I hope that's a rhetorical thought balloon because I'm older than you are, Iris, and I'm not going to be much help. But one thing's for sure, your choice at this moment will determine how Zak's friends judge you. And while Tommy's approval is completely irrelevant, the approval of Zak's friends is going to be paramount.
Wednesday, December 28, 2016
If it isn't a real band, then it must be an anagram, but I can't figure it out, although I do see the word "aging" in there. And it would make sense that it's a band for an aging audience if they start playing at 6:30. Iris will be sound asleep by nine.
Tuesday, December 27, 2016
Monday, December 26, 2016
You may find this hard to believe since I write such a hip-hop-happinin' blog, but I have a little trouble keeping up with the way kids are talking these days. Their slang baffles me. To me, when someone says you're eyes are bright today, it means they suspect you of being one of these:
Sunday, December 25, 2016
Of all the wonderment in today's Christmas celebration at Charterstone, this little party is the one I think we're most eager to attend. Tommy has now met his future father-in-law, and seems overjoyed that Wilbur is out of the picture. He even put on a clean T-shirt for their Christmas dinner out on the town just to impress Zak. And Zak, whose parents live over 60 miles away (!), told his Mom he couldn't be home for Christmas because he was spending it with his new girlfriend. "I think she went to high school with you, Mom." And Iris is totally enjoying that champagne, and super proud of Tommy for not drinking in front of her. And Waiter McStilty is awesome as well, maintaining that game face while inside he's smoldering with resentment over having to work on Christmas at less than minimum wage plus tips. Merry Christmas, one and all, and God bless us, every one.
P.S. Just a few more hours to vote for your favorites in this year's Worthy Awards!
Saturday, December 24, 2016
Actually, Wilbur, you're not. You're in the southern hemisphere, the exact opposite sky. In fact, the sun won't set in Antarctica (nerd alert!) until March 21. So, it looks like our little "Where's Wilbur" game is still in play. The Dharma Initiative has dumped him somewhere, and not even Wilbur knows where.
Friday, December 23, 2016
Thursday, December 22, 2016
Yesterday's game of "Where's Wilbur" was fun, but apparently irrelevant. The only thing that matters is that he is in a metal room without any heat, but very good wifi. Now to impress Iris on Skype. Just wait till she sees his jowl stubble.
There's still a few more days to vote in for your favorites in this year's Worthy Awards. Your vote could make the difference!
Wednesday, December 21, 2016
Whoa! Wilburana Jones! He's a new man! Oh, if Iris could only see him now. It's too bad she didn't travel the world with him. No doubt this new virility would more than compensate for Siberia's sub-zero temperatures and living in a steel bunker so cold that ice forms on the walls and you have to wear a parka. Good wi-fi though.
Tuesday, December 20, 2016
Monday, December 19, 2016
Their hands keep awkwardly brushing against each other. If I know Zak, he'll be holding her hand in no time. And all the people on the busy streets of Santa Royale will sigh, "Awww, isn't that sweet? That man is holding his mother's hand at Christmas."
Saturday, December 17, 2016
Voting is open to every man, woman, and child, regardless or race, religion or national origin. I'm talking to you, Mr. Allora.
We will be celebrating the victors on New Year's Day in a very special awards ceremony. So vote often, and don't miss the big show on New Year's Day! Polls will be open through December 25th!
Please cast your vote for...
OUTSTANDING PERFORMANCE BY A FLOATING HEAD
OUTSTANDING PERFORMANCE BY A GUEST CHARACTER
OUTSTANDING PANEL OF 2016
OUTSTANDING PERFORMANCE BY A RECURRING CHARACTER
OUTSTANDING STORY OF 2016
Well,that's all the categories for this year. Cast your votes now, and be sure to tune in for the 2016 Worthy Awards on January 1st.
Friday, December 16, 2016
Wednesday, December 14, 2016
I'm so sorry that after voluntarily leaving your 20-year career, you've found gainful employment so quickly. That does sound horrible. I can understand why you are so scared. It would have been much more comfortable to have been fired, and then unable to find new work because you're older than your competition. Unfortunately, you took the easy route of leaving your position, and then had the misfortune of waking up and finding a job offer in your inbox. I don't think I have the meddling experience to advise you. I suggest you visit a priest.
Scared for you,
Tuesday, December 13, 2016
Monday, December 12, 2016
The Actor's Theatre of Greater Metropolitan Santa Royale presents "Iris Tells Mary About Zak."
Friday, December 9, 2016
Thursday, December 8, 2016
Age is just a number that indicates when you were born. People of divergent ages know that their world views and attitudes may be different based on how the culture changed between their births. Age is also a number that indicates potential remaining life span. Couples with 20 years between them need to prepare to see the older person succumb to the effects of age, and should plan to meet those healthcare needs. People who think age differences won't impact their relationships are either old, or write TOTALLY AWESOME COMIC STRIPS!!
Wednesday, December 7, 2016
Tuesday, December 6, 2016
Sunday, December 4, 2016
Friday, December 2, 2016
Thursday, December 1, 2016
I know I'm posting this about 12 hours later than usual, but I couldn't go to bed without celebrating the great example Zak is setting by pursuing an advanced business degree. The A.B.D. is one of the most rigorous programs at Local University, and the fact that he still has time to hit on other people's mothers really speaks to his great intellectual capacity, and his dedication to higher learning. So here's to you, college boy! Thank you for your fine upstanding example.