Citizen Scottie McW rightfully accused me of abandoning ship yesterday. It was heartbreaking to be unable to post on such an historic day......

This seems to be more than a 'lurch.' Based on the angle of the horizon, that ship is going down. But given the image below, how...

As the star of the shipboard entertainment, Esme is probably aware of the extensive network of security cameras throughout the vessel. She...

Moy and Brigman do it again, establishing an entirely new genre: Comic Noir. Someone is going to commit a murder! My money is on Katie, an...

No... Katie would never suspect a thing. I mean she's only thrown him out of the apartment twice tonight, once for kissing Entertainer...

"My roommates and I have been looking for a fourth for Spades." So, let me see... Katie throws Derek out of their cabin and th...

"But Katie, I like kissing you more! Entertainer Esme tastes like cigarettes!"

"This isn't what it looks like. What I'm really doing is resisting the urge to smoke cigarettes!"

This cruise just keeps getting better and better for poor Katie. Kind of puts Derek's smoking into perspective, doesn't it?

Guys, if you're married, and you've gone out to a show, and you manage to ditch your wife to smoke cigarettes with the star, you...

Especially if your friend is a Marlboro cigarette. I really have no idea what Derek's motives are right now. I know he's struggl...

This is why there's a five drink minimum.

Well, Entertainer Esme has been outsmarted by the meddling of Mary Worth, and it probably won't be the last time, either. But maybe if...

Unfotunately, of the thousands of passengers enjoying this port of call, only Katie has to use the bathroom. It will be days before anyone...

I am not certain how Nobel Laureate and Holocaust survivor Elie Wiesel would feel about being quoted out of context in Mary Worth, but at ...

Woah, hey! What happened? How did these two end up alone together in the designated smoking area? This is bad, real bad. Derek is already ...

Because one thing every entertainer knows: They are irreplaceable. I mean, how could they ever find someone else to sing "At Last?...

What does Entertainer Esme mean by "I can have him?" Does she want to add him to her collection of top-hatted chorus boys? Does ...

  One of Entertainer Esme's best qualities is finding the silver lining in every situation, like  amusing herself at sea by planting see...

  Did I ever tell you about the time I saw Anything Goes? I had a business trip scheduled to New York City that I had to reschedule because ...