Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Mary Worth 1,641

This is EXACTLY why I started this blog.

Today's Full Strip

37 comments:

  1. ...and she's helping everyone at Charterstone with their pain simply by not being there.

    Shouldn't these two be dead from heat exhaustion, sun poisoning and scorpion bites by now?

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  2. Wanders, you will be remembered well. Mary Worth, I'm not so sure! :-)

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  3. I've lost track - is this Week Two or Week Three of MaryFest? All in the space of the first morning at Pax (one yoga class, one lunch, one ramble in an arid orange wasteland). I suppose it could be worse - at least Mary hasn't mentioned "Ask Wendy."

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  4. I'm confused, is Mary describing herself as a sadist or a masochist today?

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  5. Wow- I though I mistakenly opened a strip from last week.

    At what point is Mary confronted by a group of Pax Wellness facility and asked to stop interfering with the patients?

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  6. And Mary, of course, has experienced EVERY single kind of painful experience and can help everyone. When will the Pax Wellness Center offer her a job?

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  7. I'm so imperfect. If I could extract just a drop of Mary's dainty, Jean Nate scented perspiration and place it in a vile to wear around my neck for eternity, perhaps I could become half as wise and omniscient as she is.

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  8. I Want Proud Mary to Keep on Burning as I Pour More Gasoline on HerJuly 30, 2013 at 9:20 AM

    Suddenly, the International Space Station falls from the sky, flattening both of them.

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  9. Is it just me, or does Mary look really smug and insincerely self-deprecating in Panel One?

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  10. Wanders- thank you for your selfless commitment.

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  11. @God: You may have meant "vial" but I think your choice actually works better! :)

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  12. @Nance: No, you called it. She's as much as giggling over June's lil' pain.

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  13. Chin Napkin GroupieJuly 30, 2013 at 10:33 AM

    The similarities between Mary and Mother Teresa are astounding although Mother Teresa didn't brag as much.

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  14. Occupy Santa RoyaleJuly 30, 2013 at 10:46 AM

    June looks so excited about painful experiences in panel 2.

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  15. I'm so glad June finally grew a neck! I believe she's all better now. Mary can move on. Well, she COULD move on, but that's not her way, and it would leave us wanting so much more!

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  16. Dawn Weston's Evil TwinJuly 30, 2013 at 1:52 PM

    Okay, Mary lost her husband in the 1920s or so. That was awful. But what other painful experiences has Mary had? She leads a pretty placid existence in Charterstone. I'm sipping a Margarita and watching my nail polish dry, which is more exciting than the "conversation" in the orange desert.

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  17. Ahem, Dawn Weston's Evil Twin! Are we perhaps forgetting Mary's tragic childhood of utter poverty? Fertile grounds for painful experiences there, fertile grounds! And then there was the time when Whatshername broke Mary's priceless crystal swans. These are just two things that popped into my head without having to think much. Mary has a calm and beatific exterior, but underneath roils pain and despair and tragedy - which in Mary's case, of course, just made her a better person. Hail Mary!!!

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  18. I think Mary also once had a painful case of the shingles.

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  19. @Shmoopie at 2:25 PM, not only did clumsy Whatshername break Mary's swans, those swans had been given to Mary by JACK! Oh, the pain! Oh, the humanity!

    I bet Wanders remembers the identity of Whatshername.

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  20. I remember Whatshername! It was Rita the Drunk! Remember when Mary relegated her to the downtown Women's Shelter? One of my favorite characters of all time!

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  21. Mary knows pain. She has...carried a tureen of hot soup, sat in a cold ice skating venue, been heckled at on a cake baking TV program, been pricked by a rose in her garden and forced to sit at a tableless spot at the Bum Boat. Oh Mary, we weep for you!

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  22. New-Neck June's expression of unbridled Mary-worship is utterly disturbing.

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  23. Mary seems only to help pepole woh need the least help upper class white people.

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  24. If she really wants to help why doesn't she visit Compton in CA that human Q-tip Mary is the most narcissisitic person ever.

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  25. Don't forget! Mary knows the pain of being stalked by Captain Kangaroo, aka Aldo Kelrast.

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  26. Yea, I just read Wednesday's strip! The Widow June will go forward and become the next Mary Worth.

    Case solved.

    Now Mary can begin that wild fling with the sexy male massage therapist. (What do you call a male masseuse?)

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  27. Wednesday...

    In the second panel, I suppose Mary is pointing at June (so rude!), but it sure looks like a pistol. Add to that the sinister shadows - prefiguring of something dastardly about to happen? Ha, let's not hold our breath. This is Mary Worth, after all.

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  28. Yes, that second panel... the ominous nature of the drawing suggests a sinister act has just happened: Mary has taken over control of June's mind. The command being programmed into her brain: 'you WILL help others--or I will kill you!'

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  29. WEDNESDAY

    Why did Mary have to leave Charterstone to cure a widow of her loneliness and self-pity? All this could have happened to Gina after Bobby got a vicious header.

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  30. Moy drools offensive and trite nonsense like this, and it gets published? Everyone dies, get over it?

    To the vomitorium go I.

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  31. Believe me Mary. We share your pain.

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  32. June is a Dawn-Jim hybrid in the desert. Details of a tragic death and/or injury are replaced by saguaro. Same seagulls, same stories: bereavement > fear > inaction > futility > Mary Worth > charity

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  33. I know I'm finding this painful....and Mary isn't helping.

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  34. Thursday...

    "Life is Beautiful" - what a terrific film title! Someone should make a movie with that title. It could feature two women wandering in an ugly arid landscape who magically keep changing their clothes, even though they're not carrying suitcases, bags, or etc. Then the blonde woman morphs into a brainless zombie, beaten into submission by the older woman's platitudinous prattling.

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  35. Please. Make. It. Stop.

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  36. Dawn Weston's Evil TwinAugust 1, 2013 at 5:38 PM

    Thursday's strip: YES! During her walk in the desert with the widow June, Mary's pants have changed from a stunning salmon-pink that matched her top to an electric blue, and now, back to the stunning salmon-pink again! Why has she been changing her pants repeatedly during their post-lunch walk, you ask? Well, I suspect that Mary and June have been up to some naughty fun in between panels! I knew it all along! You go, Mary!

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  37. Mary's "Depends" have failed her again, hence the change of slacks.

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Don't be shy! I'd love to hear what you have to say about Mary Worth. Just keep it clean, that's all I ask. This is a FAMILY FRIENDLY blog. I don't want to moderate comments, but I will if I have to.