Thursday, July 30, 2009

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Mary Worth 532

Yesterday, we learned that Charley, to his credit, doesn't like to hang out with children. In other words, even Charley has some boundaries.

Today, we learn that he likes to drink Scotch on the Rocks, the most vile of all beverages. And yet, women are magnetically drawn to him after they argue with their husbands. Let's hope Delilah comes to her senses before she does something she regrets, like stealing a coaster.

Today's Full Strip.

Monday, July 27, 2009

Mary Worth 531

I'm back from a wonderful vacation with my family. We visited relatives, which I usually don't refer to as "vacationing," but this was really nice. However, this past week has been extremely hard for Mary Worth:

Just look at her face! Mary has never been so depressed. Try as she might, she can't seem to take hold of Delilah's life; Delilah keeps insisting on working things out for herself.

Delilah, you fool! Don't you know what happens when you refuse to let Mary meddle? You end up standing inside the door frame of a villain from The Amazing Spider-Man without any perspective whatsoever.

Today's Full Strip.

Monday, July 20, 2009

On Vacation

Dear Reader,

I will be traveling this week, and do not expect to post. Heck, I may not even be able to read Mary Worth, which is killing me because I'm dying to know if Delilah calls Charley or not.

Respectfully, etc.


Sunday, July 19, 2009

Mary Worth 530

Poor Grandpa Lawrence. When little Delilah left him, there was no one to set his medication out in the little weekly S-M-T-W-T-F-S trays, and he's been taking way too much B12 this past week.

Excellent! Time to call Charley. This story is going to be excellent. I'm so excited to see the plot start to develop.

Today's Full Strip

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Mary Worth 529

I couldn't decide which panel in today's strip was more exciting: Mary Worth doing the lunch dishes, or Delilah working out her major life issues. So I included both (something I rarely do out of respect for King Features Syndicate licensee the Washington Post). I'm hopeful that tomorrow's Sunday strip will be nothing but Delilah walking by herself without any thought balloons. How awesome would that be?

Just remember, life is not about finding yourself, Delilah, but creating yourself. I read that on a sign at Barnes & Noble last night.

Friday, July 17, 2009

Mary Worth 528

Delilah Jonis: Today's Blackberry Calendar Entries

7 a.m. - Arise, fix toast & eggs. Eat breakfast with Mary Worth.
8 a.m. - Take walk with Mary.
9 a.m. - Have brunch with Mary Worth. Sandwiches.
10 a.m. - Take walk alone.
11 a.m. - Be present.
12 p.m. - Get call from Ol' Charley Smith. Lunch together.
1 p.m. - Take walk with Ol' Charley Smith.
2 p.m. - Cheese fries at bowling alley with Ol' Charley Smith. Bowl.
3 p.m. - Go for walk. Feel guilty about bowling with Ol' Charley Smith.
4 p.m. - Coffee at Mary's place.
5 p.m. - Get head together.
6 p.m. - Dinner with Mary Worth.
7 p.m. - Walk. Translate love into practical terms.
8 p.m. - Get clear with my own life. Coffee.
9 p.m. - Walk.
10 p.m. - Try to sleep. Miss Lawrence. Feel bad about bowling with Charley.

Today's Full Strip

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Mary Worth 527

"I can't answer that right now... I need to gorge myself on more food and then purge. Then I can answer you."

Didn't Delilah already explain what she wants? She wants to be a mother and she wants Lawrence not to travel so much. How complicated is that? It only gets complicated when she goes bowling with Charley on the side.

Today's Full Strip

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Mary Worth 526

And what better way to express love than with food? Nothing says "I care" more than eating a big breakfast at seven, followed two hours later by lunch.

Today's Full Strip

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Mary Worth 525

Delilah, no one mentioned anything about love. What I really want to know is how many refrigerators does Mary have? Because the last time I saw her refrigerator, it had a burro magnet on it. Oh, and no cabinetry around it... Maybe Toby Cameron re-did Mary's kitchen this morning while she and Delilah were taking their walk.

Today's Full Strip

Monday, July 13, 2009

Mary Worth 524

And that's just at Charterstone! Women find Charley Smith irresistible. He's so charming and so handsome that just to make eye contact is to fall under his hypnotic spell. He even wrote an ebook! (I was going to provide the link, but this is a family friendly blog.)

Today's Full Strip

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Mary Worth 523

I'd like to take a moment to admire Ol' Newsie Jones for keeping his eyes glued to the paper while Delilah traipses by dressed like the Queen of Sheba ready to rock and roll. Now there's a chap who cares about his Charterstone Reputation. And I shouldn't joke about that, because I really do admire that.

What is it about the name Charley and the use of the word "Ol'" in conjunction with it?

See how wide comics used to be? Those were the days! If you want to enjoy more classic Peanuts cartoons, which is my absolute favorite comic strip, especially anything before 1990, you can explore the complete archive here:

Today's Full Strip

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Mary Worth 522

"Delilah, does marriage mean nothing to you? When you choose to marry, you make a promise, a vow, an oath, a covenant to never sever that sacred bond of holy matrimony. You promise to love and cherish one another. To see one another through good times and bad. And you promise to forsake all others. This is exactly why Jeff Corey and I shall never wed!"

Gosh, how I hope she calls Charley. I hate to think this may be the last time we get to enjoy his company.

Today's Full Strip

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Mary Worth 521

Is that YOUR arm, dear reader, actually reaching into today's strip to soothe Mary Worth's rising storm of rage? I don't know how you've done it, but thank you. Otherwise, Mary might have actually butted in, and we all know how she hates to do that.

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Mary Worth 520

Charley Smith really is a clever lad. By complimenting Delilah's husband for being famous, he compliments Delilah, and at the same time shows he is not intimidated by her husband's fame. By asking if they are still together, he demonstrates good listening skills, acknowledging Delilah's recent revelation that she's spending the summer with Mary Worth. By asking for her number, he implies that he knows how to use a telephone. He's the total package.

Today's Full Strip.

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Mary Worth 519

Hey kids. Ethics quiz:

You and your husband have been married for several years. You both want children, but you feel that your husband's extensive travel schedule will leave you overly burdened as the sole caregiver. Do you:

A) Discuss your concerns with your husband?
B) Run off without explanation to get your "head together?"
C) Hook up with your drunken high school boyfriend and go bowling?

If you answered either B or C, you are an idiot.

Today's Full Strip

Monday, July 6, 2009

Mary Worth 518

This story just went from "Who cares? This story stinks." to "Who cares? This story smells awesome!"

Not since Ted Confey have we seen a man depicted so despicably. And, what, that was an entire one story ago. Of course, it's also been one whole story since we've seen a woman depicted so brainlessly as Delilah (Adrian). Stories about brainless females who hook up with creepy males never get stale.

But what makes this story especially fresh is everyone's 1972 fashion sense! I'm smelling Worthy Award nominations everywhere I sniff.

Today's Full Strip

Friday, July 3, 2009

Mary Worth 517

The truth is, the valley really isn't as awesome as everyone up here in the mountains thinks it is. Too many flash floods. And the banditos keep stealing the coffee shipments as they're brought in on the burros. I'd complain about the views only we have no windows. But at least we have silverware.

Today's Full Strip

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Mary Worth 515

Delilah is one of the most complicated characters ever to appear in this strip. She's so complex I don't have a clue what this story is about. Even legendary comic strip artist Joe Giella's valiant attempt to give me lots of new angles from which to ponder the plot are fruitless. I am just not sophisticated enough to understand such goings on.

Today's Full Strip