Monday, August 20, 2018

Mary Worth 2954

Hopefully, when that weight comes crashing back down, they'll both be still so committed to sobriety and accountability that it won't drag them down to the bottom of the beautiful lagoon. And hopefully, when it does, we won't have to watch.

Saturday, August 18, 2018

Mary Worth 2953

And thus we see that love is an eternal circle. Did I say circle? I meant cycle. A cycle of codependency and dysfunction.

Friday, August 17, 2018

Mary Worth 2952

Karen Moy's words say, "And they lived happily ever after." June Brigman's art says, "I'm not so sure about that..."

I miss the days when Joe Giella would just draw a fifth finger or an extra elbow to indicate his frustration.

Thursday, August 16, 2018

Mary Worth 2951

Of course, all of that could change at any moment given the look on Brandy's face. Let's see how things go after Brandy starts taking the bus again.

Wednesday, August 15, 2018

Mary Worth 2950

Brandy is going to have a revelation for him, too: "I will not be the catalyst for your sobriety. If you can't do it for yourself, then you can't do it for me either."

Tuesday, August 14, 2018

Mary Worth 2949

"I also live with my mom and drive you home in her car. I've lost a series of jobs, and I work as a stock boy in a grocery store... oh, wait, you already know that last one."

I was surprised to learn yesterday how many of you actually live in Maine! If I'd known, I would have suggested we take a cruise together or something.

Monday, August 13, 2018

Mary Worth 2948

Tommy has never been in a relationship with a woman long enough for it to reach the abusive stage. Tommy and methamphetamine, however, have quite a lengthy history.

I'm home from vacation, and secret messages will return! Here are some pictures.

Sunday, August 12, 2018

Saturday, August 11, 2018

Mary Worth 2946

Brandy is really good at doing running on the Boardwalk. And she knows all the modern lingo like “Penny for your thoughts.” And she’s considerate enough to explain what it means to Tommy who is not as good at doing running as Brandy and has to sit down to talk. 

Plus, when someone says “Are you breaking up with me?” and pretends to be joking, they are scary insecure. She’s perfect for Tommy who will continue to perpetuate disfunction in her life. 

A perfect match. 

Friday, August 10, 2018

Mary Worth 2945

“We could talk... or we can just read each other’s thought bubbles.”

Thursday, August 9, 2018

Mary Worth 2944


Karen May has created such a complex character - a truly believable addict. He’s over a year sober and still thinking like an addict. He better find a new reason for staying on the straight and narrow or he is headed for the relapse of the century. And none of us wants to see that. Because we’ve seen it already. 

Tuesday, August 7, 2018

Mary Worth 2943

How does he know what the priest looked like?

Tommy’s thinking again. But this time his thoughts are a recap of the priest who recapped what Mary had already said. 

Monday, August 6, 2018

Mary Worth 2942

It’s about time Tommy wrapped this up. 

I’m on vacation this week, so my posts may be a little clunky and erratic. Not unlike this comic strip we all love so much. 

Sunday, August 5, 2018

Mary Worth 2941

Hear that, girls? If you'll just love your man enough, his addictions and secrets will magically all go away. Be the catalyst!

Friday, August 3, 2018

Mary Worth 2940

Holy cannoli! Father Rationalization sure has set the bar pretty low for Tommy. But, to be fair, the priest hasn't heard Tommy's sins yet. Hold on to your cassock, Father, this is going to be good.

Thursday, August 2, 2018

Mary Worth 2939

Seeking advice on love from a priest feels a little like asking a Mormon waiter for wine recommendations.

And if Mary Worth doesn't make you laugh, this definitely will:

Wednesday, August 1, 2018

Mary Worth 2938

And now Father Silhouette knows how we feel. His advantage over Dr. Sweatervest is that the priest can let his eyes droop and Tommy won't know.

Tuesday, July 31, 2018

Mary Worth 2937

"Brandy, I did some terrible things, but I told my priest and now I don't have to tell you."

Monday, July 30, 2018

Mary Worth 2936

I can think of a lot of places I'd rather be than Tommy's confessional booth... I know a cartoon priest who feels the same way.

Sunday, July 29, 2018

Mary Worth 2935

Even Mary is so bored that she calls for her Second and suggests Tommy talk with God.

Saturday, July 28, 2018

Mary Worth 2934

Don't worry, Tommy. Brandy hates drugs, but she hates taking the bus more.

Friday, July 27, 2018

Mary Worth 2933

Just leave out the part about selling tainted meth to her dad, and she'll be fine.

Thursday, July 26, 2018

Mary Worth 2932

"I am aware. And I've been meaning to apologize for the role I played in enabling your most recent opioid addiction."

Wednesday, July 25, 2018

Mary Worth 2931

Tommy is so good at groceries, he can carry them in a bag without a bottom!

Tuesday, July 24, 2018

Mary Worth 2930

This is why I always use petroleum-based plastic grocery bags. They never rip.

Monday, July 23, 2018

Mary Worth 2929

I've been reading Tommy's thoughts all week! Being deep inside his mind has indeed been troubling. It's time to end this Vulcan mind meld!

Sunday, July 22, 2018

Mary Worth 2928

I never took philosophy like Karen Moy or Harlan Jones, but as a layman let me see if I can understand how Nietzsche's comment is relevant here. Clearly, this statement feels cynical. Fear is not a positive emotion, therefore, morality in this sense is the negative result of this negative emotion. When is morality negative? The word 'morality' is only negative when it is merely the appearance of goodness, rather than coming from a sense of love and duty for the welfare of our fellow beings. Can someone be truly moral when they are simply trying to appear as such for the approval of others? So in this context, the quote chosen is in reference to Tommy's desire to appear moral while he is actually keeping secrets about his past from Brandy, which is not moral or ethical.

Now that I have thought about it, I have to give Karen Moy chops for this quote... which is really disappointing because I wanted to make fun of her for it. Because there is simply nothing else in today's entire strip to make fun of!!!

Saturday, July 21, 2018

Mary Worth 2927

If she can respect that haircut, she can love you no matter what your past may be.

Friday, July 20, 2018

Mary Worth 2926

When you break up with someone, Tommy, you have to open your mouth and actually say words. You can't just think it and expect her to read your mind.

Thursday, July 19, 2018

Mary Worth 2925

I'm glad to see them not going out for dinner. For a stock boy and a cashier, they sure eat out a lot! Besides, their dinner conversation was making me lose my appetite.

Wednesday, July 18, 2018

Mary Worth 2924

I'm just thinking... See! I'm doing it now! I'm thinking again.

For those who are interested, the soundtrack of Eddie and the Cruisers can be found on only one jukebox in America. If you want to listen to it, drop another nickel in the nickelodeon at the Pink Ginger Ale Brewery in Santa Royale.

Monday, July 16, 2018

Mary Worth 2923

Tommy is ashamed of much more than just his past.

But he's not so ashamed that he can't ignore his problems. That's his specialty.

Saturday, July 14, 2018

Mary Worth 2922

This relationship is built on a sturdy foundation of past psychological abuse and secrets. IT. ISN'T. DYSFUNCTIONAL. AT ALL.

Friday, July 13, 2018

Thursday, July 12, 2018

Mary Worth 2920

Tommy orders a triple chocolate cake for dessert to go with Brandy's milk tears.

Wednesday, July 11, 2018

Mary Worth 2919

Boy, did I guess wrong. I thought for sure it was Tommy mocking Brandy after she disclosed her father's alcoholism. It made sense that he would because he is, well... Tommy. Even if he isn't a pinball wizard.

Tuesday, July 10, 2018

Mary Worth 2918

"But at least he was home, and never did time in jail for being a pusher. Had he led others down that path, I could never forgive him..."

"Oh, Geez."

Monday, July 9, 2018

Mary Worth 2917

I've eaten at restaurants a few times, actually... at least twelve times. Maybe even more. But I don't ever remember a server saying, "We have some great beers." That being said, it is important for us to remember that Brandy is named after the song, not an alcoholic beverage, because she would make a fine wife, not because she is intoxicated.

I had a wonderful Fourth of July break, but I'm back. The problem has been that Tommy Beedie is back, too, and I just haven't had much motivation to blog about him. I'll give it my best shot this week, but please forgive me if my posts are sparse.

Saturday, June 30, 2018

Sunday, June 24, 2018

Mary Worth 2913

Run, Brandy, run. Run as far and as fast as you can.

Ooohhhh, being near water is great therapy. I thought singing karaoke was great therapy. I've been singing local karaoke twice a week all month and it hasn't worked. I think I'll go near the water instead. At Lookout Point.

Friday, June 22, 2018

Mary Worth 2912

Either Brandy is Scary Desperate, or Tommy has just entered the Friend Zone.

Thursday, June 21, 2018

Mary Worth 2911

After months of anticipation, we finally know if Tommy Beedie approves of his mother's intimate relationship with a 25-year-old. The answer is, yes. He does approve. Maybe a little too much, in that creepy, clueless, Out-of-Touch-Beedie sort of way.

Wednesday, June 20, 2018

Mary Worth 2910

"My mom's the same way. Although I really never see her. She spends all her time with her 22-year-old billionaire boyfriend, riding shotgun in his Ferrari. But other than that, she's just like your mom. Oh, and my mom is alive."

Tuesday, June 19, 2018

Mary Worth 2909

"What was your mom like, Brandy? Did she ever date one of your classmates? Did she catch you selling drugs or abusing opioids? Did she let you live with her after you got out of prison? We have so much in common."