What a grand night it will be for all the celebs when Dear Old Shelly Cohen steps behind that classy microphone stand and reads her list of people to thank. "The louder I say your name, the more grateful I am for you!"
Banquets at the Waldorf are a cut above. Blond lady is actually ordering from a menu. I assume the 700 other guests will as well. So about the time Shelly finishes reading her list of names, the salad plates will be cleared. Hopefully.
16 comments:
Wow. Dear Old Shelly Cohen is suddenly Dear Adolescent Shelly Cohen! Maybe Marvelo the Magician there did that to her as a special treat!
Tables for 2? At a banquet? Where are all of DOSC's supporters and fans?
It seems the only celeb there is a resurrected Vincent Price. Priceless!
Pink drapes, pink fuzzy flowers - is this actually the Waldorf Astoria Santa Royale?
Instead of being seated at the head table with Promise Haven board members and administrators, Shelly is consigned to the kids' table, with Mary. Very little room for plates of food, too; maybe it will be more of the invisible food they had at lunch.
There's not enough room on that banner for it to read "Promise Haven" . Mary and Shelly have inadvertently wandered into a fundraiser for "Anise Haven", a licorice-addiction rehab center. There is a celebrity in attendance, though. In fact, Mandrake the Magician is the featured speaker.
What a bunch of haters all of you are! I'm so happy for Dear Old Shelly Cohen and Dear Mary! The Waldorf looks lovely, and I hope the jolly handsome bearded man engages one of the lucky ladies in conversation.
I'm just glad that Dear Old Shelly Cohen was able to get time away from her ministry tonight. Too bad she didn't have time to change out of her vestments, but she looks wonderful! And so deserving! Yay, Dear Old Shelly Cohen! Yay, The Haven! Yay, Dear Mary! What a night!
The ONLY way this storyline could come out of its coma at this point, is if Dear Old Shelly Cohen, after all her promises to thank Mary, gets nervous and forgets to do it. Hell hath no fury like Mary Worth unthanked.
@Gina: that would indeed be a twist for the ages!
DOSC approaches the podium and unzips her body mask. The mothball laden vestments fall to the floor. Out pops Undead Zombie Aldo Kelrast.
So glad to see Count Chocula could make it to the ceremony!
No one knows, that off in the wings, an eerily gleeful Elinor Kinley stands poised, holding tightly onto a rope that is tied to a bucket of pig's blood, hoisted high above the rafters. Oh, how Elinor has been waiting to exact her revenge on DOSC since Prom Night, 1952.
Today's secret message was simply outstanding, Wanders.
That has to be the word's dullest gathering- a bunch of white biddies patting themselves on the back for being nice to troubled black kids.
If I hug a black kid, do I get an award too? If I tell someone to do volunteer work, do I later get to be beatified while still (sort of) alive?
It's not so much that Moy doesn't have a life that bothers me. it's that she doesn't even know what one looks like.
I take offense to that statement. Some of my best friends are troubled black kids.
1) Will a robe-wearing accolyte come around to light the two candles on their table? (Is anyone else worried the ladies might catch FIRE?)
Also, who gets to take home the centerpiece? Oh, I do hope the guests have to look under their chairs for a star sticker!! That's always such a fun party game! This banquet is going to be awesome.
I hope the Sunday quote is from a famous master of ceremonies, like Henny Youngman. Take Dear Old Shelly Cohen. Please!
I can't tell if the blonde with the menu has a bird mask on, or she just has her pink turtle-neck pulled up over her chin. And why is Captain Kangaroo sneaking up behind her?
@Maude Findlay - I've had similar premonitions all week! What a spectacular climax that would be!
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