Mary Worth 3891

We were promised confrontation! We were promised retaliation! We were promised VENGENCE! Instead we get -- well, I don't know what this is. But I don't like it. I expect The Batman, and instead I get Sensitive New Age Ian.

Mary Worth 3890

This is why H.R. is so unnecessary. Just let angry employees retaliate against each other. It makes things so much simpler.

Mary Worth 3889

Please let it be Toby with a pair of binoculars! "I see you, Helen Moss, lusting after the past! I'm reporting you to school management."

Mary Worth 3888

Helen is pausing again. This is going to be a good week, with plenty of pausing and plot redundancies. Hopefully there are lots of photos of Ian in that yearbook.

Mary Worth 3887

Ian Cameron

“We are what we pretend to be,
so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.”
― Kurt Vonnegut

Mary Worth 3886

Uh-oh.

Mary Worth 3885

For an artist, Toby isn't that good at describing people. A twenty-year age range, the vaguest description of height... but it's enough for Ian. That steel blue gaze can only mean one thing: Vengence is mine, saith the Scott.

Mary Worth 3884

"This is the real thing, Ian. Not like when you thought Jannie was actually attracted to you. Ha ha ha ha ha!"

Mary Worth 3883

"And I remember, Ian, how resentful of me you were because I didn't appreciate you the way Jannie did, and how you almost ended our marriage over it. Not that I haven't forigiven you, Ian. Of course I've fogiven you... But I never forget."

Mary Worth 3882

The marriage is saved. The black armbands are off. Toby thinks, "Huh, I did not expect him to believe me. Mary said he would, but I reviewed past interactions and was sure he'd think me a brazen woman."

Mary Worth 3881

"Define truth, dear."

Mary Worth 3880

I'm starting to think that Toby might be a little intimidated by her brilliant and accomplished husband, but I'm not 100 percent sure yet. Maybe by the end of the week, I'll have this figured out.

Mary Worth 3879

Toby must have done something really, really bad to likely lose her job. Maybe she made this public sculpture in Huntsville, Alabama:

Mary Worth 3878

This is why Women's Liberation has failed. The modern woman's never-ending quest to appear strong prevents her from confiding in her husband, who is always more than happy and able to solve all her problems. The things we learn from Mary Worth.

Mary Worth 3877

Reacting badly is sort of Ian's bailiwick. You have no story if he suddenly handles things maturely.

Mary Worth 3876

Toby, you need to talk with Professor Harlan Jones. He deals with this kind of thing all the time.

Mary Worth 3875

"Well, you see, Mary -- Wait, is that a drawing of Cal on your end table??"

Mary Worth 3874

During Mary's time off between meddles, she has clearly been expanding her baking repertoire. Soon, she'll have Toby plumped up, and Cal will lose all hormonic drives and urges.

Mary Worth 3873

For you, it was a bad night. But for the rest of us, it was one heck of a week. Or was it a month?

Mary Worth 3872

Thank you, Ian, for shoving Toby out of bed. The excruciating dream is over. I hope Toby has learned her lesson about avoiding the very appearance of evil. Especially when there are binoculars involved.

Here's your Charterstone Puzzle for today: Submit an inappropriate Bartlett's quote* for this panel.

*Source: Jerry Smith, MMandM, April 6, 20220

Mary Worth 3871

Toby, he's just trying to 'befriend' you.

Mary Worth 3870

I'm uncomfortable with the level of sexuality in the strip today. Also, judging by Cal's eye dilations, the use of drugs. We are definitely crossing into PG-13 territory here.

Mary Worth 3869

This is just like when Toby was a student dating her professor, Ian Cameron.

Mary Worth 3886

One thing I've alwasy admired about the Camerons is what good communicators they are. Ian has communicated very clearly that Toby is not to disturb him with her women's issues, especially while he's sleeping.

Mary Worth 3867

I'm really starting to think Toby might be worried about something. I mean, I don't want to sound arrogant or anything, but I've known Toby since I was her age, and I think I'm starting to read her pretty well.

Mary Worth 3866

I know Toby has had trouble falling asleep, but her memory of Helen has really softened since yesterday's red-faced floating head from hell. I'm sure she'll be dreaming sweet dreams in no time.

Mary Worth 3865

I don't know... does this count as a floating head, because if it does, it is perhaps the best floating head of all time!!

Mary Worth 3864

Oh, Toby, it's gonna' be all right. Just keep remembering what Cal said, "Ignore your problems. Focus on the good stuff, like Frisbee golf, and you'll feel fine."

Mary Worth 3863

Oh, he will. He will. Of course he will. Why would he ever trust his own wife, when he can trust Helen Moss instead?