Mary Worth 4074

"I love you too, Zak. But you're an idiot. I broke up with the last idiot I dated before he fell off a ship. Obviously, I've waited too long with you, but it's never too late."

Mary Worth 4073

God? God who?

Mary Worth 4072

Prayers offered yesterday, lead to miracles today. Or maybe tomorrow.

Mary Worth 4071

In addition to expressing your gratitude, you might also want to repent of all that fornicating you and Iris presumably have been doing.

Mary Worth 4070

God's kind of upset at you for rejecting his holy sacrament of marriage. Perhaps you should tell Zak that you will marry him now.

Since things are getting scary, I thought it might not be too early to roll in the Charterstone Halloween Party Jukebox. Enjoy!

Mary Worth 4069

There Zak goes again, thinking Iris is his mother.

Mary Worth 4068

Now, come on, Iris. What happened to "Together, we can do anything"? And all of your strength training? And especially, "Where you go, I go, Zak dear." That last one is the only foreshadowing I am still interested in.

Mary Worth 4067

He really is as stupid as Wilbur. Was. Was as stupid. Something tells me there isn't a cabana with a bar at the bottom of that cliff, however.

Mary Worth 4066

"ZAK! Your phone!!"

Mary Worth 4065

I bet his Nan never screamed at him like that. Take a chill pill, old lady.

Mary Worth 4064

What is this strange sensation? I'm feeling some sort of ... I don't know how to describe it... tension? Yes, that's it. I've never experienced this before, not in the 15 years I've been reading Mary Worth... I LIKE IT!!

Mary Worth 4063

How do I love thee? Let me condescend the ways.

Mary Worth 4062

Zak, the arrangement was that if Iris would go hiking with you, you'd stop asking her to marry you. Maybe you stop pushing your luck, okay?

Mary Worth 4061

Perhaps now is a good time to show some photos from the camping trip that Mrs. Wanders and I took in the Adirondack Mountains a few weeks ago. It was even more gorgeous than June's drawing.

This was taken at Death Brook Falls. We wondered why they call it Death Brook, and then, Mrs. Wanders, as she was walking across some slippery rocks beneath the falls... realized that her phone was no longer in her pocket. We soon found her new iPhone 13 Pro, gurgling at the bottom of the brook. But, the good news is that the phone did not die! Take that Death Brook!

Here are some more photos for your enjoyment:

Mary Worth 4060

So Picadee Falls is more than just a day trip? This is a weekend get-away, and it is starting to sound dangerous. Perhaps Zak is about to get killed off, and then won't Iris feel guilty about not marrying him!

Mary Worth 4059

Now that the relationship is on the rocks, passive aggression is perfectly appropriate.

Mary Worth 4058

Ooops... backtracking. Let's definitely stretch this out.... We need to go over it all again, at least to carry us through the Sunday strip.

Mary Worth 4057

Easily pacified, Zak has forgotten all about whatever it was he and Iris were talking about earlier, now that she's mentioned Piccadee Falls. What a good boy he is. His Nan always thought so.

Mary Worth 4056

More white rice and hamburger gravy is definitely in your future, Zak!

Mary Worth 4055

Iris, please make an honest man out of Zak. People are beginning to talk.

Mary Worth 4054

You guys started dating when Obama was still president, and have been committed to each other since Matt Lauer was fired for allegations of sexual misconduct. And this is the first time Iris's distaste for the institution of marriage has come up? You two seriously need to talk more... privately, please. Please talk privately.

Mary Worth 4053

Okay, Zak, let's see if we can make it simpler for you: When Iris says she's happy the way things are, she means that she feels a sense of joy and satisfaction with her present situation. She is implying that to make any changes to her current circumstances would diminish her level of personal satisfaction; and, in fact, even this discussion reduces her optimism about the future of your relationship. Did that help you find clarity?

Mary Worth 4052

"Let's keep things they way they are. Just think of me like I'm your former babysitter, Nan, who makes you white rice and gravy, just the way you like it. Isn't this wonderful?"

Mary Worth 4051

Zak, you idiot. It's Iris who is just fooling around with her boy toy. She never expected you to actually want to make a commitment!

Mary Worth 4050

"Your son can be my best man. Since Tommy and I are the same age, everyone will think we are friends."

Mary Worth 4049

Clearly, a marriage proposal is due. But until Zak actually takes a bite of Iris's allegedly-great white rice with hamburger gravy, I'm not sure they are ready for a real commitment.

Mary Worth 4048

Just in case anyone forgot, Zak is loaded. By the way.

Mary Worth 4047

"That's funny. I used to babysit a boy who called me Nan."

Mary Worth 4046

Be careful what you wish for; you might get white rice with hamburger gravy. Or Iris and Zak.

Mary Worth 4045

Everyone knows somebody like that. And they're always the worst person to have around.

Mary Worth 4044

Oh, Jeff. Mary Worth has NEVER negated the importance of what she does. The thought never even crossed her mind! Don't make me laugh.