Sunday, June 30, 2019

Mary Worth 3149

And this is why I blog about Mary Worth: Because someday, I'll be lying in a hospital bed, deteriorating from the inside, knowing the end is near, and asking that essential question, was my life worthwhile? Did I make a difference? What did I accomplish? And I'll know deep down in my soul that I spent the majority of my adult life reading Mary Worth. And with that realization, I can look forward to burning in hell, because it will be so much more interesting.

Thursday, June 27, 2019

Mary Worth 3148

Tell me more, Jeff, about how this happens to many women. Tell me more.

I'm really struggling to find the words to express how I feel about this story and where it is at. But the image that comes to mind is Jeff's boat stuck on a sandbar.

Wednesday, June 26, 2019

Mary Worth 3147

I was inspired to try the monkfish when I realized I would be celibate for the rest of my life.

Monday, June 24, 2019

Mary Worth 3146

So much is revealed about Mary and Jeff's relationship as they gossip about Wilbur and Estelle. Mary wants an adventurous eater. Jeff feels stagnant. Their one hope is that Estelle and Wilbur are ready for something new and will break up, thus confirming the value of their own dull, listless, yet committed relationship.

Friday, June 21, 2019

Mary Worth 3145

Our parallel emotional histories consist of sunsets and seafood.

Mary and Jeff's failed attempt to replicate human language reminds me of several similar extraterrestrial efforts. The first is Nathan W. Pyle's brilliant strip, Strange Planet:

And of course, the dolphins circling the boat, hoping Mary and Jeff will perish, hearkens directly back to the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy:

Tuesday, June 18, 2019

Mary Worth 3144

When Mary gets giddy for gossip, she becomes bonkers for baking.

Sunday, June 16, 2019

Mary Worth 3143

I think the pot just called the kettle fat.

I love that they're singing a song about trying to cheat on your partner using the personal ads.

Friday, June 14, 2019

Mary Worth 3142

After what she went through with Arthur, Estelle's bar has been lowered significantly.

Thursday, June 13, 2019

Mary Worth 3141

I'm intrigued by a restaurant that offers quiche and catfish on the menu, but attracts customers by putting the most garish hamburger applique imaginable on its front window. I'm not sure what sort of visual metaphor June Brigman is going for here, but if it has something to do with sex, I don't want to know.

Wednesday, June 12, 2019

Mary Worth 3140

Ha ha ha ha ha!

Hey, didn't we estimate Fabiana's emerald ring to be about 10 grand as well? They both like music and laughing, and they've both been scammed out of $10,000. So much in common.

Tuesday, June 11, 2019

Mary Worth 3139

What a shock! But of course, the bald guy always gets the babe.

Monday, June 10, 2019

Mary Worth 3138

It's a hamburger joint. Who do you think she's going to see there? Duh.

Wait a minute... Is the Estelle story still going on? I mean, Estelle really drove home the point that her Silverdater was not good looking... Could it be??

Friday, June 7, 2019

Mary Worth 3137

If looks are secondary to MANY other things, doesn't that make them, like, 47th or something? And apparently, Mr. Silverdater is ugly as sin, but he breaks into spontaneous song on the phone, and Estelle enjoys laughing at him. That's LOVE!

Wednesday, June 5, 2019

Mary Worth 3536

You hope to meet him SOON? Let's not rush things, Estelle! You haven't even sent him thousands of dollars yet.

Tuesday, June 4, 2019

Mary Worth 3135

What's he like? I don't really know. You see, I'm taking my time getting to know him. But we're getting married next Tuesday.

Monday, June 3, 2019

Mary Worth 3134

I was only joking on Thursday, when I said that Estelle was back on SilverDaters.com. But while I was sleeping in on Sunday, indeed, she got back on the horse. Way to go, Estelle. Please remember, Arthur wasn't her first failure on Silver Daters. There were also, these guys: