Monday, September 10, 2018

Mary Worth 2969

Tobies magically sprout in Mary's daffodil patch because they're daffy!

31 comments:

  1. Bella, we hardly knew ye. Mary will now rush over with comfort muffins and kindness. In the real world, losing a pet can be devastating, ask anyone who’s ever been through it. I cringe to see how KM handles this.

    (Question, and I’d really like to know. Gardening is hardly my strong suit. The only green in my thumb is probably gangrene. But, in Ohio, Daffodils are early spring flowers. Do they really bloom in September in California (other than in a professional greenhouse?)

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  2. Same here in Maine, Fauxprof. Perhaps they're wax daffodils like in I Love Lucy. Can't wait for them to melt.

    Tomorrow. Mary goes to Mr. wynter's house, salmon treats in hand. Mary: "I know these were Bella's favorite. I want you to enjoy them in Bella's memory." Mr. Wynter: "Those are what killed my beloved Bella! Get out of my home, you meddling Lucretia Borgia!"

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  3. Perhaps Mary will whip up a batch of special salmon muffins, with crumbled Beggin' Strips on top, for Mr. Wynter. We know Mary's Cliche Machine will shift into overdrive. (And many thanks to @fauxprof for pointing out how sad the loss of a beloved pet is. Our family knows from experience, including a very recent one.)

    I think daffodils are a spring flower everywhere. Maybe these are Santa Royale mutant plants (or maybe June isn't a gardener).

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  4. Is this Mary's way of letting Charterstone's residents clearly understand that her pool party snacks are NOT to be fed to pets?

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  5. I think I may have the title for today's boldface haiku: Ruh-roh!

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  6. Today's Boldface Haiku is titled

    "Lesson: Cantankerousness Kills".

    Hear?
    What?
    Died!
    Oh No!

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  7. I bet those muffins were chocolate chip muffins....DARK chocolate.

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  8. 100 to 1 that it is the melamine laced imported salmon slurry that Mary buys in bulk and uses as the base for her 'squares' that did it.

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  9. I was happy to see that a character with some depth had finally been introduced into the strip, only to have this happen.

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  10. My neighbor's sister had a dog; a yellow lab named Libby. Once, on Easter Sunday, Libby bit my leg and tore a hole in my suit's pant leg. Libby would bark violently at the fence at my puggle. Libby was a jerk.

    Libby died this spring. I wasn't upset, so I can understand Toby's elation.

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  11. "YOU POISONED MY DOG!!!!!!"

    Not the best way to show kindness, Mary.

    Meanwhile, Toby can't wipe the grin from her face.

    -- Scottie McW.

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  12. Toby certainly is the town crier for Charterstone. Is she just clueless (possible..), or is she just being a typical Californian, calling her neighbor "Old Man Wynter" as if that season is just like any other? Thanks, Toby, for pressing a title like this without thought for the terror it strikes in the hearts of Easterners, who are currently facing not only the gloom of Tropical Depression Gordon's rainfall but the onset of a chilly autumn...It's enough to kill anyone's dog.

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  13. Like everyone else, I'm pretty sure it was the salmon squares.

    Poor Bella. She seemed to be an excellent judge of character.

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  14. My prediction--Mary gets sued by Mr Wynter for poisoning his dog with those disgusting salmon thingies. Charterstone residents will perform an intervention to tell Mary her cooking isn't all that and her muffins are, at the end of the day, just muffins.

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  15. I too lost a beloved animal, my cat Michael (named after Michael Nesmith of course) in February. He was so beloved. He wasn’t the brightest bulb in the box, but he was the sweetest. He’d watch Judge Judy with me and sleep on my hip. If I had a busy body neighbor like Mary coming over with her poisonous food, spouting platitudes about my beloved Michael, I would do more than show her the door.

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  16. My little dog just recovered from pancreatitis and is on a special diet (no more table scraps or salmon squares).
    We had to euthanize our 15 yr old dog 4 wks ago. Just 2 weeks ago I had to euthanize my beloved horse, who was only 13. Absolutely devastating. The loss of a pet is so painful, especially one that is a teammate and trusted partner.
    RIP Bella, you gave Toby what she deserved.

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  17. Our Portuguese Water Dog got some brownies off the counter, earning herself a trip to the vet for a charcoal flush and a $1,200 bill.

    Chocolate is toxic to dogs; so are raisins - both common varieties in muffins and cookies.

    Mr. Wynter might not have known this, not had a car to get Bella to the vet, or not had the ability to handle a large vet bill.

    If Toby calls him "Old Man Wynter", what does she call Mary?

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  18. Comic Strip Animals Gather for Bella’s Rites

    “We’re here for our girl Bella,” says Snoopy, wiping away a tear.

    “Her little journey ended when Old Man Wynter force-fed her all those salmon snacks,” growled Daisy.

    “Yeah, well, what about that Old Biddie Worth who produced those so-called snacks in her toxic kitchen?” chimed in Otto, obviously ready for battle.

    Loudspeaker: ATTENTION! All Animals With Grudges Against Murray Worth, Please Report to the Podium to Discuss Action Plans. CORRECTION: Mary Worth

    Ruff and Grimm, panting hard: “Let’s (pant, pant) get her!”

    Barfy and Sam: “What are we barking about here? An actual attack? Count us in!”

    Mary Worth: “Who’d like to try this platter of meatball appetizers?”

    Chaos ensues, and the moment for action passes.

    Annie’s Sandy gets the last sad word: “Arf.”


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  19. Meg, can’t stop laughing. If only someone would draw this as a real comic. The only comic dogs you forgot are Odie from Garfield, Rover from Red and Rover and Earl from Mutts.

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  20. Regina, I didn’t forget them. It’s Rosh Hashana, and they’re at services.

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  21. meg, that was brilliant. Your follow-up as well.

    I must say, I did not see this coming. I wonder if there was onion in the salmon squares? That's also toxic to dogs. Poor little angry Bella. I guess she had to die so that Mary had an excuse to visit Old Man Wynter and commence extreme meddling.

    Sandi Ego, I'm so sorry for your recent losses, and I hope your little dog recovers quickly. My eighteen-year-old cat moves every day a little closer to the rainbow bridgeI would say that I hope Moy handles it with sensitivity, but I think that's asking for a bit too much.

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  22. No daffodils now in southern California, for sure. It's too hot. It's cooler in Santa Royale (near Goleta) but daffs are bulbs, and still follow the gardening rules.
    Also, I'm pretty sure it's against the law to call anyone "old" in California. It's OK to call Toby 'clueless' however.

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  23. Meg:You left out the Pooch Cafe dogs, who can cause some real havoc, like catapult Mary into the sun or sic Droolia on her. Just tell Poncho that Mary works for Canada Post.

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  24. Oh, no! It was the salmon snacks! Will Mary feel a twinge of guilt? ... Nah!

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  25. Jack- Pooch Cafe has been replaced by the wretched Cat News in our local paper.

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  26. Tuesday: Now I have more reason to hate this vapid idiot Toby. Animals are our family. They give more love than humans do. I want to reach into the comic and punch the you know what out of Toby. No wonder Bella hated this bleached blonde bimbo.

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  27. Meg: who gets any paper these days?

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  28. Toby just proved herself to be a sociopath. She’s officially in my dead-to-me file.

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  29. Look out, Old Man Wynter, here comes Mary. She wants to help you. Your life is about to go from bad to worse.

    Love the old-timey chair and doilies right out of the '30s. Nice touch. I wonder if he listens to Benny Goodman on his Victrola.

    -- Scottie McW.

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  30. To Toby, the only good animal is one she amateurishly models from gray clay.

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  31. Everyone seems to think that Bella was deliberately or accidentally poisoned. But there's another possibility: Having lived with "Old Man" Wynter for so long and now having both Mary and Toby inveigling themselves into poor Bella's life, I think it quite likely that Bella committed suicide. Wouldn't we all be tempted to do the same under identical circumstances?

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Don't be shy! I'd love to hear what you have to say about Mary Worth. Just keep it clean, that's all I ask. This is a FAMILY FRIENDLY blog. I don't want to moderate comments, but I will if I have to.