Thursday, December 31, 2015

Mary Worth 2222

Mary teaches an important lesson here: No matter how good we think we are, there is always room to think we are better.

Today's full strip

Wednesday, December 30, 2015

Mary Worth 2221

Let's resolve to develop a plot in 2016. Olive, you used to be fun, with the flower fairies, guardian angels, midnight drownings and heroin addicted surgeons. Now it's just one big sanctimonious stroll around Manhattan. I'm glad you're both enjoying your time together, but I'm about ready to see what's going on at Apartment 3-G. I'm sure it is more exciting than this.

Today's full strip

Sunday, December 27, 2015

Mary Worth 2220

For those of you who don't have access to the Sunday splash panel, I wanted to make sure you saw this. You can thank me later.

I'm not sure a house guest and your child on the balcony outside that sliding glass door constitute privacy. But, hey, if you're comfortable, go for it.

Today's full strip

Friday, December 25, 2015

Mary Worth 2219

After all the planning and early preparations, I think we were all expecting something a little more appetizing than turkey and booze. The dinner may not be much, but it's still the sexiest Christmas greeting ever.

Thursday, December 24, 2015

Mary Worth 2218

This Mary Worth Christmas story is a delight, casting images of Evy and Tee-Hee Eddie to the dim, peripheral corners of our mind, then offering prayers in church for loved ones far and near. I'm going to stop worrying about the turkey they cooked the day before Christmas dinner, and just wish everyone here a very merry holiday! Thank you for your kindness and support of this blog, and to those of you who recently made donations, I thank you as well. I'm going to use those gifts to donate to a family of one of my employees who had a house fire two weeks ago, and are now living in a hotel. I hope you find joy in the peace of this season and the coming year.

Wednesday, December 23, 2015

Mary Worth 2217

How condemned will Tee-Hee Eddie feel when Mary Worth comes knocking on the door to ask if she can take Olive to church!

I can't wait to hear Eddy holler from behind closed doors, "Mary, we don't care where you take Olive, or what religion you are! You know that. We will see you later."

Today's full strip

Monday, December 21, 2015

Mary Worth 2215

And Ed and Evy have decided to wear the same pair of pants. Cut down on the eggnog, kids.

Today's full strip

Mary Worth 2214

Yesterday's FREE secret message complimented Joe Giella on his portrayal of a New York City Market. Sigh

Saturday, December 19, 2015

Mary Worth 2213

In the end, it means Olive is ripe when she completely gives in to the will of Mary. Whoops, my mistake, she's practically rotten!

Today's full strip

Friday, December 18, 2015

Thursday, December 17, 2015

Mary Worth 2211

Ed's expression says it all: "We must put an end to Mary's influence on our daughter. Chefs only make $40k a year. She'll be a doctor's wife like her mother, and she'll like it."

Today's full strip

Tuesday, December 15, 2015

Mary Worth 2210

Artist Joe Giella is 87, but his joie de vivre is still abundant and a bit mischievous. Thank you Uncle Joe for this special Christmas gift. Let me give you a hand. Oh, I see you already have plenty!

Today's full strip

Monday, December 14, 2015

Mary Worth 2209

There's more coming up! I'll definitely stay tuned. I'd been planning an expensive NYC trip with my family this Christmas, but now I don't have to! This has been even better than the real thing.

Today's full strip

Saturday, December 12, 2015

Mary Worth 2208

"You get me, Mary... wait. What? You think my supernatural experiences are imaginary? You don't believe I really see angels and flower fairies? You're no better than my pathetic parents. You're dead to me, Mary. Dead to me."

Today's full strip

Friday, December 11, 2015

Mary Worth 2207

Talk about insensitive, Mary you're talking right in front of that guy's face. That is, if he even has a face.

Today's full strip

Thursday, December 10, 2015

Mary Worth 2206


Olive, Mathilda is a fictional character, so yes, you are alone. Also, this may come as a surprise, but you are a fictional character too. You don't even exist. Hopelessly alone forever. If "nothing" can even be alone.  

As everyone strikes the anjali mudra pose, I can't help but feel this is the most uptight yoga class I've ever seen. 

Wednesday, December 9, 2015

Mary Worth 2205

Okay, can we just establish the fact that Mary and Olive ALWAYS know what each other means. There's no reason to say, "I know what you mean." Even though neither of them can verbalize the deep feelings and insights they experience at the world around them, it doesn't matter because the other will clearly understand. In fact, words don't need to be said at all. These two can just hang out together in complete silence, glancing at each other knowingly.

Today's full strip

Monday, December 7, 2015

Mary Worth 2203

I've learned a lot too, we all have, but I can't figure out how the sun is casting the shadow of the window pane on the inside of the curtains.

Today's full strip

Friday, December 4, 2015

Mary Worth 2202

It appears that the velociraptor has indeed become animate and is grabbing its first victims. Quick. Protect yourselves.

I must say, yesterday's comments had me chuckling outloud. All were hilarious, but I hope you sung Fauxprof's song outloud.

Today's full strip

Thursday, December 3, 2015

Mary Worth 2201

Yes, it could happen again. An asteroid could hit the earth at any moment. It is definitely something to lie awake at night and worry about.

Today's full strip

Wednesday, December 2, 2015

Mary Worth 2200

Olive, people are going to hate you because of your special powers. The time is now. Seek vengeance while you can. Levitate yourself and lead these inanimate objects to reign horror on the torpid bourgeoisie of Manhattan!

Today's full strip

Tuesday, December 1, 2015

Mary Worth 2199

Hey! She's right! There are four floors, and the dinosaurs are on the top floor! I feel like I'm getting a real life tour of New York from a real life New Yorker!

Today's full strip

Monday, November 30, 2015

Mary Worth 2198

This should be a wonderful next few weeks, full of wonderment and wonderlous wonders. I wonder if our wonderful wonderers will wonder about wondering at a wonderlicious Broadway wonder like Kinky Boots.

Friday, November 27, 2015

Thursday, November 26, 2015

Mary Worth 2196

I am thankful for today's classic dialog. The fact that Mary is in New York City for the sole purpose of spending time with Olive, and even living with her, makes today's Moyisms even more Moyish than usual. I love that they are actually already on a local outing when she asks. I am excited by the vagueness of the number of weekends Mary plans to stay, and the suggestion that Mary plans to spend every moment Olive is out of school on the town with her.

Just for fun, I ran Mary's sentence through Google Translate a few times and then back into English, and it came up with, "Olive, what should we do for fun while I'm visiting you?"

Two years ago, on Thanksgiving, Mary was also in New York City, enjoying her post-mugging lunch:

It reminds me that I never reported on my experience in our local community production of Footloose. I'll just say, it was a defining role for me, and truthfully, the time of my life. So glad I let my neighbor convince me to audition, even though I hadn't done anything like it for 18 years. Now I can't wait to do it again!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

Wednesday, November 25, 2015

Mary Worth 2195

"The last time I was in Central Park, I was mugged. Let's revisit it. But with you, Olive, and your SPECIAL GIFTS, I feel so much safer."

Today's full strip

Tuesday, November 24, 2015

Mary Worth 2194

We all could use a little Mary in our lives. She helps us do our best and makes us feel better. And children are naturally drawn to her... or unnaturally.

Monday, November 23, 2015

Mary Worth 2193

I can certainly see why Olive invited Mary to come visit her: She always lets her order extra platitudes on her sundae.

Today's full strip

Tuesday, November 17, 2015

Mary Worth 2190

"Speaking of local hot spots, we would love to take you and Olive out to A Local Hot Spot for dinner tonight. No wait, I meant Eddy and I are going to A Local Hot Spot, and would love to give you and Olive some alone time in our moneyed apartment. Get used to it, dear lady"

Today's full strip

Monday, November 16, 2015

Mary Worth 2189

Oh, look, what's-her-name forgot what's-her-face's name. But that little kid remembers because she has a second tummy in her brain. Er, brain in her tummy.

Sunday, November 15, 2015

Mary Worth 2188

Instead of a tip, Mary takes the cell phone away from our concrete cabby.

Friday, November 13, 2015

Mary Worth 2187

The taxi driver who indelicately comments on your friends' wealth always deserves a little extra in his tip.

Today's full strip

Thursday, November 12, 2015

Mary Worth 2186

Has there ever been a more pitiable character than Turban Taxi Driver? His look of abject suffering says it all, "This is the longest fare of my life, but the meter isn't keeping pace. Somebody get me out of this cab!"

Today's full strip

Wednesday, November 11, 2015

Mary Worth 2185

So, what have I taken away from all this? Apparently, Heloise is polite. This story has made me a better person. Thank you.

Today's full strip

Monday, November 9, 2015

Mary Worth 2184

Well, at long last our Mary Worth/Phantom cross-over comes to a close. What an exciting week it has been. I thoroughly enjoyed the creative shared experience of Mary and Heloise. How fun it was for me to meet a character from a comic strip that I don't care about.

Today's full strip

Friday, November 6, 2015

Mary Worth 2183

While Mary Worth continues to chat delightfully about the essential joys of human interaction, the "Phantom" has apparently grown bored with this Rashomon story and returned to its previously scheduled programming, which will no doubt feature human interaction of a different sort.

Today's full strip

Thursday, November 5, 2015

Mary Worth 2182

This cross-over story is as pointless as actually getting to know someone you are sharing a cab with in Manhattan.

Today's full strip

Wednesday, November 4, 2015

Mary Worth 2181

I knew this was going to be a cross-over story, but I didn't know there would be actual cross-dressing!

Today's full strip

Tuesday, November 3, 2015

Mary Worth 2180

Well, today is the day that the entire Worthiverse has been waiting for. It was recently leaked that there would be a Mary Worth crossover with another comic strip, and today we learn it is the Phantom!

Of course, I don't read the Phantom, so I really could not care less.

Monday, November 2, 2015

Mary Worth 2179

"You are Mary Worth, right? I dreamed last night that I was to text a remarkable child named Olive when I picked you up, and let her know you are on your way."

Sunday, November 1, 2015

Mary Worth 2178

True. That's why I keep a list on the right column of this blog.

Saturday, October 31, 2015

Mary Worth 2177

I know, Mary. Right? Things are really moving along. But don't worry everyone, this story will slow down and we will all be able to relax.

For those of you who remember I'm in a play, we opened last night and it was pretty nerve racking for me. But I had a blast, and if you're in the Montgomery County, Maryland area, you can get ticket information here. I will be played by Ken Kensington.

Today's full strip

Friday, October 30, 2015

Mary Worth 2176

To avoid long-term parking fees, Mary carefully hides her car near the runway.

Today's full strip

Thursday, October 29, 2015