Saturday, December 31, 2011

Mary Worth 1,201 part 2

Also, if you separate them and it turns out she's not Emily Smith, you could be arrested for kidnapping when the police arrive.

This is really just a test post to see if I can post using my iPhone because I will be traveling all next week.

Mary Worth 1,201

Bill the Manager is gonna be steamed when he finds out that Bree the Waitress has been giving away free bowls of rainbow swirl ice cream.

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Friday, December 30, 2011

Mary Worth 1,200

McThuggy finally realizes why the "Good Eats" Diner's marketing slogan is "Where the *&^%$#@ is that waitress?"

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Thursday, December 29, 2011

Mary Worth 1,199

...she asks, holding her pad and pencil in her hand, staring out the window at the cars in the parking lot. Hmmm.

I love that Mary Worth's palette is so intense it cannot be contained by her scarf.

Hundreds have voted for the 2011 Mary Worth Worthy Awards. You have until December 31 to cast your vote!

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Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Saturday, December 24, 2011

Mary Worth 1,197


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Friday, December 23, 2011

Mary Worth 1,196

Either the waitress has brought a new place mat to Emily to color while she waits for dessert, or she's playing with leftover chicken fingers that look like actual fingers... cooool.

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Thursday, December 22, 2011

Mary Worth 1,195

Under distress, we can all say stupid things. McThuggy is older relative to whom? Emily? I should hope so. Mary Worth? I should hope not.

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Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Mary Worth 1,194

If McThuggy suddenly tries to leave, another stalling technique Bree can use is to wrap him up in her elastic arm and hold him until the police arrive.

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Mary Worth 1,193

"Rainbow Swirl, as in That's what your gonna see when I whack you on the back of the head with our industrial sized KitchenAid mixer."

Faithful reader "howardsgirlfriend" pointed out that our current story is ripped from the headlines in this 2005 CNN News article. It's really worth the read. Very touching.

Monday, December 19, 2011

Mary Worth 1,192

An old lady and a waitress fighting in Diner's parking lot aren't going to attract any attention. I'm sure McThuggy is thinking to himself, "This is a very fancy establishment. I wonder who works here?"

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Sunday, December 18, 2011

Mary Worth 1,191

Oh, wouldn't it just figure that Bree of all people is on duty now. Bree, Employee of the Month three months in a row for her swift and efficient customer service! This job would be much better suited for Gina or Allison, but alas, we have to settle for Bree. What a turn of events! How will she ever stall McThuggy and poor Emily Smith?

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Saturday, December 17, 2011

Mary Worth 1,190

Meanwhile, Bree's manager is making a phone call to the police, "Some old lady just kidnapped my waitress!"

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Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Mary Worth 1,189

Except for one obvious detail. Emily has long hair in the poster, and the girl in the diner has short hair. Duh. If the story of Gina and Bobby taught us anything, it's that no one ever cuts their hair in the Worthiverse.

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Tuesday, December 13, 2011

2011 Worthy Award Nominees

Yes, it's time to announce the nominees for the 2011 Worthy Awards. The Condo Board has finished its weeks-long deliberations and is thrilled with this year's slate. Your job, now, is to vote in each category to select the year's finest achievements. So cast your votes before the end of the year. Winners will be announced in early January.

And now, drum roll please. The nominees are:

To submit your vote, be sure to click the "Cast Your Vote" button at the bottom of each category's ballot.

Monday, December 12, 2011

Mary Worth 1,188

It looks like Mary and Bree have already found a booth to sit in and drink coffee while ignoring all the other customers. Things never change at Diner.

Saturday, December 10, 2011

Mary Worth 1,187

I know exactly how Mary Worth feels.

When I was a kid, I believed that Charles Schulz was was following me around, documenting my life. Frequently, I would open the funny pages to read Peanuts, and something would happen to Charlie Brown that had actually happened to me the previous day. I was terrible at baseball, but loved the game. I had a huge crush on a little red haired girl, but I couldn't speak to her. I never got Valentine's Day cards, and I was invited to parties only by mistake.

But as I grew older, I started to realize that it only felt that way. That actually, I wasn't Charlie Brown and that getting over my feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem was part of growing up. Charles Schulz couldn't possibly be following me around.

But then...

After Mrs. Wanders -- whose first name is Michelle -- and I got engaged, I took an internship in Washington D.C., and she remained in school in Cincinnati. We didn't have enough money to do much traveling back and forth, and in those days, you paid by the minute for long distance calls. So we wrote letters (I still have a box full of those letters).

I missed Michelle terribly. So imagine my surprise when I opened up the comics in the Washington Post and saw this!

Charles Schulz freaked me out again!

Countdown to Christmas with the Peanuts Gang at

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Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Mary Worth 1,186

"Plus, I'm cold. I could use a sweater. I wonder if there's a decent diner close by where I can get a warm meal and a free sweater."

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Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Mary Worth 1,185

I think I'm losing my memory. I can't remember the plot of this story. Can someone help me out?

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Monday, December 5, 2011

Mary Worth 1,184

Emily Smith. Ten. Blond. Blue eyes. Girl. There really aren't that many details to remember, so that's probably why you can remember them despite your dementia.

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Thursday, December 1, 2011

Mary Worth 1,182

You may think it's the tallest oven range in the world, but I believe the Tappan Fabulous 400 is bigger.

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