Friday, November 5, 2021

Mary Worth 3761

I feel almost as if Karen Moy is pandering to her audience, knowing how much we love to see Wilbur suffer. But I don't think we have ever seen him suffer as much as we will. I am honestly looking forward to tomorrow again.

27 comments:

  1. Mary might want to be careful with the platitudes. Wilbur may express his emotions by getting liquored up and challenging Dr. Ed to a sing-off. Will Estelle then decide to leave with the winner?

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  2. I had the same thought as Thunderheels regarding Mary’s new platitude. If an irate person blows up and cusses out someone, irate person will then be “healed”? Where does that leave the cussee?

    I guess we can assume that these two couples are heading to the same karaoke joint (I suppose there’s only one in Santa Royale). I’m hoping that Dr. Jeff and Ashlee Jones are also there, having a bang-up time. This will be an opportunity for Mary to express her emotions - let the healing begin!

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  3. Things that will never happen....
    Seeing Estelle with another man, Wilbur tries to makes her jealous by making out with Mary.

    Yes, I know I'm a sick man.

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  4. Mr. Darcy,
    That would be epic! And disquieting. Who am I kidding? It would be puke-worthy.

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  5. Oh, c'mon! There's no way that Mary is not in on this! Estelle called Mary from the restaurant, asking her if she'd mind checking in on Libby because there was a good chance that ... ahem... Estelle might not make it home that night. She added that she and her new boyfriend, Dr Ed, were heading over to the karaoke joint. Naughty, Mary. Very naughty!

    HelenClark

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  6. Wilbur is in for yet another disappointment.

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  7. Meanwhile, Carol decides to just "try karaoke to see what Wilbur likes so much."

    Cut to: Trashlee versus Shauna Of The BrainDead version 2, Eshtelle and Carol punching each other to pieces over Weelbur! Ladies and gentlemen, place your bets now.

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  8. It will be interesting to see if Wilbur handles the karaoke situation with some of his notorious bad behavior, of the type he exhibited at the Thai place--I think it was on Main like so many of the SR hot spots--with Estelle, Iris, and Zack.

    Dr. Ed seems uptight, but maybe karaoke will bring out his livelier side.

    HelenClark, I think you may be right about Estelle and Mary being in cahoots. It may not be a collaboration of equals, though. As we all know, Mary is essentially evil, and Estelle is on the vulnerable side.

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  9. I have news for Mary.. Karaoke doesn't allow you to "express your emotions". It's a test of whether you can pull off mimicking some classic rock ballad without making a complete fool of yourself. One step above lip synching...

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  10. Oh yes, this is more than we could have hoped for!

    When Estelle sees Wilbur and Mary on a date, she's going to laugh herself sick. "Wilbur, is that the best you can do? And girl, what is wrong with you?"

    The next day, a deeply hungover Wilbur will begin referring to Mary as his ex.

    -- Scottie McW.

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  11. I think we should be thankful that KM has proven time and again that she doesn’t have much of an imagination. Otherwise she would have pulled us to edge of our seats today only to delightedly send us crashing to the floor tomorrow when it turns out that Estelle and Ed went to the other karaoke joint over in Goleta.

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  12. ...annnndddddd score!

    Meanwhile, Dawn, Entertainer Esme, Ted Confey, Chester The Dog, the bum with the shopping cart full of bottles and a few others all decide to try karaoke this evening...

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  13. BTW Mary, good thinking. Whenever a friend of mine who’s struggling with alcohol addiction tells me that he is considering picking up a drink, I too think it’s a great idea to suggest that we go to a bar.

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  14. Wilbur is going to start yowling when Dr. Ed and Estelle are singing together.

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  15. This combination of words has never been uttered by a human being in the history of human beings. Again.

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  16. Even if someone really liked singing, would they really list that as their first hobby when asked? Is "singing" a hobby? Does he collect books about singing? Does he have Precious Moments figurines in a case at home of people singing? That's weird. I'm betting Dr. Ed is a robot, sent back in time to kill Wilbur for no particular reason. Wilbur, get ready to belt out "Don't Go Breaking My Heart" one last time. Tonight you will be terminated.

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  17. Our ‘friends’ each take a turn on the karaoke stage.

    Mary: Come away with me, Lucille, in my Merry Oldsmobile
    Mary’s a Grand Old Name
    Wait ‘Til the Sun Shines, Nelly
    Bicycle Built for Two

    Dr. Ed: A Horse is a Horse
    If I Could Talk to the Animals
    Your Mutt is Preggers

    Estelle: I Love a Piano
    Theme from C*A*T*S
    My Heart Will Go On

    Wilbur: Jailhouse Rock (entire album)
    Wagner’s The Ring Saga (sings all the parts)
    Bye, Bye, Miss American Pie

    Restaurant Manager: Do you know it’s 2AM and this place closed at midnight?

    Wilbur: No, but if you’ll hum a few bars, I’ll fake it.

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  18. I think we now know Wilbur's true calling. Any woman who dates him finds true love after she dumps him.

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  19. Weelbur’s Karaoke song:

    When I find myself in times of trouble, Meddler Mary speaks to me
    Baking muffins full of tedium, “Splak it be”
    And in my hour of darkness, when I’m under Eshtelle’s balcony
    Holding the boom box on my head, “Splak it be.”

    Splak it be, splak it be,
    Muffins full of tedium, splak it be.

    And when the brokenhearted people living in Charterstone flee
    They have found the answer, run to sea
    For though they be forever parted, it’s still better that they will be
    Rather than meddled to their knees, no dignity.

    Splak it be, splak it be,
    Muffins full of tedium, splak it be.
    Splak it be, splak it be.
    There will be a meddle, splak it be.

    And when the shrubs are itchy, there are bugs that fall on me
    Zak and Irish snog together, splak it be.
    My shower radio makes some music, Meddler Mary smiles at me
    Speaking words I’ve come to dread, “Splak it be”

    Splak it be, splak it be, splak it be, yeah, splak it be
    Oh there will be a meddle, splak it be.

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  20. @tim Shanahan: I'm not sure whether you're referring to Mary's statement about emotions or Dr. Ed's claim about other interests, but I think you're right in either case.

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  21. Wanders, after seeing you write that you were honestly looking forward to tomorrow, I'm sorry to see your hopes were dashed by the fact that in MW land, tomorrow is always the same as today. With a Sunday retrospective coming up, to lower the bar a bit I am honestly looking forward to about 2 to 3 weeks from now when Mary will have finished her Sanka.

    Excellent song suggestions all! I for one am terribly afraid that two bars of the Pina Colada Song will send Estelle careening back into Wilbur's arms, but we can always hope.

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  22. SATURDAY

    “We’ll go to karaoke after dinner where you can throw it all up.”
    P.S. I think Mary is flirting with Wilbur in P2.

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  23. Wilbur will sing either "Friends in low places" or " Stand By Your Man"

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  24. Wilbur is going to sing What's New Pussycat to honor Libby.

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  25. Possible column ideas by Weelbur that were rejected:

    “I Shouldn’t Be Stalking My Ex Through The Shrubbery – But I Am!”

    “Everyone Has Endearing Quirks: These Are Mine!”

    “Magnetic Chicks, the Dog Way”

    “Fun Things To Do On Bogota Beach”

    “Karaoke Tunes To Lure Your Ex Back To You”

    “My Ex And I”

    and, of course

    “Singing In The Shower With Mayonnaise”

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  26. Sunday: Sure, he may not technically need a drink at the Karaoke bar, but the temptation will be there. Also, has any sober adult ever enjoyed Karaoke? Especially with Wilbur or Mary around.

    I wonder if Wilbur will bolt straight to the thinkin' and drinkin' cliff once he sees Estelle with a much superior man?

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  27. SUNDAY: That meal was supposed to be roast chicken and new potatoes? What did she do, run it through her trusty Ronco Veg-o-Matic before serving?

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