She's back... This will be excellent.Here's a few possible questions Mary might ask tomorrow:
1. What's it like to kiss a man? It's been so long, I've forgotten.Those are just a few I came up with. I'd love to hear your suggestions. In fact, let's make it a Not-A-Real-Contest contest. The reader who comes up with the best question as judged by the Condo Board will get to choose a song for the Charterstone Jukebox! All songs must be approved by the Condo Board, and remember, this is not a real contest. Let the meddling begin!
2. Should your father and I elope?
3. How serious are you about this whole marriage thing?
4. Would you consider marrying one of these random waiters in slacks instead?
Read Today's Full Strip
Heeere's Mary!
ReplyDeleteAdrian, here's a question for you. Do I still look ... 'manly'?
ReplyDelete"Would Ted sneak off to the restrooms to tell his mother or sister he loves them? No, I don't think so either. So, uh, Adrian, there's something you should know. Let's see if I can find some way to tell you."
ReplyDeleteAdrian, I have this friend who's being taken in by a con man who's only after her money. She's very talented--like you, she's a real doctor and everything. But she just seems to be totally blinded to the obvious signs that he's a fraudulent scam artist. He makes enormous financial commitments to her adoring family members, then acts like he can't keep them because of "these difficult financial times," even pretending he's been scammed by that Arnie Gotoff fellow who has been in the news recently. He keeps insisting he wants to elope, just because he's so anxious to get married to her and doesn't want to wait for all the formalities. I mean, she's got a nice hefty doctor's salary--just like you. So I'm just wondering why she doesn't catch on. You know, it reminds me just the teensiest bit of you and Ted, although it's really nothing like you two. So anyway, here's my hypothetical question: What do you think I should tell my stupid, clueless, airheaded, obnoxious friend to get her to stop being so incredibly thick?
ReplyDelete--wheelhead
Adrian, I have a question for you, what is your social security number?
ReplyDeleteAdrian, here's a question for you. Does the pattern on my sweater make you queasy?
ReplyDeleteAdrian, here's a question for you. do you always drink this much red Kool aid in your car, er, at home?
Adrian, do you ever wash your hair?
ReplyDelete"I have a question for you. Did you just fall off a turnip truck?"
ReplyDeleteSo Mary didn't get up tp use the sandbox, she got up to follow Ted on purpose! At least she could have splashed a little water on her skirt to make it like she did go to the ladies room.
ReplyDeleteAdrian, how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
ReplyDeleteAh Adrian, is Ted a medium or something? I mean, can he communicate with the dead? Like his dead wife Lydia, for example.
ReplyDeleteAdrian.... have you ever been in a Turkish prison?
ReplyDeleteAdrian, what do you think of my top? It's from the Bobby Brady collection.
ReplyDelete"Would it upset you if I said that Ted is A BIG FAT LIAR?
ReplyDelete'Adrian, I love your perfume, whats it called...new car smell??
ReplyDelete"Adrian, I have a question for you. If Sally has ten candy bars and is consuming them at a rate of one bar per five minutes, how long will it take her to find out that her boyfriend is a fiendish cad?"
ReplyDelete...Are you gonna finish that glass of blood?
ReplyDeleteMary: "Adrian, are you stupid or something?"
ReplyDeleteAdrian: "Stupid is as stupid does."
Adrian, didn't they stop manufacturing plastic Playwigs before you were born?
ReplyDeleteAdrian, why is that blond woman not wearing her hair in a ponytail?
ReplyDeleteI am flabbergasted that Mary was able to go to the bathroom that quick and beat it back to the table, UNSEEN, before Ted!! (I do hope she remembered to wash her hands!)
Doesn't Ted remind you a little of Humphrey Bogart? Woman-to-woman, I'll bet you feel a little bit like Lauren Bacall when he calls you "queeny".
ReplyDeleteAdrian, have you ever noticed that the more intelligent and sophisticated a woman is, the more self-defeating and foolish are her choices and patterns of behavior with romantic partners?
Do you think these foolish choices could be triggered and perpetuated by destructively inaccurate myths women believe about men today?
Do you think that Lauren used a curling iron to achieve those soft waves in her hair? Have you ever tried a curling iron?
Does your chewing gum lose its flavor on the bedpost overnight?
ReplyDeleteIf I know this strip at all, we won't get to the question until this Sunday at the earliest. Tomorrow will be Mary saying "It's about Ted..."
ReplyDelete"So, Adrian, don't you think this might be a good time to visit your brother Drew at Peace Village? I justknow he'd be so eager to share the joy of your upcoming wedding...if you would just tell him...in person..."
ReplyDeleteDo you know where the ladies room is, Dear"
ReplyDeleteAdrian, who does Number Two work for? Who does Number Two work for?!!
ReplyDeleteI wonder why Jeff doesn't slink over to Cybil Sheperd at the next table and ask for her autograph.
ReplyDeleteI'm loving Mary's crouched, reach-to-pounce look. That's classic!
ReplyDeleteAdrian, I have a question to ask you....would you like to have the liver with some favre beans and a nice chianti? It's my favorite.
ReplyDeleteoriginally I thought the alt-text said "It's about me!" which is just as accurate if you imagine self-righteous lil' Mary saying it.
ReplyDelete"Adrian, I have a question for you. Where are the snowdens of yesteryear?"
Adrian, I have a question for you...is it true, what I saw written about you in the bathroom stall?
ReplyDeleteOR
...is it true, what I saw written about Ted in the men's room stalls?
Which shirt is tackier, this, or my pink palm trees?
ReplyDeleteSorry, I meant to say READY-TO-POUNCE look!
ReplyDeleteWhat are you ordering, Adrian? I can't decide between the kitty litter and the shrimp scampi.
ReplyDelete...we've been out to dinner every night for two weeks, why haven't we been on the front page of the Charterstone Times yet?
ReplyDeleteAdrien, have you ever clutched your purse to your chest, like I'm doing, to keep muggers, thieves, and men you're dating from getting their hands on it? Because it's a maneuver you need to learn.
ReplyDelete(a revisement)
ReplyDelete"Which is tackier, this or my shirt with the pink palm trees? I'm entering a contest."
Mary says to Adrian,"How much do you really know about Ted? and is he very close to his mother?"
ReplyDeleteAnd, finally, "Have you considered Bachelor #2?"
Adrian, they say that horizontal stripes make you look fatter than you are. Do you think this is true?
ReplyDeleteRobert's "clutch your purse" question made me laugh out loud. Sure, I've had a glass of Kool Aid this evening, but I vote for his comment as winner so far.
ReplyDeleteI like Jeremiah's question best.
ReplyDeleteAdrian, I have a question for you. How IS V8 Splash? I don't really like tomato juice, but I've heard good things about V8 Splash.
ReplyDeleteA couple things come to mind:
ReplyDelete"Why are you drinking fruit punch out of a wine glass?"
"Is your boyfriend as much of a loser as he appears? ...because people are starting to wonder."
"What does it feel like to be replaced by a younger, more emotional version of yourself, have your common sense checked at the door, and have emotions override intelligent thought?
Er...I mean to be in love. Your father and I were wondering..."
"Hypothetically speaking, if I had followed Ted into the men's room, eavesdropped on his private conversation, and overheard something vaguely-possibly-suspicious-sounding...would you take that as grounds to break up with him? Or would I hypothetically have to resort to more drastic measures?"
to me, Anonymous numero 3 takes it all.
ReplyDelete