Friday, September 14, 2012

Mary Worth 1,406

"Please, help me... I'm being held here against my will. A mad scientist is conducting experimental studies in cyborg technology. I'm a prisoner... Please. Help."

Okay, true story: Last week I contracted poison ivy for the first time in my life. Both my arms are still covered with rashes. However, on Tuesday afternoon my arm started to swell and turn red, and on Wednesday morning, I said to my wife, "I think I need to see the doctor. I don't want to lose my arm." I was joking of course.

But thoughts of Jim circulated in my head.

While I sat in the doctor's waiting room, I read a story about Monte Irvin who played baseball for the New York Giants. When he was a teenager, he developed an infection in his arm, and the doctor was going to remove it, but his mother called on God and his arm was saved, and ultimately, so were the Giants.

When the doctor saw my arm, he gave me some shots and prescribed some medication but told me if it didn't start to get better by the morning, he was going to send me to the ER. "You don't want to lose your arm." He was dead serious.

I was thinking about the NPR story I recently heard about the Olympian archer without any arms.

Trust me... I was up most the night thinking of Monte Irvin and Jim and archery and my arm. I was thinking about how I'd have to wear Velcro shoes, and wouldn't be able to play the ukulele. I was having some long talks with God. But yesterday, I saw the doctor, and while my arm is still a bit swollen, it was doing much better and thanks to God and the wonders of modern medicine, my arm is saved!

Today's Full Strip


Toots McGee said...

Glad you're doing better Wanders.

One question, though. Do you currently play the ukelele?

(Think of the old joke:

A doctor is treating a man's broken arm. The man asks, "Will I ever be able to play the violin again.

The doctor replies, "Sure, I don't see why not."

The man says, "That's interesting . . . I've never been able to play the violin before.")

Vicki said...

That sounds like it was scary; glad your arm is ok, Wanders!

I secretly hope Jim's arm loss is due to the incompetence of Dr. Adrian Corey-Hewlett, M.C. Her correspondence "You Can Be a Doctor!" course didn't have any mention of infections or broad-spectrum antibiotics, etc. There's only so much you can cover in twelve weeks.

I'm so curious to know WHO carefully pins Jim's shirt sleeve up like that?

fauxprof said...

Wanders, please be all better, and soon. You are a bright spot in both the Worthiverse and the Realiverse.

As to poor Jim...Moy has doomed him from the moment he asked Dawn to sit down. Love will blossom, only to be tragically cut short by whatever terminal illness Moy decides to exploit. Dawn,heartbroken again, will finally enter that remote Alpine cloister I suggested a while ago.

Meanwhile, dear Uncle Joe continues to amuse us. Jim's sandwich has reappeared, and now he has Dawn's rice pudding. Dawn has given up on her empenada/pierogi, and now has a sandwich just like Jim's.

heydave said...

Wanders: good news on your recovery process!

Meanwhile, Dawn is going to impress her potential boyfriend by sucking the milk out of her carton without opening it. How you like me now?

wv: vumit... 'nuff said

KitKat said...

Goodness, Wanders, what an anxious experience you had! I'm very glad you are now recovering!

It's been SO LONG since we've seen Detective Scott Hewlett, I had to consult the MW & Me archives to refresh my memory. What a surprise - Jim closely resembles Scott (from Mr. Giella's Big Bag O'Standard-Issue Characters, the Clean-Cut WASP Male). We're in for several weeks of Jim recounting the horrible tale of how he lost his arm. I'm sure it was i the course of something heroic, like rescuing a little blond tyke from a kidnapper.

kathyo said...

If the person you're talking to is sitting across the table from you at the hospital, is it necessary to remind them that you're "at the hospital..."?

birdie said...

I'm glad you're doing better, Wanders. That must have been awful.

I'm just waiting for Jim to say,"Life is brutal!"

I wonder if the genie that popped out of Dawn's milk carton will grant her threee wishes. She could use one of them the make Jim's arm grow back.

Anonymous said...

Wouldn't it be wonderful if Jim popped off a prosthetic leg and beat Dawn senseless with it?

Feel better soon Wanders! You bring us joy every day.

Dave in Parma said...

Wanders, you could learn something from today's panel: pin up your sleeve next time and you won't get poison ivy on your arm. the strip isn't just entertaining; it's educational!

@Kathyo: with the drawing in this strip, it probably is necessary to remind the readers and cast of the Worthiverse what they're looking at/where they are.

phoebes in santa fe said...

Glad you're doing better, Wanders. That must have been scary for you and your family.

Anonymous said...

Wanders - does this mean you are going to start volunteering at your local hospital? Or do you need to go on a Mediterranean cruise first?

Poison ivy is no fun - good to hear you are doing better.

Gina said...

Thank God you're okay, Wanders!

Jim may be missing an arm, but at least he'll still be able to have a career in magic. Look at the way he made that table vanish.

Jane said...

Back when the lights went out in the main salon of the Unita del Mare I swear someone here mentioned flesh eating bacteria as a possible follow-up story... Spooky.

Anonymous said...

Great comments today, everyone!

Wanders, glad your arm is okay.

I'm thinking Jim is ex-military, probably Special Forces, and he lost his arm on a top-secret mission to take out a particularly dangerous terrorist mastermind.

His military experience will be completely useless when he runs into the Meddling Mastermind Who Is Mary Worth, however.

--Beagle Vet

Punky said...

Wanders - scary indeed! And I too have had the experience (nothing quite so dramatic though) of having something going on in my life intersect with a current Mary Worth plot point. It is, as you might suspect, extremely disconcerting.

birdie said...

Good point, Gina.

Poor Jim! First his arm, then the table. Better eat that sandwich fast, before it goes **poof**.

heydave said...

All of which raises the question: Is Jimbo a patient or a experiment?

Dave in Parma said...

A quote from boxer and wordsmith Mike Tyson came to mind as I looked again at yesterday's strip:

"I take my hand off to him."