Things got a little hot and heavy on the boat ride with Jeff, and I'm just relieved to see that Mary will be spending the night with her little blue cat toy.
Forgive me if someone has already said something, but I'm gonna put this out here: Those featureless, irregular ovoid bronze earrings that Mary is wearing do nothing for her.
I like the floating Libby head. That's a shoo-in for the "floating head" Worthy award.
Is Mary having second thoughts about getting Libby back, now that Jeff professed his love for her. Libby is a true Jeff repellent for someone as repellent as Jeff.
Bravo, @fauxprof! Thanks for establishing your witty and pithy holiday tradition. And one-sided vow indeed. I doubt Jeff will ever hint at marriage again. He knows his place, especially if he wants free dinners to continue.
So after Mary’s squawks about Libby a couple days ago she gets all misty over a cat toy? Gimme a break, Smug One.
Darn, the boat ride is over. I hoped for a reenactment of A Place in the Sun, with Mary as Shelly Winters and Jeff as Montgomery Clift. After Mary goes over the side Jeff is paralyzed by a mixture of horror and relief.
@fauxprof--Standing Ovation! Terrific, and destined to become a Standard, hopefully replacing Mariah Scarey's wretched noel.
It's obvious that the Pet Adoption Story is going to limp into Xmas. Tone-deaf KM has decided to end it on a strangely sour note, no matter how much Maybelline she piles onto this pig of a plot. True, Libby is presumably happier at Estelle's, but Mary ditched her, crabbing about it at the end.
And for what? Dinner four times a month with Jeff.
After excoriating Libby in front of Jeff, are we supposed to believe that Mary suddenly gets the warm and fuzzies? Not buying it. Also, I can't see Mary picking up a saliva-stained rag that's been in a cat's mouth with her bare hand. She'd break out the designer hazmat suit for that.
But, as we all know, reality isn't really KM's thing.
I honestly wonder why Karen Moy won't be bold and do something radical, such as have Mary's relationship with Dr Jeff Corey become a real romantic relationship. Or have one or the other decide it's not going anywhere. I think it would be awesome to have a storyline featuring Jeff and an attractive younger woman interested in marrying a still good looking doctor.
Hilarious, everyone! fauxprof, I love how you worked "epi pen" into the lyrics. Genius! As for Mary and that mouse, I think it's one of the rare, blue, bug-eyed mice, native to Humboldt County... Mary's thought bubble is really about regretting she let Libby go when there is clearly a need for her services.
I have to say that the last panel is actually kind of tender for me. I still find cat toys in various places, and I get a little thought-bubble of my sweet Dixie. And I think you all are mis-reading Mary's comments on the boat about Libby getting into all sorts of places she wasn't supposed to be. You missed Mary's (invisible) thought bubble saying, "And yet, she was still less annoying than you, Jeff. Maybe I've made the wrong choice."
fauxprof: I always love your witty and literate parodies. I fondly remember your exquisite title song from Nostradamus the Musical (November 27, 2013). Followed by my crude and non-scanning attempts... Additional kudos for using the good old 16th century word ‘pother’. From now on I’ll say pother rather than BFD.
Fauxprof - Absolutely brilliant. It takes a lot to make me laugh, but you did it. Thank you for this gift. Now if I could only re-gift some of your talent and creativity and send it to Karen Moy.
At first I thought maybe we should warn Dr. Jeff not to brave Mary's apartment until she cleans it. But then I realized that is probably Mary's plan all along. No more worries about visit from Dr. Jeff.
Just stop it already. Mary couldn't wait to get rid of that cat.
This is how Mary deludes herself into believing she is such a saint. Yes, she selflessly rescued little Libby and loved her deeply, but then she generously gave her to a poor widow who needed her even more. Because that's what saints do.
You ever hear of that theory that the amoeba in cat poop infects and controls cat owners? Yeah, total malarkey. That said, I'm pretty sure Sunday's Mary Worth has it.
I'm thinking things are't looking to good for Dr. Jeff. I've never seen Mary act like she misses him when he's not around. Has she ever had a Dr. Jeff thought bubble? She's had two Libby thought bubbles in, what, three days?
I had a dream last night that Sunday would be a new plot.
Needless to say, I was deeply disappointed.
Why is Mary pining away for a cat she had for only two weeks?? Is she finally realizing that she rather be a crazy cat lady than Mrs. Dr. Jeff?
If Mary goes back asking Estelle for that feline Mr. Peanut, Estelle should take her to Judge Judy. Let her start giving her platitudes. Judge Judy will clean Mary’s clock but good.
Old socks: faded, threadbare at the heels, with worn-out elastic in the cuffs so they slip when you walk. Chinbeard, you’re in trouble. In tomorrow’s strip, Toby breaks into her rendition of “Santa Baby,” asking for a yacht, a convertible, a ring, and a deed. Maybe she’s dreaming of her own millennial millionaire like Zak....
I know it's too much to hope for anything even remotely racy (or interesting) from Moy but I would love tomorrow's strip to show Prof. Chinbeard flirting with the new, young, blonde Adjunct Professor at wherever the heck it is that he teaches.
I could get irritated that those muffins are in the picture again, but seeing how it's awards season, I'm choosing to think about the possibility of the muffins being nominated "Best Recurring Character". I'm thinking their appearance is a way of lobbying M. Wanders and the Nomination Committee into elevating the humble muffin into the lofty position of Nominee..
MONDAY: old socks aren't necessary comfortable and nice. They are usually worn out, don't stay up, and have holes in them. Or maybe that's what Toby meant?
New thermal socks in the winter? Those are great! Maybe Toby needs some new socks.
Once again, KM has a weird juxtaposition of words. "Comforting like an old pair of socks"? I dunno, I never described being with my husband that way. I would have said "everything's fine" and changed the subject. I suspect that 1) Ian's going to continue his bromance with Hilton Berkes or 2) Dawn has finally come home from 'beautiful Italy" and she be doing yoga with Ian. Hilarity will ensue.
Remember when Toby was all bent out of shape because Ian forgot her greyscale animal exhibition and she hid out at Mary's house and Mary pretended that she wasn't there. Yea, I expect more of that now that Toby's called him an old pair of socks.
Nance, your reference to the "Love Lives" of Charterstone causes me to wander if Mary's pointed inquiry about Toby and Ian is related to her pining more for the Cat Who Got Adopted than for the possibility of losing Jeff to allergy to said cat.. Instead of whipping up muffins, I would expect Mary to be vacuuming and removing cat hair from her apartment with a roll of duck tape in anticipation of Jeff's lamb roast visit. But no, she's muffining...Not about to make Jeff so comfortable she could describe him as an "old sock"...more like an old hair shirt...
Remember the old Ladies’ Home Journal feature, “Can This Marriage Be Saved?” I think Ian and Toby could be good candidates. Especially since the Worthiverse operates in a time zone approximating the 1950s.
I'm guessing that Toby hasn't realized that Ian never returned from his summer seminar or whatever it was. He probably left one of his Astroturf jackets lying on the Barcalounger in his office and she occasionally glances in and thinks that's him.
Mary and Jeff have such a madly romantic and exciting relationship that she feels free to advise Muffin Face Toby. Or in other words, pot, meet kettle.
Regina Wolfe-Parks, I too am baffled by that tiny plate. What purpose would that serve? Crumbs would fall right past it.
Oh, yes, Toby. You and Ian should go on a trip. Nothing ever goes wrong when Worthiverse denizens take a trip. Ask Wilbur about his Italian cruise and his Bogota bombshell. Pax Wellness Center is always nice, as long as you review past interactions. And check with Dawn...oh, right, we haven’t heard from her in months, have we?
Actually, Toby, you did just fine on your cruise with Mary, what with dressing up like an over aged 80s fangirl and all. Why don’t you take Ian this time? He can meet a fascinating entertainer named Esme.
Mary's Muffins are the true star in Worthverse. No character, not even Mary, makes as many appearances. And they've never looked edible, not even once. Has Toby always been portrayed as such an airhead? Surely Karen Moy is intentionally portraying her as stupid. This can't be because she doesn't know how real people talk and act.
Jeff and I are very careful not to get in a rut when we go on our semi-quadrennial dates. Sometimes we don’t go for a cruise before dinner at the Bum Boat. And sometimes I get the shrimp dinner instead if the salmon...sometimes we have a water view, and sometimes we overlook the boardwalk. And we never kiss more often than every four or five years- keeps things fresher than a pair of old sox.
Great comments as always, everyone. TimP, I read that article about people falling off of cruise ships, but it wasn't very well researched. It didn't once mention Esme the Entertainer, or just in general people getting pushed by jealous singers.
Regina, I also was wondering how the plate shrunk from the first panel to the second. I guess it's a magic plate that grows or shrinks to just a wee bit larger than the item that's on it.
I see Mary is still wearing those same blah earrings.
58 comments:
Forgive me if someone has already said something, but I'm gonna put this out here: Those featureless, irregular ovoid bronze earrings that Mary is wearing do nothing for her.
There, I said it.
Since this episode may (emphasize “may”) be nearing the end, I present my annual Carol:
(To the tune of “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer)
Libby the one-eyed kitty
Needed a new foster mom
Mary agreed to take her
With customary blind aplomb
Libby the one-eyed kitty
Had a lot of cattitude
Hopping up on a counter
In cats is not considered rude
Then one festive lamb roast night
Jeff came in and wheezed:
“Your house is now a dander den,
And I forgot my Epi-Pen!”
Mary was in a pother
What on earth would she do now?
Was Jeff really worth the bother
Libby just agreed “Meow.”
Then one day out in the hall
A widowed neighbor smiled.
“Say, would you like a kitty-cat?
Well, here she is, and that is that!”
Victory laps while boating
Jeff makes a one-sided vow.
Libby the one-eyed kitty
Says “Merry Christmas and MEOW!”
Fauxprof, pure genius! I'm still laughing. Bravo!
I like the floating Libby head. That's a shoo-in for the "floating head" Worthy award.
Is Mary having second thoughts about getting Libby back, now that Jeff professed his love for her. Libby is a true Jeff repellent for someone as repellent as Jeff.
Bravo, @fauxprof! Thanks for establishing your witty and pithy holiday tradition. And one-sided vow indeed. I doubt Jeff will ever hint at marriage again. He knows his place, especially if he wants free dinners to continue.
So after Mary’s squawks about Libby a couple days ago she gets all misty over a cat toy? Gimme a break, Smug One.
Darn, the boat ride is over. I hoped for a reenactment of A Place in the Sun, with Mary as Shelly Winters and Jeff as Montgomery Clift. After Mary goes over the side Jeff is paralyzed by a mixture of horror and relief.
Excellent Mary carol fauxprof.
What is in Jeff's thought bubble?
A. Another rejection from Mary
B. Libby - as he almost dies from his allergies
C. Lamb roast
D. His new speedboat
@fauxprof--Standing Ovation! Terrific, and destined to become a Standard, hopefully replacing Mariah Scarey's wretched noel.
It's obvious that the Pet Adoption Story is going to limp into Xmas. Tone-deaf KM has decided to end it on a strangely sour note, no matter how much Maybelline she piles onto this pig of a plot. True, Libby is presumably happier at Estelle's, but Mary ditched her, crabbing about it at the end.
And for what? Dinner four times a month with Jeff.
That's not Libby's play toy. That's an actual mouse Libby caught and left at Mary's door. Mr Allora! We've got an infestation problem!!!
Brava, fauxprof! In fact, bravissima!
After excoriating Libby in front of Jeff, are we supposed to believe that Mary suddenly gets the warm and fuzzies? Not buying it. Also, I can't see Mary picking up a saliva-stained rag that's been in a cat's mouth with her bare hand. She'd break out the designer hazmat suit for that.
But, as we all know, reality isn't really KM's thing.
-- Scottie McW.
If she takes Libby back, once she barfs under the Christmas tree (Like one of my cats did the other day), it's back to Estelle's.
KM, stop beating a dead horse and start a new story, preferably nothing that involves Wilbur.
I honestly wonder why Karen Moy won't be bold and do something radical, such as have Mary's relationship with Dr Jeff Corey become a real romantic relationship. Or have one or the other decide it's not going anywhere.
I think it would be awesome to have a storyline featuring Jeff and an attractive younger woman interested in marrying a still good looking doctor.
Ah, misty water colored memories of the way we were.
Let me add my voice to the chorus of praise for your carol, Fauxprof.
Hey, I can write Christmas carol parodies too, ya know.
Libby got run over by a mower.
Lost her eye and wound up in the pound.
. . . Uh, I guess I can't.
-- S. McW.
So Jeff tells Mary he love her and.....cut to cat toy!
WAKE UP JEFF!
You're deep into the "friend zone" and you'll never get out.
This is painful to watch.
Hilarious, everyone! fauxprof, I love how you worked "epi pen" into the lyrics. Genius! As for Mary and that mouse, I think it's one of the rare, blue, bug-eyed mice, native to Humboldt County... Mary's thought bubble is really about regretting she let Libby go when there is clearly a need for her services.
fauxprof, that was hilarious.
I have to say that the last panel is actually kind of tender for me. I still find cat toys in various places, and I get a little thought-bubble of my sweet Dixie. And I think you all are mis-reading Mary's comments on the boat about Libby getting into all sorts of places she wasn't supposed to be. You missed Mary's (invisible) thought bubble saying, "And yet, she was still less annoying than you, Jeff. Maybe I've made the wrong choice."
fauxprof: I always love your witty and literate parodies. I fondly remember your exquisite title song from Nostradamus the Musical (November 27, 2013). Followed by my crude and non-scanning attempts... Additional kudos for using the good old 16th century word ‘pother’. From now on I’ll say pother rather than BFD.
Fauxprof - Absolutely brilliant. It takes a lot to make me laugh, but you did it. Thank you for this gift. Now if I could only re-gift some of your talent and creativity and send it to Karen Moy.
hmm
At first I thought maybe we should warn Dr. Jeff not to brave Mary's apartment until she cleans it. But then I realized that is probably Mary's plan all along. No more worries about visit from Dr. Jeff.
Saturday
Oh come on, Mary, Libby wasn’t around long enough to take one of your hangnails, let alone your heart.
Just stop it already. Mary couldn't wait to get rid of that cat.
This is how Mary deludes herself into believing she is such a saint. Yes, she selflessly rescued little Libby and loved her deeply, but then she generously gave her to a poor widow who needed her even more. Because that's what saints do.
Give us a break.
-- S. McW.
You ever hear of that theory that the amoeba in cat poop infects and controls cat owners? Yeah, total malarkey. That said, I'm pretty sure Sunday's Mary Worth has it.
SUNDAY
Today's Boldface Haiku is titled
"Libby 1; Dr. Jeff 0".
Home heart...
And yet...
Empty.
Another brilliant title by Nance.
Joe Giella drew this strip for 15 years.
Hey June! How are you holding up?
Ready for another 13 more years of this?
It’s time for Mary to travel to Pax Wellness Center to recover from her Libby heartbreak. The sooner the better, too.
Bingo, Nance!
I'm thinking things are't looking to good for Dr. Jeff. I've never seen Mary act like she misses him when he's not around. Has she ever had a Dr. Jeff thought bubble? She's had two Libby thought bubbles in, what, three days?
@Steve G--
@KitKat--
Thanks for the shout-outs. I feel like if I keep writing haikus, it might hurry this "plotline" along. Sigh.
Goals....
I had a dream last night that Sunday would be a new plot.
Needless to say, I was deeply disappointed.
Why is Mary pining away for a cat she had for only two weeks?? Is she finally realizing that she rather be a crazy cat lady than Mrs. Dr. Jeff?
If Mary goes back asking Estelle for that feline Mr. Peanut, Estelle should take her to Judge Judy. Let her start giving her platitudes. Judge Judy will clean Mary’s clock but good.
10:00 o'clock and she's turning down her bed, then sitting on it - still fully clothed. No wonder her outfits tend to look the same from day to day.
MONDAY
Ian: too socksie for his shirt.
Old socks: faded, threadbare at the heels, with worn-out elastic in the cuffs so they slip when you walk. Chinbeard, you’re in trouble. In tomorrow’s strip, Toby breaks into her rendition of “Santa Baby,” asking for a yacht, a convertible, a ring, and a deed. Maybe she’s dreaming of her own millennial millionaire like Zak....
MONDAY
I know it's too much to hope for anything even remotely racy (or interesting) from Moy but I would love tomorrow's strip to show Prof. Chinbeard flirting with the new, young, blonde Adjunct Professor at wherever the heck it is that he teaches.
Most calendars have the month shown prominently at the top of the grid. Mary's has the year. Make of that what you will.
Muffins? Again with the muffins? Doesn't she ever get tired of muffins?
I feel deprived that I've never had a favorite pair of socks.
Oh well, on to the next mind-numbing storyline.
-- S. McW.
I could get irritated that those muffins are in the picture again, but seeing how it's awards season, I'm choosing to think about the possibility of the muffins being nominated "Best Recurring Character". I'm thinking their appearance is a way of lobbying M. Wanders and the Nomination Committee into elevating the humble muffin into the lofty position of Nominee..
MONDAY: old socks aren't necessary comfortable and nice. They are usually worn out, don't stay up, and have holes in them. Or maybe that's what Toby meant?
New thermal socks in the winter? Those are great! Maybe Toby needs some new socks.
Also, Mary needs to dump Jeff and get a cat.
Once again, KM has a weird juxtaposition of words. "Comforting like an old pair of socks"? I dunno, I never described being with my husband that way. I would have said "everything's fine" and changed the subject. I suspect that 1) Ian's going to continue his bromance with Hilton Berkes or 2) Dawn has finally come home from 'beautiful Italy" and she be doing yoga with Ian. Hilarity will ensue.
Remember when Toby was all bent out of shape because Ian forgot her greyscale animal exhibition and she hid out at Mary's house and Mary pretended that she wasn't there. Yea, I expect more of that now that Toby's called him an old pair of socks.
MONDAY
Today's Boldface Haiku is titled
"Old Socks And Cat Allergies: The Love Lives Of Charterstone".
Power walk?
Great! Brisk walk clear!
Ian? Are?
Fine. Comforting...old socks!
Nance, your reference to the "Love Lives" of Charterstone causes me to wander if Mary's pointed inquiry about Toby and Ian is related to her pining more for the Cat Who Got Adopted
than for the possibility of losing Jeff to allergy to said cat.. Instead of whipping up muffins, I would expect Mary to be vacuuming and removing cat hair from her apartment with a roll of duck tape in anticipation of Jeff's lamb roast visit. But no, she's muffining...Not about to make Jeff so comfortable she could describe him as an "old sock"...more like an old hair shirt...
Remember the old Ladies’ Home Journal feature, “Can This Marriage Be Saved?” I think Ian and Toby could be good candidates. Especially since the Worthiverse operates in a time zone approximating the 1950s.
So, I thought I would share this with folks here:
https://qz.com/1443797/why-do-people-keep-falling-off-cruise-ships-because-people-keep-stepping-onto-them/
Oh, I misunderstood- I thought she said ‘old sex’.
Tuesday: Mary is getting into not "family friendly" territory in panel one.
Since they have "separate interests", they need to go on a trip and be together 24/7, then they'll realize they really hate each other.
I also love the incredible shrinking plate that muffin is on. Where did Mary get that tiny plate? In a toy store that sells dollhouse items?
I'm guessing that Toby hasn't realized that Ian never returned from his summer seminar or whatever it was. He probably left one of his Astroturf jackets lying on the Barcalounger in his office and she occasionally glances in and thinks that's him.
Yeah, you sure wouldn't want to fall into a routine, she says, as she makes muffins for the 3,847th consecutive day.
-- S. McW.
Mary and Jeff have such a madly romantic and exciting relationship that she feels free to advise Muffin Face Toby. Or in other words, pot, meet kettle.
Regina Wolfe-Parks, I too am baffled by that tiny plate. What purpose would that serve? Crumbs would fall right past it.
No more muffins!!!
Oh, yes, Toby. You and Ian should go on a trip. Nothing ever goes wrong when Worthiverse denizens take a trip. Ask Wilbur about his Italian cruise and his Bogota bombshell. Pax Wellness Center is always nice, as long as you review past interactions. And check with Dawn...oh, right, we haven’t heard from her in months, have we?
Actually, Toby, you did just fine on your cruise with Mary, what with dressing up like an over aged 80s fangirl and all. Why don’t you take Ian this time? He can meet a fascinating entertainer named Esme.
Mary's Muffins are the true star in Worthverse. No character, not even Mary, makes as many appearances. And they've never looked edible, not even once.
Has Toby always been portrayed as such an airhead? Surely Karen Moy is intentionally portraying her as stupid. This can't be because she doesn't know how real people talk and act.
Jeff and I are very careful not to get in a rut when we go on our semi-quadrennial dates. Sometimes we don’t go for a cruise before dinner at the Bum Boat. And sometimes I get the shrimp dinner instead if the salmon...sometimes we have a water view, and sometimes we overlook the boardwalk. And we never kiss more often than every four or five years- keeps things fresher than a pair of old sox.
Muffins are the new Chin Napkin.
Wait, I thought Mary talked Toby into going on a cruise with her a while back so Toby could get away from Ian . . .
Great comments as always, everyone. TimP, I read that article about people falling off of cruise ships, but it wasn't very well researched. It didn't once mention Esme the Entertainer, or just in general people getting pushed by jealous singers.
Regina, I also was wondering how the plate shrunk from the first panel to the second. I guess it's a magic plate that grows or shrinks to just a wee bit larger than the item that's on it.
I see Mary is still wearing those same blah earrings.
TUESDAY
Today's Boldface Haiku is titled
"In Which Mary "Knows" Of What She "Speaks"".
"Wearing Favorite Old Socks,"
Trip spice up!
Ha! Worry!
Separate interests...share!
"Comfortable" "Routine"!
...and never on the lips.
Isn’t The Old Familiar the name of a Scotch Whiskey?
Meg, I was thinking the same thing. Who on earth calls their significant other "The Old Familiar?
I think I called this a few days ago. That sure looks like Dawn. She's going to teach him the yoga moves that Harlan taught her in "beautiful Italy."
Wanders, please come home!
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