Friday, December 6, 2019

Mary Worth 3245

I literally thought she needed more space because of her rapid weight gain. Then I realized she was pushing out (again) the one man she loves, and who loves her. What a doof.

24 comments:

  1. Zak, if you loose your one true love, I know of a check out girl who may be unattached.

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  2. She needs an Epi-pen and an emergency room. Iris, did you eat the shellfish?

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  3. Ha haaa haaaa... I'm glad I saw Iris's giant head before I got dressed this morning, Wanders. Now I've only wet my pajamas!

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  4. Does this mean Zak has to move out of his luxurious downtown condo and move in with Tommy?

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  5. Wouldn't it be funny if Zak brings a boombox and plays it under Iris' window at Charterstone the same time Wilbur's boomboxing Estelle?

    Wow, you nailed it Wanders. Iris looks like she's ready to explode. She is such a moron. She goes to Dr. Dismissive and takes what he says at face value, no diagnostic tests to make sure nothing else is going on and then she breaks up with Zak with no communication as to what may or may not be ailing her, like people in a relationship would do.

    Does KM ever interact with real people or does she just hide inside her home creating dreck? I will positively throw up if she goes back to Wilbur.

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  6. Oh Gawd, Iris is getting weird. Emotional fragility does not become her. Get a grip, sweetheart, before you mess everything up.

    Meanwhile, Wilbur senses an opening. Please, no.

    -- Scottie McW.

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  8. Today's Boldface Haiku is titled

    "Iris Is A Big Fat Mess".

    Too much help!
    Take off...
    No! Fine. More.
    Zak, space.
    What?

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  9. Who is that girl who got very fat in the Oompa Loompa movie?

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    Replies
    1. Violet Beauregarde? As far as I recall that was who it was in the book. I did not watch the movie.

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  10. Uh-oh, Zak, it looks like you're about to be written out of this strip. Oh well. I guess the only bright side would be that after Estelle decides to take Wilbur back, he then sees that Iris has moved back into Charterstone and dumps Estelle for her. Sorry, Estelle, but you and that white-eyed, white-nosed cat are wearing thin.

    HelenClark

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  11. You think you need some space? SOME SPACE?? Honey, you're gonna need ALL of the space soon!

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    Replies
    1. All of spacetime, and that may not be enough to accommodate her. We may be about to witness her own Big Bang that will give birth to the next multiverse.

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  12. Talk about SPACE - at this rate, _MW_ is going to have to switch to a _Family Circus_-style circular single-panel format just to accommodate Iris's GIGANTIC EXPANDING HEAD, which is now almost a perfect sphere. Or maybe she'll only be able to appear in the Sunday strips from now on? Definitely not enough space for her in a dinky little weekday strip.

    Michael Beaumier is right, it's got to be some kind of crazy anaphylactic reaction. I blame the lobster fried rice.

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  13. @Chester the dog, I think you mean Violet. Sadly, the girl that played her passed away this year. She was also on the TV show Dark Shadows.

    As for Iris, I wish Zak would stick a pin in her and see if she explodes.

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  14. I think Zak already did something like that. I also think she’s pregnant.

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  15. At least with her ever-ballooning head, Iris appears to have actually grown a nose.

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  16. Not the smart move Iris
    If you believe that idiot MD that you are healthy but menopause is to blame
    then simply tell Zak. Unless he wants to have children with you some day,
    then it won't matter. Somehow, all roads lead back to Wilbur

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  17. I'm with Meg! She's gonna break his heart, chuck him out and then have to track him down again when she discovers that doofy Doctor forgot to do an HCG.

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  18. SATURDAY

    I just asked my husband if he felt unduly burdened by my postmenopausal state. You should see the look he's giving me!

    HelenClark

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  19. “It’s not you, it’s me... [I never wanted to burden you, dear Zak.]” ARGH!!!!!!!!!!

    Tomorrow: Iris searches for an ice floe in Santa Royale Harbor on which she can drift away forever so as not to burden Boy Toy. BTW, are those ugly drapes just the thing with millennial millionaires? Not exactly Crate and Barrel merchandise.

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  20. I am really angry at this stupid strip right now. I was actually feeling pretty good about Zak. I mean, he may be a little clueless sometimes, but he was proving himself to be a stand-up guy. I guess he was too likable for the Worthiverse. And the whole interaction with the doctor, and the fact she just accepted it---ARRGGH! What is wrong with these people? Oh, right, their dialogue is written by Moy. Sheesh!

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  21. Surely Iris has seen post-menopausal women before and has noticed that the vast majority of them are not bald? And sure, some are fat, but no one healthy balloons up that much in a couple of weeks. Why wouldn't she go for a second medical opinion? The doctor she saw was obviously a hack. Losing huge chunks of hair isn't a sign of menopause. It often comes with low thyroid hormone, which is often easy to treat.

    In the end, I just hope she doesn't go back to Wilbur.

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  22. Get off the "low thyroid hormone" shtick. KM wouldn't get into the weeds about this. Menopause is the WORST thing that can happen to a woman. Arghhhh!!! Really, I would prefer that Iris and Estelle go off on a "Thelma and Louise" type adventure, minus the drive over a cliff...

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