be more than annoyed because I had my ex-boyfriend stalk me after HE broke up with me and it wasn't funny, (like Brandy should do, I moved and left no forwarding address, so I can speak from experience.) but knowing KM, she'll make this into no big deal like she did with Mary and Ted "what a character" Miller.
Here in Maine, "Allen's Coffee Brandy" is the #1 selling booze. I only mention this because a) it has the name Brandy (it's the drink, not the song) and b) mixed with Tommie's milk you get a Biddeford Sombrero, aka "fat ass in a glass."
RobC, I live in Maine too (I'm a transplanted NY'er "from away". My husband is from here.) He told me all about Allen's Coffee Brandy. (He's a recovering alcoholic, so he can speak from experience.) He said it's an acquired taste LOL. I lol'd at your comment.
I like Iris' I heart NY cup, being a NY'er and all. If you go to NY and see someone buying these in the overpriced stores in Times Square you call them a "tool". Anywhere but NY it's cool. I have several in my office that I bought in Goodwill, no doubt from "tools" that had buyer's remorse and donated them. (Hope I didn't offend anyone who's been to NY, just tellin' you what we NY'ers think.) BTW love it here in Maine. The weather is perfect now.
Wow, I've been so busy for the last week I didn't have time to check in. I can't believe how many days of diner dialogue I had to get through. Good things that's a 24-hour diner. I think the meal lasted 24 hours.
For the jukebox, may I suggest "Somebody's Watching Me" by Rockwell?
Why does he think he's in love with her? Even after the world's longest meal, the most personal thing she shared with him is that when she runs, she pretends she's in a movie running from danger. (I'm just imagining her running frantically along the Santa Royale Boardwalk looking over her shoulder.) Other than that, he knows: 1) Her mother is dead. 2) She works at Freda's. 3) She has a cat. 4) She doesn't have a boyfriend.
Loved catching up on the Bold-face Haikus. I agree with Wanders, that's a big part of the reason I check in here. Of course, all of the brilliant comments by everyone else have something to do with it. Your comments really slayed me.
"WHEW! SLOW DOWN. Get to KNOW her more. Become better FRIENDS. Just look at Wilbur and me. We took our time to REALLY get to know each other and ... oh, goodness, wait! ... now I'm with ZAK! ... Never mind!"
Shades of Aldo Kelrast? I don't know. This might not be a "Tommy the stalker" story. It might be a "Tommy falls in love, Brandy breaks Tommy's heart, Tommy struggles with addiction again" story. Who knows? I can't wait to see what happens next! This strip is SO AWESOME!
Don't be shy! I'd love to hear what you have to say about Mary Worth. Just keep it clean, that's all I ask. This is a FAMILY FRIENDLY blog. I don't want to moderate comments, but I will if I have to.
Tommy falls for any girl who doesn’t run away from him screaming. “I’m slayed” ramps up the creepiness quotient by 20 points.
ReplyDeleteWhat’s Tommy drinking from that can? Generic 7Up?
Wanders, I was about to suggest that perhaps Tommy had the snake tat removed when he was still covered on Iris’s health insurance, but Iris hasn’t worked in years. How DO the Beedies pay their expenses?
Just so we all know "Iris loves NY. Isn't that where she went to visit her sick aunt many years ago? How do I even remember this?
ReplyDeleteToday's Boldface Haiku is titled
ReplyDelete"...And The Residents Of Santa Royale Will Call It Brandy's Law...".
Just met?
Watching, like. Slayed!
Whew! Slow down. Know. Friends.
Intend.
Wife-beater undershirt-check.
ReplyDeleteStill lives with Mother-check.
Calls said Mother “Ma”-check.
Strange slang idiom like “slayed”-check.
Weird stalker-style behavior-check.
If any or all of these apply to the part-time stock clerk who gave you a ride home and a diner meal, then you may be about to enter into the worst relationship of your life. And now he knows where you live. This is your brain on stupid.
This PSA brought to you by the Santa Royale Antibeedie society.
If Cougar Mom found out Brandy was much younger, would she approve? What's the age of consent in Santa Royale?
ReplyDeletePlease add CREEP by Radiohead to the Charterstone Jukebox.
I wonder what Tommy is drinking while his twin Mother drinks coffee. Is it Bed Rull? Is it a soft drink? In any case Tommy needs to watch his sugar addiction or it will lead to a downward spiral.
ReplyDeleteEvery breath you take, every move you make...
ReplyDeleteThe only time I see the kids these days use "slay" it's regarding appearance, most usually looking fierce and sexy. "Yasss! Slay!" followed by 3 emojis is perhaps the most commonly used phrase on Instagram.
It looks to me as though Tommy is pouring himself a tall, skinny glass of non-dairy creamer.
ReplyDeleteOf course it also looks to me like June Brigman has paid the ultimate non-euclidean kitchen tribute to Joe Giella. Go ahead and explain to me how those purple cabinets (?) resolve with that counter top and backsplash.
It would be very interesting to see the results of professional analysis of KM's psyche.
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteOutstanding comments today, Wanders and everyone! Really good stuff.
Brandy's Law!!!
-- Scottie McW.
Eww. So Brandy has Tommy stalking her. Tommy is a creepy, wife-beater-wearing, ex-convict with the IQ of a rather slow gerbil, and he still lives with his twin mom. Brandy would be best advised to change her name and move as far away as possible. If someone like Tommy was stalking me, I'd probably pack up and move to the Australian outback or somewhere as equally remote.
ReplyDeleteFauxprof: Antibeedie Society = LOL
ReplyDeleteNothing to say but full agreement with Scottie McW's comments. Thanks, everyone!
ReplyDeleteSandi Ego, I was going to suggest Every Breath you take for the jukebox.
ReplyDeletePerhaps Tommy had his snake/knife/whatever tattoo removed so he can put Brandy's name there.
He is so creepy. He reminds me of a male version of Dawn: Like Dawn, someone gives them the slightest attention and they're ready to run to the Justice of the Peace and start a family. With Dawn, it's just dopey, With Tommy, it's creepy. If I was Brandy, I'd pay for one of those online background checks and then move and not leave a forwarding address.
My guess is that this will be KM's ham handed lesson on the evils of stalking. I know I will be more than annoyed because I had my ex-boyfriend stalk me after HE broke up with me and it wasn't funny, (like Brandy should do, I moved and left no forwarding address, so I can speak from experience.) but knowing KM, she'll make this into no big deal like she did with Mary and Ted "what a character" Miller.
Tommie could be pouring milk.
ReplyDeleteHere in Maine, "Allen's Coffee Brandy" is the #1 selling booze. I only mention this because a) it has the name Brandy (it's the drink, not the song) and b) mixed with Tommie's milk you get a Biddeford Sombrero, aka "fat ass in a glass."
RobC, I live in Maine too (I'm a transplanted NY'er "from away". My husband is from here.) He told me all about Allen's Coffee Brandy. (He's a recovering alcoholic, so he can speak from experience.) He said it's an acquired taste LOL. I lol'd at your comment.
ReplyDeleteI like Iris' I heart NY cup, being a NY'er and all. If you go to NY and see someone buying these in the overpriced stores in Times Square you call them a "tool". Anywhere but NY it's cool. I have several in my office that I bought in Goodwill, no doubt from "tools" that had buyer's remorse and donated them. (Hope I didn't offend anyone who's been to NY, just tellin' you what we NY'ers think.) BTW love it here in Maine. The weather is perfect now.
Wow, I've been so busy for the last week I didn't have time to check in. I can't believe how many days of diner dialogue I had to get through. Good things that's a 24-hour diner. I think the meal lasted 24 hours.
ReplyDeleteFor the jukebox, may I suggest "Somebody's Watching Me" by Rockwell?
Why does he think he's in love with her? Even after the world's longest meal, the most personal thing she shared with him is that when she runs, she pretends she's in a movie running from danger. (I'm just imagining her running frantically along the Santa Royale Boardwalk looking over her shoulder.) Other than that, he knows: 1) Her mother is dead. 2) She works at Freda's. 3) She has a cat. 4) She doesn't have a boyfriend.
Loved catching up on the Bold-face Haikus. I agree with Wanders, that's a big part of the reason I check in here. Of course, all of the brilliant comments by everyone else have something to do with it. Your comments really slayed me.
Thank you to everyone for your very kind compliments these past few days. It is inspiring to be in such sharp-witted company.
ReplyDelete@Imjb 1964--Bless your heart.
@Scottie--Thanks for catching my double entendre the other day!
Sigh. I love this place.
"WHEW! SLOW DOWN. Get to KNOW her more. Become better FRIENDS. Just look at Wilbur and me. We took our time to REALLY get to know each other and ... oh, goodness, wait! ... now I'm with ZAK! ... Never mind!"
ReplyDeleteShades of Aldo Kelrast? I don't know. This might not be a "Tommy the stalker" story. It might be a "Tommy falls in love, Brandy breaks Tommy's heart, Tommy struggles with addiction again" story. Who knows? I can't wait to see what happens next! This strip is SO AWESOME!