Whatever you do, don't call an ambulance to check her out for water in her lungs, or possible brain damage. They might take her to the hospital and who would be there waiting for her? Dr. Kapuht. And as everybody knows, he's a bad doctor.
Tuesday, July 29, 2014
Actually, Olive, Mary couldn't hear you because you were underwater. Every time you called out to her, your lungs filled with more water, and within minutes you were unconscious. As soon as Mary gets you out of the pool, she will try to administer mouth-to-mouth resuscitation in a desperate attempt to get you to start breathing again. Let's hope for the best. I'm sure you'll be fine.
Sunday, July 27, 2014
Just click on the image above to get the full size version, and save it as your Facebook cover photo.
Everyone who guessed that Olive would hide in the pool, please submit your Charterstone Jukebox nominations to the Condo Board. Remember, the Condo Board Jukebox Committee has final determination of approved selections. And congratulations everyone. Because I think everyone was a winner on this one.
Labels: Mary Worth
Friday, July 25, 2014
Thursday, July 24, 2014
Wednesday, July 23, 2014
January 3, 2007
Dear Charterstone Residents,
In an effort to keep fees to a minimum, we are pleased to announce that the Condo Board has unanimously decided not to install a safety fence around the Charterstone pool in complete disregard for the Swimming Pool Safety Act of the California Health and Safety Code.
In addition to saving the landlord money, there are several additional benefits to this smart decision: 1) Easy access for carrying large pink cakes to pool parties.
We hope you are pleased with our leadership and wisdom.
The Condo Board
Tuesday, July 22, 2014
Monday, July 21, 2014
This reminds me of a funny story. My friend's sister, Nicole, was babysitting my sister, Kristen, and they decided to play Hide-and-Seek. I don't know how little my sister was at the time. Maybe five. She didn't know that when they call out "Olly Olly All Come Free," you reveal yourself and you win. She hid herself very well, and the distressed babysitter had to call her entire family over to the house, and when they couldn't find her, they were panicked enough to call the police. There were sirens in the front yard, so finally Kris came out to see what all the commotion was about.
Olive, may I recommend lying on top of the narrow wall mounted space heater underneath the coffee table? That way, anytime anyone looks under the coffee table, you'll be up off the floor high enough that they won't see you unless they actually get down on the floor and look up. And trust me, if a panicked babysitter can't find you when she's really trying, your disinterested parents may not even notice you are missing. I'm sure they'll appreciate the extra hour of quiet in the morning.
Hey! Let's have a Not-a-Real-Contest contest: Whoever guesses where Olive ends up hiding gets to nominate a jukebox song to the Condo Board!
Saturday, July 19, 2014
Thursday, July 17, 2014
As I was coming out of anesthesia yesterday, one of my doctors came to check on me. I was really groggy, but I kid you not: He said the operation went "easy-peasy." I'm sure I looked thunderstruck... just like little Olive did yesterday. I wondered if I had hallucinated it, so I asked him, "What did you say? Did you say easy-peasy?" He said yes. I told him to go read Mary Worth.
Thank you so much all for your well wishes and prayers. The doctors are going to do a thorough analysis of the mass they removed because it wasn't quite what they expected, but it shouldn't be anything terrible. Who would have guessed that I would find such support among Mary Worth fans. I await your tuna casseroles and soup tureens.