Thursday, July 29, 2021

Mary Worth 3698

Text dumped. It's okay... Shauna still loves you, Drew.

P.S., I came home from work late last night to discover I had forgotten to press "publish" on yesterday morning's post. Today is like a single admission double-header.

Wednesday, July 28, 2021

Mary Worth 3697

Great job offer out of town: Denny's in Keokuk.

More PayPal thank yous: Thank you to Cheryl and Buckley for their generous donations to the "Santa Royale Rehabilitation Fund." I'm sure Ashlee Jones will be rehabilitated in no time.

Tuesday, July 27, 2021

Mary Worth 3696

"Your kindness and compassion as a doctor inspire me to go to medical school. Please PayPal me $200,000 instead of five grand."

Sunday, July 25, 2021

Mary Worth 3695

Not only does this doctor walk his patients to the door, but he gives them $5,000 as well, thinks every patient in the waiting room.

Saturday, July 24, 2021

Mary Worth 3694

"Sometimes I get so caught up in my job that I totally forget what my job actually is. When my brain finally clears, I'm left wondering, why am I covered in blood, and whose body is that?" A great big thank you to Cheryl and Karen for your donations yesterday. They were very generous.

Friday, July 23, 2021

Mary Worth 3693

Psycho Ashlee is even more frightening than Violent Ashlee. Drew truly looks scared for his life.

By the way, you can PayPal me $5,000 right here, right now:

I will do my best to pay you back in laughs, eye rolls, and a special tote bag. Don't have $5,000? I will still do my best on the laughs and eye rolls. But for $5,000, you get a tote bag.

Wednesday, July 21, 2021

Mary Worth 3692

Perhaps a more accurate text should read, "Killed another patient today. Buried in paperwork. Don't barge in and swear at me."

Tuesday, July 20, 2021

Monday, July 19, 2021

Sunday, July 18, 2021

Mary Worth 3689

"It's five grand, five thousand clams, 50 Benjamins, quite a lot of moolah, five thousand smackers, a real bucket of samolians, five thousand smackaroonies... what I'm really trying to say is, it's a lot of bread. But I'm happy to lend you the dough so I can share you with the world."