Thursday, December 24, 2015

Mary Worth 2218

This Mary Worth Christmas story is a delight, casting images of Evy and Tee-Hee Eddie to the dim, peripheral corners of our mind, then offering prayers in church for loved ones far and near. I'm going to stop worrying about the turkey they cooked the day before Christmas dinner, and just wish everyone here a very merry holiday! Thank you for your kindness and support of this blog, and to those of you who recently made donations, I thank you as well. I'm going to use those gifts to donate to a family of one of my employees who had a house fire two weeks ago, and are now living in a hotel. I hope you find joy in the peace of this season and the coming year.


Doodle Bean said...

Happy Holidays, Everyone!!

Sandi Ego said...

Would love it if Evy & Tee Hee Eddie are actually Jewish and are just trying to be polite with all the Mary Christmas frenzy.
Thank you, Wanders, for the year-round gift of this blog. From your hidden messages and juste mot captions to all the hilarious comments, it's a treasure.
Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year in the Worthiverse to all!

fauxprof said...

Merry Christmas Morning, Worthiversians. After galumphing along in the footsteps of my heroes, Tom Lehrer, Allan Sherman, the Smothers Brothers and Wierd Al Yankovic, here's a slightly warped present, good until Epiphany...

We three Taylors, Central Park West
As a family, we're not the best
Folks neglectful, kid respectful
Let us exploit our guest.

Oh, lovely lady, Mary Worth
Fix our dinner, bring us mirth
Watch our kid, dear, until New Year
So we can have some peace on earth.

I am Eddie, Doctor supreme
Father wise, I am no child's dream
Seldom pleasant, rarely present
Never part of the theme.

Tee-Hee Evy, bland trophy wife
Motherhood is nothing but strife
Don't like cooking, and I'm looking
For a more leisured life.

My name's Olive, my tummy brain
Knows my parents find me a pain
When Mary goes away, let me stow away
To Charterstone on her plane.

Mary Worth, your duty's clear
Bring this child some lasting cheer
My suggestion, don't ask questions
Get Olive out of here.

Have a wonderful day, everybody!

KitKat said...

Bravo, @fauxprof! This is brilliant - you described the Taylors and Mary to a T. I was singing right along. (Might I suggest the inclusion of the matchless Stan Freberg in your Hall of Fame? We lost that witty genius this year.)

On to the Christmas feast. Is it just that turkey that's been roasting for two days, plus the green blobs that surround it? (They look like super-sized stuffed olives, which fits right in with Olive.) And, judging by the glasses raised in the toast, Mary is the only one hitting the vino. I don't blame her - I'd need my own bottle (maybe two) if I was spending Christmas with this family.

I AM disappointed Mary hasn't contacted her NY friends: Dear Old Shelly Cohen, John Dill, and Ken Kensington.

Happy Christmas, everyone!

Robb said...

Don't forget Gina the waitress, too. I'm surprised Mary hasn't visited her and Bobby Black. Hmmm. Maybe Mary can broker a deal for Olive to go live with Gina and Bobby.

Sandi Ego said...

@fauxprof, that's wonderful! I, too, sang along. I enjoy writing parody songs & am a stickler for proper meter & number of syllables. You nailed it, along with clever phrasing. Thank you for creating & sharing with us.

Petunia said...

Is Olive related to Marty Feldman?

Merry Christmas, Wanders, and to all of the readers and commenters on the blog!