Friday, July 20, 2012

Mary Worth 1,353

Fortunately the ship's Stunned Captain also has the Unphased Captain, Sunglasses Captain, and Patsy Captain on the bridge to help him cover up his mistake.

Today's Full Strip


fauxprof said...

OMG, that IS Captain Smith of the Titanic on the bridge! Or maybe Theoden, King of Rohan. They look a lot alike.

Those curse symbols seem a little odd. Does that mean that the bad words are in Italian?

Dave in Parma said...

Maybe he's Jill Black's brother (or father)...

KitKat said...

Didn't see WHAT?? Probably not an iceberg, unless this ship is really off course.

As Wanders points out, there is a multitude of captains. How does one translate, "Too many cooks spoil the broth" into Italian? Eh, it's probably too late for that.

I nominate the first panel for a Worthy Panel of the Year. A white-faced sailor and a number of screamers, while Wilbur and Dawn look merely glum.

Nance said...

KitKat--The first panel IS classic! It also contains the Requisite Gondolier--for Italian authenticity--AND it contains a celebrity cameo of...


I wonder if they were compensated, and if so, how much? Perhaps with the free cruise. LOL.

Chester the Dog said...

Shouldn't Dawn be fighting the crowds, trying to get back to her cabin to save her GAME OF THRONES DVD?

@KitKat: What the captain didn't see was this silly plot head his way.

Paul said...

Captain, every reader of "Mary Worth and Me" saw it. We saw it the moment Wilbur suggested the cruise.

Yes, Captain, why DIDN'T you see it?

Limber Joe said...

I'm kind of disappointed that the skipper isn't standing behind a large wooden ships wheel. The "bridge" looks more like a wheel house from one of those old Soviet "fishing trawlers". BTW, I don't often comment, but when I do, it is from Parkman, Ohio (40 miles east of Cleveland).

heydave said...

In my fevered dreams, this is exactly what the captain looked like!

Well, actually, he had a dark goatee, open shirt, hairy chest and lotsa gold bling.

But otherwise, just the same!

heydave said...

@Chester: Dawn does look more than a wee bit on the sedated side for a panicked throng-face, you know?

Jay said...

I want to know who the guy in the tux banging on the window is. And why he's on the floor.

fauxprof said...

That's not a real gondolier in panel one. It's a member of the entertainment staff in costume for the planned show, "An Evening With Gilbert and Sullivan". At least the passengers will be spared that!

Gina said...

I move that we skip the voting this year and just declare "*&^%$! I didn't see it!" the greatest panel of the year. Or possibly of all time.

Anonymous said...

You know, someone really ought to tell the captain about this fabulous new invention that shows ships, islands, UFOs, etc. that might be in the ship's path.

Let me see...what is it called again? It's right on the tip of my tongue...what is it...darn it...oh YEAH! RADAR!!!!

Someone also ought to tell the guy in the tux on the floor that 1. formal nights are never the first night out since people are tired and sometimes don't have their luggage in their cabins yet and 2. the dining room is NOT the same as the bridge.

--Beagle Vet

Anonymous said...

When Dawn returns home: "I'm lucky to be alive! Life is not brutal, life is good. I no longer care about Dave and that tramp he's with now. Where's the remote so that I can get back to GOT."

Anonymous said...

Wilbur couldn't afford to cruise on a ship with radar or enough life boats.

meg said...

With deepest apologies to Gilbert and Sullivan, and a nod to fauxprof- great minds think alike.

When I was a lad I served a term
As chorus costumer in a theatrical firm;
I sewed the shirts with verve and poise,
And I fitted them to the chorus boys.
I fitted each boy in a raspberry-striped tee,
And now I am the Captain of the Unity of the Sea!

As costumer, I was such a success,
They put me in charge of all the fancy dress;
I sewed white suits with golden braids,
And gave the officers Ray-Ban shades.
I dressed up the troup so fancily,
That now I am the Captain of the Unity of the Sea!

In costuming I made such a name
That an assistant producer I soon became;
I wore white shoes and a brand new suit,
And studied at the Fashion Institute.
I passed exams so successfully,
That now I am the Captain of the Unity of the Sea!

As assistant producer I was so hip,
That they offered me a partnership;
That partnership filled me with much awe,
But it was the only ship I ever saw.
I then knew what my future would be--
I'd be the Captain of the Unity of the Sea!

I attended premieres with the fab and rich;
I found favor with the ship-owning niche.
When they asked, can you drive our boats?
I said, I can drive anything that floats.
Although it was a lie, I soon went to sea,
And now I am the captain of the Unity of the Sea!

But steering ships was harder than I thought;
By my lack of training I soon was caught.
I did not know starboard from port
So I'll see all the passengers in court.
I steered the ship so carelessly,
I ran into a reef in the Mediterranean Sea.

Now cruising public you all should know,
The captain is the star of the show;
But when he *&^%$ doesn't see the reef,
You all will wind up with grief.
So choose your cruises more carefully,
And never, never, never book the Unity of the Sea.

Wanders said...

Meg! I LOVE it!!

Thorpnotized said...

I was totally confused by earlier posts that referred to the "guy in the tux", until I re-examined panel two. Darn that Giella, he fooled me once again! It's so obvious that arm with the black sleeve doesn't belong to the captain! (*&^%$! I DIDN'T SEE IT!)

I think the other three captains are actually multiple personalities of the real captain in the foreground. He can blame the accident on one of them...

Mike in Cleveland said...

Meg, you're wonderful. What a wit!

Spell Checker said...

I think you meant to say "unfazed."

Vicki said...

This whole thing reminds me of Dave.

KitKat said...

Meg, applause applause!! I could visualize Captain Whitebeard singing this, with all us MW & Me devotees joining in the chorus.

On another matter, my word verification is NOT family friendly. Heavens to Betsy! (I would share it, but I fear being censored.)

fauxprof said...

Bravissima, Maestra Meg! I'm pleased to have had a nod from you. The Ohio chorus of sisters and cousins and aunts (and brothers and uncles) are ready to burst into song.

jerrybear said...

A ship has only one captain. The helmsman steers the ship. This seems to be a gross failure on part of everyone on the deck.
If someone saw whatever it was, it is that individual's duty to report it immediately.

Anonymous said...

I would like to see Meg's song sung by the Charterstone Choir.

Anonymous said...


Limber Joe said...

See, this is why I don't post very often. Meg. Compared to her prose, I look like a 'possum attempting to use a keyboard...

Anonymous said...

I keep trying to think of 5-letter curse words. The only one I can think of starts with a B. If that's the case, would the Patsy Captain the be B?

Anonymous said...

Meg, brilliant! Is the captain also the very model of a modern cruise ship captain?

--Beagle Vet

Anonymous said...

Oh, the huge manatee! Maybe that's what the ship *&<%$ hit.

--Beagle Vet