Yes, Wilbur! Every dog owner is happy all the time. And they always find love. You should run down to the pet store right now and pick out a dog! They're lots of fun, and oh so easy!
(Please note: This is a joke. In no way do I condone casual and irresponsible dog ownership. I know some of you will find today's strip and my response triggering, so I just want to make that clear. Capisce?)
I wonder if Mary would be so nice to Wilbur if she knew he’d offered to wring Libby’s neck? On the other hand, she was quick to palm Libby off on Estelle as soon as Dr. Jeff pulled his phony allergy excuse, so her depth of feeling about the wonderfulness of pets may be pretty shallow.
I think KM's lazy handling of this subject is inexcusable. To hint that getting a dog would help the loutish, disgusting Wilbur get a girlfriend completely disregards the welfare of any unfortunate dog (or cat) that might be involved. Also, BTW, Mary has become nothing more than a muffin-baking idiot.
Mary’s conveniently omitting mention of the late Bella and her demise after eating some of Mary’s appetizers (was it salmon squares?) at a Charterstone pool party. That’s a sin of omission, Mary; boo on you. And why aren’t you eating your own muffins? Do you ever consume your own unappealing creations?
Working closely with a team of UCSR linguistics students (who are doing a work-study program in Nacogdoches), I've translated todays strip from Meddlese into English.
W: Mary, Ol' Man Wynter found happiness after getting a *DOG*?
M: *NO*! My having Bella cruelly poisoned brought out his compassionate side, *AND* my kidnapping him under false pretences got him out of his apartment! And my meddling led to him meeting Eve. What with his inexplicable mood swings and her strange crying jags and long response lags, they're a *GREAT COUPLE*!
W: Their neckwear certainly looked *WELL COORDINATED*. Hmm...
Good points, everyone, about Mary's questionable commitment to the responsibilities of caring for a pet. She manages to be MIA any time there's a problem with a pet but is always ready with advice about a quick replacement or the charms of companion animals. For Mary, pets and/or muffins fix all ills. Nice.
You know how it’s said that after enough time, people and their dogs start to look like each other? Well, Wilbur won’t have to wait long. At Animal Shelter, someone just abandoned a mixed breed: bulldog and Mexican hairless.
I've been sitting at the ole piano with my one-eyed companion animal and singing murder ballads (Libby's pick, the little rascal!) and something seems a little... awry. Maybe it's the Amazon package I just saw her hide in her kitty litter box. Or the mysterious charges on my credit card.
When I ask her what's up she just pats my cheek softly with her little paw and smiles in a a slightly scarier way than I remember when my lunatic ex-boyfriend was hanging around all the time. I'm pretty sure she's up to something... and I'm actually okay with it.
Don't be shy! I'd love to hear what you have to say about Mary Worth. Just keep it clean, that's all I ask. This is a FAMILY FRIENDLY blog. I don't want to moderate comments, but I will if I have to.
Saul and his previous dog never left the apartment. The smell was enough to make anybody grumpy.
ReplyDeleteI wonder if Mary would be so nice to Wilbur if she knew he’d offered to wring Libby’s neck? On the other hand, she was quick to palm Libby off on Estelle as soon as Dr. Jeff pulled his phony allergy excuse, so her depth of feeling about the wonderfulness of pets may be pretty shallow.
ReplyDeleteI think KM's lazy handling of this subject is inexcusable. To hint that getting a dog would help the loutish, disgusting Wilbur get a girlfriend completely disregards the welfare of any unfortunate dog (or cat) that might be involved. Also, BTW, Mary has become nothing more than a muffin-baking idiot.
ReplyDeleteMary’s conveniently omitting mention of the late Bella and her demise after eating some of Mary’s appetizers (was it salmon squares?) at a Charterstone pool party. That’s a sin of omission, Mary; boo on you. And why aren’t you eating your own muffins? Do you ever consume your own unappealing creations?
ReplyDeleteWorking closely with a team of UCSR linguistics students (who are doing a work-study program in Nacogdoches), I've translated todays strip from Meddlese into English.
ReplyDeleteW: Mary, Ol' Man Wynter found happiness after getting a *DOG*?
M: *NO*! My having Bella cruelly poisoned brought out his compassionate side, *AND* my kidnapping him under false pretences got him out of his apartment! And my meddling led to him meeting Eve. What with his inexplicable mood swings and her strange crying jags and long response lags, they're a *GREAT COUPLE*!
W: Their neckwear certainly looked *WELL COORDINATED*. Hmm...
Good points, everyone, about Mary's questionable commitment to the responsibilities of caring for a pet. She manages to be MIA any time there's a problem with a pet but is always ready with advice about a quick replacement or the charms of companion animals. For Mary, pets and/or muffins fix all ills. Nice.
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteWilbur sure looks happy gazing at that muffin. They make a great couple.
Until . . . you know.
-- Scottie McW.
You know how it’s said that after enough time, people and their dogs start to look like each other? Well, Wilbur won’t have to wait long. At Animal Shelter, someone just abandoned a mixed breed: bulldog and Mexican hairless.
ReplyDeleteHelenClark
Dear Wendy,
ReplyDeleteI've been sitting at the ole piano with my one-eyed companion animal and singing murder ballads (Libby's pick, the little rascal!) and something seems a little... awry. Maybe it's the Amazon package I just saw her hide in her kitty litter box. Or the mysterious charges on my credit card.
When I ask her what's up she just pats my cheek softly with her little paw and smiles in a a slightly scarier way than I remember when my lunatic ex-boyfriend was hanging around all the time. I'm pretty sure she's up to something... and I'm actually okay with it.
Signed,
I'd Move, Just Sayin'
I hope Wendy checks his mail before going to the puppy mill.
ReplyDeleteI liked Bella. If I recall, she knew exactly how to deal with Mary and Toby's meddling (which was to snarl at them).
ReplyDelete