A week ago I was thinking there was light at the end of the tunnel, but here I am still in the tunnel. And the fact that Eve seems to want to stay in the tunnel, and not move toward the light can only mean one thing: Therapy Dog Story starts tomorrow.
Is it over? It seems to be over, and tomorrow we will have a spring pool party, and Mary will set her salmon appetizers in direct sunlight, and they will become salmonella appetizers and will kill Greta and Max and Libby the one-eyed cat, and it will start all over again....
ReplyDeleteSob.
For sure, Wanders. There's no way we're getting rid of these two without somehow involving Mary. No doubt that pushing a book cart around Mountainview Hospital for the last 60 yers has made her quite the expert on therapy dogs. I'm just hoping that when Saul and Eve show up with their dogs, looking for Mary, they instead run into Dr. Jeff who throws all four of them out into the street. Wasn't he allergic to dogs as well as cats? I think that's why Mary had to get rid of poor Chester the beagle.
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I hope that glorified mud puddle they're standing by is actually The Pit of Despair, and Greta and Max pull Saul and Eve into it. The four of them rapidly sink, never to be seen again, glug glug, bubble bubble.
ReplyDeleteSalmon appetzers becoming salmonella appetizers -- good one, @fauxprof!
So What’s Mary up to these Days?
ReplyDeleteMary’s age category (130+) becomes eligible for Covid vaccine. She proceeds grandly in her Oldsmobuick to Mount View Hospital. Only one other person is present; she’s Mary’s old principal from St. Bridget’s Academy for Meddling Girls.
“Mary, is that you? I see you’re not dead yet. Pity. There’s only one dose of the vaccine left, and my name is on it!” “Suck lemons, Sister Angelina Jolie! Ah, here’s my special friend, Dr. Cory, in the examination room with a syringe! Hello, Jeff!”
“Sorry, Mary, today’s the day for the 150+ group. You’ll have to come back next week.” Mary: “&#@*&%!” Sister AJ: “If she lives that long! Mwah ha ha ha!”
“I’ll see you in hell, Sister! And you, too, Jeff Cory!”
Mary sees Greta making a deposit on the Great Lawn of Charterstone and calls the dog warden.
Mary sees (through a window and a telescope) Ian, wearing a kilt, rocking out to Twist and Shout. (Weel, shake it oop, Bairn, twist and shout)
Mary orders Mr. Allora to clean up after Greta and to bring her a fresh pint of gin from Freda’s Package Store.
Ian comes over for a wee drinkie with Mary, and later sends Mr. Allora out to Booze Team.
BUZZZZZZ! It’s Saul and Eve, bow ties and bandanas in hand and paw, arriving to humbly ask Mary about therapy dogs at Mount View Hospital. Of course.
ReplyDeleteAre we done yet? Are we done yet? Are we done yet? . . .
This long forced march through the jungles of malaise-ia has made me appreciate the fast-paced, rollicking good times we had with Arther [sic] and Entertainer Esme (she sings AND dances!). Ah, those were the days, eh gang?
-- Scottie McW.
Scottie- IMO Peak Mary Worth occurred during the ill-feted voyage of the Cluster#$%@* del Mare. That was NINE years ago. Yet here we all (not all, actually; some faint-hearted and sensible folks gave up) are, expecting improvement.
ReplyDelete@meg and Scottie McW., those plots were like Noel Coward compred to the awful pap ad nauseam KM has served up the past several years. Oh for the days of the Keno Brothers rescuing Dawn and Wilbur, and Entertainer Esme blowing cigarette smoke through her teeth! KM isn't even phoning it in.
ReplyDelete@meg - please don't tell me it's been nine years. NINE YEARS?! If that's true, today's quote should have been:
ReplyDelete"This life is worth living... unless all we make of it is reading Mary Worth on a daily basis and then sitting around drinking coffee, trying to come up with some funny, original snark."
HelenClark
Oh Meg! I laughed so hard my husband needed to put on headphones so he could hear his Zoom call with our son.
ReplyDeleteIs it kosher to repeat a comment? I got this in too early for Sunday and now it's Monday, but it's about Sunday's strip, and I still want to share the link.
ReplyDeleteThe quote from William James just does not stand up to even the most cursory analysis, but it reminds me of an early TV show called "Life Is Worth Living" that I sometimes found myself watching as a little (non-Catholic) kid. I didn't really have any idea what Bishop Fulton J. Sheen was talking about but I was kind of mesmerized by his slightly scary Dracula-like handsomeness, the liquefaction of his satiny cape and other vestments as he strode back and forth across the set in front of a wealth of wood paneling. His beany was fascinating, too. Check it out: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ilvT9t4WrD4
Yahoonski? We're talking Mary Worth, right? I'm pretty sure it's okay to be repetitive.
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