Thursday, May 26, 2022

Mary Worth 3917

Two years?? Really? Two years? And yet, you seem to be exactly the same couple as the last time we saw you two years ago!

This is one of those rare instances when the Worthiverse timeline intersects with the real-world timeline, and things can get confusing. Let me explain:

In March 2020, Dawn and Jared fell in love. But she was still in love with a Frenchman named Hugo. She decided to dump her hot French boyfriend because he liked French versions of things better than American. So she started dating her quirky, hot-in-a-nerdy way, clumsy friend, Jared. Then she thought her father died. And now here we are.

In the real world, in March 2020, the earth stopped because of Covid-19, and we are just now returning to normal. Does that help you understand?

9 comments:

  1. fauxprofMay 26, 2022 at 5:50 AM

    Thanks for the explanation, Wanders. The reason that Jared and Dawn act like they barely know one another is that Jared is the only person in Santa Royale who followed Covid protocols.

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  2. CattMay 26, 2022 at 6:43 AM

    Two years and they still haven't gotten past a peck on the cheek.

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  3. KitKatMay 26, 2022 at 7:08 AM

    The baboons are relived that Dawn and Jared are moving on. The reclining one just said to the one on the right, “They’re leaving at last! Can you bring me a pillow?”

    Do people the ages that Dawn and Jared supposedly are still call it dating? What about “I can’t believe we’ve been together almost two years” instead? Whatever, Dawn seems unenthusiastic. She won’t even look at Jared.

    People feel so comfortable around Jared, they forget he’s there.

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  4. ThunderheelsMay 26, 2022 at 8:13 AM

    Dawn needs to watch out. The next stop is the cougar enclosure. Jared might find an older, attractive woman to date.
    I am so sorry, I couldn't help myself.

    ReplyDelete
  5. AnonymousMay 26, 2022 at 8:41 AM

    Does that sign read "Cougar Encounter"? Is this foreshadowing? Clumsy Jared tripping into the next enclosure and encountering a cougar? Will the cougar feel comfortable around Jared?

    HelenClark

    ReplyDelete
  6. KitKatMay 26, 2022 at 8:46 AM

    @Thunderheels, your comment prompted me to snicker out loud. Is it possible that Jared will encounter…HELEN MOSS?!

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  7. Chester the DogMay 26, 2022 at 10:42 AM

    The baboons are more into their dating than Jared and Dawn are!

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  8. GarnetMay 26, 2022 at 1:10 PM

    Cougar encounter? They put Iris in the zoo?

    ReplyDelete
  9. AnonymousMay 31, 2022 at 9:54 AM

    If I were Jared I would give Dawn the cold shoulder. It appears she would leave him if the chance comes along.

    ReplyDelete

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