Mary Worth 3577

I love that Eve tries to justify Max's behavior with an explanation that in no way contributed to his fear of thunder or his decision to run out into it. No, Eve, he ran out into the thunder because he's a stupid dog. He saved your life "several times," and so you think he is a rational creature, but he's not. He's a dog. He got scared and made a stupid choice. The real question is, how did Gary fail to kill you over and over again?

Mary Worth 3576

Max, realizing that Charterstone is improperly grounded, is up on the roof with Mr. Allora installing a lightning rod in a thunderstorm. He has saved Eve's life once again.

Mary Worth 3575

Holy cow, that's quite a storm. Better not leave the door OPEN LIKE THAT! It would be horrible if one of your sofa pillows blew outside and GOT LOST!

Mary Worth 3574

Thunder sounds like gunshots? I don't know. Maybe we should make a scientific comparison...

Well, I'll be... they sound exactly the same!

Mary Worth 3573

This month, my wife and I have been watching all the Marvel Avengers movies in "time-line" order. We've always been a bit confused by the Avenger movies because we missed a few, but now everything is coming together for us. We are over halfway through, and we may even accomplish our goal to finish by the end of the month. We can LEARN FROM THE AVENGERS! One thing I've learned is that it doesn't hurt to repeat key plot points for those of us who missed something the first time. Mary Worth has learned this lesson well.

Mary Worth 3572

Yes! Max got his third dimension back and he is adorable!

I want to hear about all the times he saved Eve's life, though. Not just the one time he took the bullet. Like the time Gary tried to push Eve off the cliff, and Max caught her by the neckerchief but went over with her and cushioned Eve's impact by landing underneath her. Or the time Gary tried to run Eve over with his car, and Max shoved her out of the way and got run over. Or the time Gary tried to drop a giant anvil on her from the second story window, and Max caught it in his mouth and crushed his skull. You know, those times.

Live Stream with June Brigman

Today at noon eastern, June Brigman will be interviewed at Kennesaw State University where she teaches at the school of Art and Design. For those who missed, this link may work:

Mary Worth 3571

I'm still not used to Max's constantly shifting size, but now I just don't know what to think. Were his legs amputated? Was his third dimension extracted? How much more must this mutt endure?

Mary Worth 3570

If you were more like a dog, Eve, you wouldn't think about your murderous, tripping husband and cry all the time. Live in the now. Be like a dog.

Mary Worth 3569

Because vets never ask about how your dog got shot.

Mary Worth 3568

June, I'm not sure when Karen Moy sent you this dialogue, that she meant it literally. But thank you.

Mary Worth 3567

But what if The Now never ends?

Mary Worth 3566

Bad stories can be hard to escape as well. Fur-tunately, this isn't one of them. I'm raising the woof because this has been the ulti-mutt tail! I ruff it!

Mary Worth 3565

But have you found a dog therapist that Max is comfortable with?

Mary Worth 3564

Holy Faulkner! What the Hemmingway is wrong with these people?? Who talks like this? 

I think it's time for a Google Translate Turnaround. 

The languages I pick are: English to Finnish to French to English. 

 And the results are: 

Saul: Your apartment is plentiful everywhere for you and Max. 

Eve: We love our space. My husband had a lot of things, but penniless was not one of them. 

It isn't worse.

Mary Worth 3563

If you mix the salmon, carrots and chow up and bake it in a bread pan, you could bring it to the next pool party and call it "salmon carrot bread." I'm sure it will be a hit at the next pool party.

Speaking of pool parties... is it time for another one? Has this story ended? It seems like it is over. I for one, am ready to move on.

Mary Worth 3562

Beyond the confusion caused by Saul's pants saying that he's prepared salmon, and Eve's pants calling Max a girl, I want to better understand Santa Royale's obsession with salmon. It seems to be everywhere. It's almost as if there are just three food groups: Seafood, greasy diner food, and muffins.

Mary Worth 3561

That is true, Saul. Still, I liked you more when you were grumpy.

Mary Worth 3560

I woke up this morning and realized I hadn't even thought about Mary Worth for over 48 hours. I feel bad. But it was also a sweet relief. My emotions are complicated this week, but at least I'm not triggered by every man wearing a business suit. If I were, I would definitely stick to the woods on my walks.

One of the reasons I forgot about Mary Worth is because this came in the mail with art by June Brigman, and I am absolutely enthralled:

Mary Worth 3559

Speaking just for myself, I'm glad Gary Lourd is dead. And I cannot see him winning the Aldo Kelrast Memorial Award this year. I'm writing the Condo Board right now to make sure that doesn't happen.

Mary Worth 3558

I almost didn't recognize Eve without her nerkerchief. But this explains a lot. Ultimately, they end up beheading each other, but Eve is able to reattach her head using a scarf, which is why she always wears it now, and why headless manaquins make her cry.