Sunday, May 24, 2009

Mary Worth 490

It's been a crazy week in Santa Royale, California, and when it was all said and done, I only had one thought: "I miss Ted."

The week began with the startling revelation that Mary is actually a walking, talking Winkie Doll™. Just pull her pearl necklace and she snoops.

A lot of readers speculated this week about the one-story Man Cabin's mysterious upstairs floor. Believe me, you don't want to know what goes on up there. But remember, Adrian is a doctor of sorts. The important thing is that Adrian has been so traumatized by Ted that she cannot speak, thus desperately trying to claim the privilege of opening the door by thinking as loudly as she can.

I must first credit dear reader pandagrandma with the wonderfully poignant comment: "I used to have a printer named Hewlett. I wonder if you're related..." We've all been eagerly awaiting this guy's pedigree. Thank you Karen Moy for making sure we understood that he was not some trust fund descendant of Bill Hewlett.

Upon learning of the death of Scott Hewlett's dad, Jeff can only utter one thing. I mean, it is the only thing anyone could say when learning of the death of someone's parent:


Jeff is doing a much better interrogation of Scott than he did of Ted. Or is he? Scott's con makes Ted look like a complete sucker. "Scott, I knew a wonderful man named Sam." "That was my dad's name!" "Did he go to Brockdale in 62?" "Of course!" "Gosh, he was great!" "Yes, salt of the earth." "I only want my daughter to date men who like pizza." "I love pizza!" Not really much different then "Would you make a pledge to Peace Village?" "What a coincidence: I already have!"

Well, if you say you're Sam Hewlett's son, you must be a great guy! No need for me to do a background check on you!

Wait a minute... I don't think Sam looks like Scott at all!

What I'm hoping is that after Adrian drives off with Scott, Jeff runs to the store for a can of Sanka and bumps into Sam Hewlett. Now that would make some mighty fine story telling.

56 comments:

Anonymous said...

I can't believe it. Dr. Jeff and I were classmates at Brockdale for awhile. I THOUGHT he looked familar. I knew a Jeff Corey back then, but no one called him Dr. Jeff, which is why I didn't suspect a thing, other than a coincidence. But now I see this is the same Jeff with whom I used to play "pins and pens", "noxious poisons", and "nom de Plume" at the junior prom. What a buncha carefree fellows we were.

Suppose the funniest thing we ever did was to slip in the classroom before class and use wood screws to prevent the teacher from opening her desk drawer. Jeff was taking shop at Brockdale and knew how to hide the wood screw heads by countersinking them and then covering the depression with a bit of wood putty. The teacher, a certain Miss Brondina Goldfarb, finally called in our principal, a cousin of Jeffs, to investigate. The principal, was also unsuccessful in opening the desk drawer, and wrote the maintenance department head, who too, when he showed up two days later, was equally unsuccessful at opening the desk drawer. Meanwhile, our 9 week grades, locked in the drawer, remained not posted.

A big to-do ensued, but no one in that class ever got their grades for that grading period. Some of us had Fs, including Jeff (this was a biology course), and had the grade been posted, he never would have been able to go to medical school. Funny how that one little incident has changed our world for us.

duckduckgoose said...

Why I follow Mary Worth and Me:
"Would you make a pledge to Peace Village?" "What a coincidence: I already have!" simply brilliant

hekates said...

"Why yes!" he grinned from ear to ear. "My father IS dead!"

Vicki said...

Most folks learn their "core values" at home from their parents, but good ol' Dr. Jeff learned his from his buddy Sam in High School! Better late than never, I guess.

Funny that while Scott was growing up he never heard stories or even a mention from his dad about this "great H.S. buddy I had named Jeff Corey." Must not have had a very big an impression on him, probably b/c the guy had no core values (yet).

Mary and Adrian look positively giddy with relief that Scott meets and exceeds all known standards! Yippy yay!!

duckduckgoose said...

As Jeff remembers just how close he was to Scott's dad, it becomes more of a curiosity that they lost touch after graduation, and that Jeff didn't know his buddy had passed away at an unusually young age.

I'm beginning to think that Scott was the kind of guy that would free Jeff from whatever locker or can he'd been stuffed into that day (probably right after thrusting panel 3's hand gesture into the face of a class jock). In any case, it would explain why the relationship meant a lot to Jeff, and not so much to Scott.

Chester the Dog said...

Jeff "thought balloons" in black and white, he dumps friends right after high school...why, the shallowness does pass from parent to child!

Vicki, thats not CORE values, but COREY values.

I need to head to the car to change clothes and hope this story is done when I get back.

Lets all raise a glass of Tang or Melmacware(tm) cup of Sanka, and hope for a less dull tomorrow!

Dinner at the Bum Boat is on me!

Tony said...

All Sam told Scott about his old high school buddy Jeff is that Jeff later had a weird daughter named, uh, Adrian.

Miss Emish said...

clam down ya'll. It's Hewlette saying he got his core values from ol' Sammy. The yellow and blue isn't very flattering, after all.

duckduckgoose said...

Smart of Adrian to be growing her hair out.

Vicki said...

And speaking of colors Miss Em...not to distract from this exciting plot, but is anyone else getting nauseated from the colors in Jeff's man cabin? He's got those awful pink curtains and pumpkin mustard-colored walls (he loved Mary's sofa so much he made a trip to SR's House Depot store for paint chips!) He even painted the ceiling pumpkin color, I see! Then you've got Adrian standing there in her maroon cow patch dress and Scott's suit and tie mistake, truly a nasty combination. My eyes, my eyes!!

djangosmom said...

Well, I don't about anyone else (yawn) but I am ready for a new story line.

Otismaximus said...

well this is all so nice. Guess officer Scott will take Adrian in the squad car up to Mt Pilot for some pie and coffee.They can share core values.

Vicki said...

Also, shouldn't Jeff or even Mary, be asking about Scott's mom? I mean, she may be an axe murderer for all we know! What REALLY happened to Scott's dad twenty years ago? Did he mysteriously disappear? Is there a specific reason Scott went into law enforcement?

duckduckgoose said...

... and is she remarried?

Chester (comatose) said...

Fact: Jeff decorated his man cabin with remnants from the House Depot.

Fact: Officer Redford is a dullard, but ready for a Playgirl spread.

Fact: I am bored with this LAW AND ORDER SANTA ROYALE story. It's time for a pool party!!!

Anonymous said...

Now that Adrian is as good as married off to Scott, attention can be turned to the next plot: how can Mary Worth continue her life of do-gooderness, meddling and volunteering at the hospital, if she's blind? I'm hoping that very soon one of those "doctors" she spends so much time with is going to notice that her eyeballs keep disappearing. Now, I'm not a professional, but surely that can't be good!

Vicki said...

Mary started out this conversation wearing her pearled Winkie doll costume, then at some point excused herself to change into the one she's now wearing. This begs the question--did she bring the outfit with her from home, or does she...ahem...always keep a few clothes at Jeff's place? *grins*

tuffenuf said...

I'm sorry, but my fantasyland-ometer is tapped out here. First, Jeff flashes gang signs at Det. Hewlett. Now, (5/25) we are supposed to believe that an officer of the law would keep both of his hands in his pockets when a complete stranger puts BOTH HANDS on his shoulders!!!???

And where are Mary's magic pearls?

Oh, and what about the $50G's?

Anonymous said...

Anyone remember the ultimate self-promoting fashion, Esprit? My wife once has a sweatshirt that had the brand name in enormous letters that wrapped from the front to the back, so from the front, all you saw was "ESP" (which were the old girl's initials before they became ESH), and RIT from the back. I see that Brockdale High School's athletic department beat the designers to the punch on that trick, judging from Jeff's flashback memory of Sam. Either that, or Brockdale High School fielded teams that competed under three-legged rules, so Sam wore the jersey that said "BROCK" and Jeff wore the jersey that said "DALE."

--wheelhead

tuffenuf said...

I thought that perhaps Sam's shirt said "Chippen"

duckduckgoose said...

Adrian's ring finger is dominating panel one today. She must have removed Ted's ring at some point, and the finger's getting itchy.

djangosmom said...

so which one is 'La Rosa' again? Is it the one with the kitchen/bathroom or the one with the snooty waiter? Oh wait, They all have the snooty waiter! Now I am back where I started. yikes

djangosmom said...

I wonder how Moy is going to end this thing? Do we have to keep watch Adrian go out on dates? Will she get engaged to Scott after only 3 dates like she did with Ted?

duckduckgoose said...

I'm hoping that Adrian and Scott sail off into the La Rosa sunset before Thursday.

Mary and Jeff ever so briefly (Friday and Saturday) discuss the two before they run into Ron Amalfi and Ella Byrd dining together at the Bum Boat.

Robert said...

With Mary's comment, "Like father, like son," does this mean a continuation of stories involving Coreys? Is Drew coming back from Vietnam? Or is this Moy's tedious way of allowing Mary to end a story she had very little to do with?

Vicki said...

Like father like son.
Like mother like daughter.
Like father like daughter.
Like mother like son.

Like Jeff like Mary.

And one more thing, that's sure some crazy HAND JIVE they've got going on there!

duckduckgoose said...

Sam Hewlett has grown from a "guy Jeff knew" to a teenaged lionhearted hero who's memory could monopolize Mary's entire evening. While the change from Adriancentric conversation could be welcome, I'm sure that she's anxious to move on to a more WORTH-Y focus.

But isn't Mary handling poor Jeff with grace?

Instead of saying, "Get your hands off the door, Dear; Adrian's drama is over."
she says, "Adrian is in good hands."

and instead of saying... "20 minutes with the man and we still know nothing about him." she says,
"If you liked the father, I'm sure you'll like the son."

Chester said...

Why does Brookdale High have OAL on their shirts? This must have really blown out the "Word o' Moy-Language(tm)" translator.


If Jeff was wearing the shirt, i'd think it meant "Only A Loser"

Vicki said...

Life CAN have "a strange way of working out", but only if you frequent the right restaurants (and drink bright red beverages, of course) in Santa Royale, Mary. Personally, I'd stay away from Golden Corridor.

duckduckgoose said...

Mary is uttering positive platitudes and the room is beginning to spin. It can't be long now!

Anonymous said...

Moy actually believes that the story thus far has made us care if
Adrian has a happy match. How pathetic is that?

Anonymous said...

As we already know that Adrian's dependence, incompetence, stupity and naivete are attractive only to scam artists and co-dependent fathers, there is no explanation for Scott's interest in Adrian except that he too is a scam artist but, unlike Ted, a good one. Plus he is not cursed with the tell tale Snidley Whiplash mustache. Scott can see a good mark when he sees one. A detective's salary doesn't compare to a doctor's, especially one who can drop 50k without blinking. Now that he has manipulated Mary and Jeff, he's home free. I so hope Scott is up to no good because Moy has made Adrian so unattractive that I want her to SUFFER!!!! But no, Moy will wrap up Scott and Adrian with a lovely pink bow and move on to a new, certain to be sophomoric, story line.

duckduckgoose said...

The Hewlett family was known for their charity work. I still think that Sam's entire relationship with Jeff involved his repeatedly rescuing the poor guy from his locker.

Flash forward to Scott, the man who has been "helping" Adrian since she was taken in by Ted. Why the attraction? He could be the son of a codependent. Does he display an overdeveloped sense of responsibility? Might he have difficulty setting boundaries? Is his attitude self-righteous and perfect? Only time will tell.

No pink bow on this story line, Anonymous, rest assured, Adrian could still SUFFER in her relationship, just like her father does in his.

Chester the Dog said...

Life CAN have "a strange way of working out", but only if....

You threw rocks at geese as a child,

You have a fake staircase in your ranch house,

You pick up dogs on New Country Road,

You tile your kitchen on a whim,

You love a good Scotland DVD,

You live out of your car,

Your briefcace is made of cement,

Your dead wife is named Lydia and is not dead,

And, you have to work as a waiter at 2 different restaurants, just to maie ends meet.

Ahh, i feel the goosebumps coming on. Thanks Moy!

Anonymous said...

Scott inherited his looks and voice, core values and beliefs from his father alone.
Wanders is right; there are no mothers in Santa Royale.

Numbat said...

I can see now what is going to happen. Everything will go along absolutely swimmingly for Adrian and Scott until they set off for their honeymoon.

Unfortunately, due to reasons seemingly inexplicable, they shall choose to embark upon this journey into their new life together in Adrian's steering wheel-less car. As a result the first decent curve on the hillside road abbreviates their journey in life to nothing more than a footnote in the journals of Mary.

And that's how Mary wants it. The clues have been there all along for those not blinded by the garish colours of Dr Jeff's man cabin. For the longer that Mary was not in the spotlight, the more her concentration slipped and her features contorted - revealing that which really lay beneath. And it was not a pretty sight, ladies and gentlemen.

Be very afraid. I know I am.

Otismaximus said...

For Pete's sakes! In todays strip Adrain has reached an even lower level of pathetic. I think the waiter is so sickened by her desperation that he turned away from the table and is just standing there facing the wall. He's probably trying to decide if he will dash his head against it or not.

Debby Boone fan said...

What the heck happened to Scotts face in panel one of the 5/29 strip? Yikes. Officer Redford is a changeling!

It also looks like he stole Adrians yellow bracelet.

And poor Waiter McSnooty cannot bear to see this silliness, as he turns away is disgust. He should have taken the afternoon shift at the Golden Corridor instead.

duckduckgoose said...

Go ahead, Scott, tell her that you'll treat her like a QUEEN.

Robert said...

Everyone's missed the real action in today's panels; the "whooshing" motion of Scott grabbing the check before Adrian can get it. I need to sit a spell, I don't know if I can handle action more stimulating than that.

duckduckgoose said...

Not the most sophisticated method of spiriting away the check, but Scott's channeling either Paul Lynde or Charles Nelson Reilly in that panel, which explains the exaggerated action and the laughing that's going on in the background.

Vicki said...

Wow, Adrian, that is so rare for a man to invite a lady to a fancy restaurant, and then insist on picking up the tab! (And esp. with you being so wealthy and a DOCTOR and all!) What a keeper. Scott has "solid core values", fer sure.
A warning though...If McSnooty had happened to see that tiddlywinks tomfoolery you did with the tab, he would have tossed you both out on your ears!
C'mon, Adrian, La Rosa is a CLASSY place!!! If you're going to act that foolish, go to the Bum Boat already!

Anonymous said...

Adrian is accustomed to picking up the check as that is the only way thus far that she has been able to entice men to dine with her. Being a detective, Scott should have sensed this and been a little slower in grabbing for the tab. Which is one more reason to suspect Scott's motives. I mean, there is no way that a anyone could possibly be attracted to such a twit.

NoPinkBow said...

CO - DE - PEND - ENT the whole lot of them!

djangosmom said...

Thank you NoPink, that is what I thought this whole story line.

djangosmom said...

That Jeff! He is such a MAN!
He totally forgets how he was taken in by the huge sum that Ted pledged to the Village.

djangosmom said...

And I also noticed that today Jeff's shirt is white. On Thursday it was gray. He must have spilled his Tang and gone out to his car (where the Coreys keep their clothes)for a spare.
And the fish smile down from the walls like the eyes of Dr. T.J. Eckleburg.

duckduckgoose said...

Whole lotta people staring at walls this week.

duckduckgoose said...

Mary has given up on the evening and is now just patronizing Jeff. She's got to be thinking, "Oh, Dear, you couldn't be more correct, TED was NOT the fool in this story line."

Or is she just staring past him, at the wall?

Anonymous said...

Dr. Jeff's recently revived memories from Chip & Dale High School (his nerdiness, his being stuffed in a locker every day, etc.) has made him admit to himself--secretly, or course--that he rather ADMIRES reckless, bad-boy Ted. "He's no fool, he's so COOL!" How else do you explain his little smile there in panel one?

Robert said...

I love how the conclusion to the Adrian saga is that: "It's better to have been in a bad relationship with a conman, because that might lead to a happy ending with a detective!" Ladies, know your place! Hang on in there with a rotten boyfriend, because a nice one may come along and rescue you! What year is it, 2009? Silly readers, it's 1957!

pink cupcakes said...

Given the marytriarchal structure of Santa Royale society, it's been refreshing to watch Jeff, Scott, Sam's memory, and Jeff's finger all demonstrate such formidably masculine and powerful traits for a change.

If they want to drag Adrian, by her inky black hair, off to their man cabins, I say, let them.

Vicki said...

Robert, I do hope Lydia and Queenie Gomez (I LOVE that name, lol!) have been rescued by their knights in shining armor, too! It would be such a shame if Adrian was the ONLY lucky one! For being such a bubblehead, that gal leads a pretty charmed life.

Vicki said...

"MARY-triarchal" society-- now that's funny, pink cupcakes!!

Robert said...

And isn't it sweet how the conclusion to today's Sunday strip shows Adrian and Scott sharing ice cream after their dinner date. I'm guessing Scott jumped forward and picked up the tab on those, too. Hey, big spender!

duckduckgoose said...

Jeff gains 6 inches in height and a trim waistline when he's walking outside of the Bum Boat. He looks positively dashing... but continues to discuss his daughter!

Desperate, Mary has resorted to fatalism. If the subject isn't changed soon, someone is going off of the pier.