Wednesday, November 27, 2013

Mary Worth 1,731

Ken Kensington sings a song for Mary Worth

Happy Thanksgiving.

Today's Full Strip


Anonymous said...

Call me a fool - I'm loving this! Thanks, Wanders - once again you've made my day. Happy Thanksgiving!

Anonymous said...

Bravo! Bravo! The entire Santa Royale blog community is on its feet!

Nance said...

I was enthralled. There has never been a better use of Ken Kensington's talents. This was wonderful, inspired, and thrilling. I give it four stars; it was better than "CATS!"

Bobby the Soccer Player said...

I'm in agreement with Nance! Happy Thanksgiving!

Chin Napkin Groupie said...

Bravo! If only Moy could be so inspired.

Anonymous said...

My name is Nick. I've been reading MW for about two years now, MW&M for the last year or so. (Hi, Nick!) Today I feel compelled to say that was, simply, inspired. Bravo indeed. Happy Thanksgiving to you, Wanders, and to all of Santa Royale! (I will give $ someday, btw.)

NonnyMus said...

Despite telling me I'm not a wise man*, that was a lovely Thanksgiving gift for us all! Thanks, Wanders!

Happy Thanksgiving, Everyone!!

*As long as you blog about Mary Worth, I'm going to keep reading. Sorry.

Jack Worth said...

Bravo, Bravo, Encore!

Joolz said...

Positively enchanting! Happy Thanksgiving, Wanders!

birdie said...

Bravo, Wanders!

mrvy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
mrvy said...

A shoe-in for a new Worthy Award: best musical performance!

fauxprof said...

Pure genius! Bravo, Wanders, keep on blogging, and I'll keep on reading and commenting. Happy Thanksgiving to you, your family, and all my friends in the Worthiverse.

Sandra Tuckerman said...

Thank you for starting my Thanksgiving with a laugh. I love MM&M, thanks for blogging, I read everyday but never feel witty enough to comment. Happy Thanksgiving!

KitKat said...

Bravissimo, Wanders! That is of Forbidden Broadway quality! I'm thankful to you for this hilarious blog and the entire MW and Me community. Happy Thanksgiving, everyone.

I do feel sorry for poor Shelly Cohen, abandoned by Mary on Thanksgivikkah.

kathyo said...

Standing ovation! Now that Mr. Trololo has passed on, will Ken Kensington come out of retirement to entertain at The Worthy Awards? Happy Thanksgiving to you and all the other Santa Royale Citizens/posters for adding laughter to my mornings all year!

Dave in Parma said...

Thursday: "Why did I leave it all behind? Because I was terrible, and 20 years later people still haven't forgotten."

Happy Thanksgiving all from Dave in Parma and Family. Try to not overdo the platitudes today.

Jack Worth said...

Thursday: Is this going to be like the "I briefly lived on the street" story? Ken will say something like: "Due to my drinking" or "Due to my heroine addiction" and Mary will reply: "Really, that's to bad. Oh look they have tiramisu"

I am thankful this year for finding this wonderful community!

TeacherPatti said...

That was absolutely amazing. Thank you.

Hermite said...

That was grand! Thank you. Happy Thanksgiving to all you delightful posters.

Yahoonski said...

Wow! Just wow! Happy Thanksgiving and an injury-free Black Friday to you, Wanders, and to all you wonderful and witty MW&Mers!

Anonymous said...

I am so thankful for this blog and for your wit and generosity, Wanders, that make it all possible!

Anonymous said...

Legendary! Bravo and thank you. Just a taste of what it must be like to sit around the Wanders family table. A Blessed and Happy Thanksgiving

meg said...

Wanders rocks! (and he can sing, too)

fauxprof said...


Inspired by our brilliant leader, Wanders, I've been thinking about what sort of musical "Nostradamus" might have been. Probably something dark, designed to compete with "Phantom of the Opera". I can just hear K2's big solo, "Music of Foresight":

Softly, subtly,
Prophecies come to me.
Slowly, darkly,
The future passes through me.
I will take great pains
To fashion my quatrains
To obscure my message
Be it dire or bright
As I listen to
The music of foresight.

Of course, you've got to have a big chorus number, with the citizens of 16th century Paris lauding our star, a la "Oklahoma".\:

Noooostradamus!He will tell us what we have in store,
When the comets fly
Across our sky
We'll be hiding
Underneath the floor.

Nooooostradamus! Every night
my chere amie and I
Sit alone and shake
With fear and quake
Over when and how
We're gonna die.

(Well, life wasn't that upbeat for 16th century Parisians.)

meg said...

fauxprof- you get up too darn early!

Nostradamus! The Musical

There was only a shoestring budget for this show- Ken Kensington's star power was never great, and a musical set in 16th century France was always going to be a hard sell. However, the copyright laws were repealed in the early days of the second Dukakis administration, so the producers were able to use the tune of any song they wished, supplying only lyrics.

Additionally, zany director Mel Brooks became fascinated with the similarity of Nostradamus's name to Notre Dame, and decided to have N portrayed as a hunchback. (Political correctness had not yet reared its homely head in the entertainment industry.) This was very much not to Ken Kensington's liking, but he vowed to "act the hump off* this deuced part and win myself the Tony."

And indeed, it was Ken's 'defining role.' It defined him as a portly has-been with limited vocal range and no sex appeal, and as a buffoon singing strange songs while wearing a hump ( and since this was a Mel Brooks production, the hump shifted from one side to the other between acts. And poor Ken was required to say "What Hump?" on several occasions, and when he instructed his apprentices to "Walk this way", well, you know what happened).

As to why he 'left it all behind', that's another story and he'll say the immortal line, 'Let me tell you a story, Mary, a story of Old Broadway.' (Mary- Old Broad-get it? I'm killing myself here.)

At any rate, the show closed after five nights, and Mary's ticket was given to her by DOSC, who recognized a likely flop when she read about it in Dorothy Kilgallen's column. But Mary loved it because she was crushing on Ken Kensington. On that evening, the part of Catherine de Medici was played by Ann Miller.

Mercifully, little information survives about Nostradamus! The Musical, but a few scraps of paper with Mel Brooks' handwriting survive:

Seer (Surrey with the Fringe on Top)

Popes and bishops and nuns you better steer clear
You are now dealing with a notorious seer,
A notorious seer with a hunch on back.

(Has Anybody Here Seen Kelly)

Has anybody here seen Nosty,
Have you seen him see?
His hair is grey and his beard is white,
And his cassock's aw-fly tight.
Has anybody here seen Nosty?
Nosty with the strange ideas!

Heresy (Jealousy)

It isn't heresy, it's just my philosophy.
I expected the Inquisition, but it never came.
Unlike some others, I avoided the Spanish brothers,
Luckily I had just changed my name (from Cohen).

He's an Apothecary ( The Lumberjack Song)

He's an apothecary, and he's okay
He stirs up potions all night and day

I mix up elixirs and the occasional tisane
I go to the li-brar-y,
And when I get a chance I go to a dance
With Catherine de Medici.

Gout! (Shout!)

You know I've got the Gout!
My heels and toes have Gout!
Even my hands have Gout!
Throw my head back and Shout!
Come on now Shout!
Don't forget to say A-ieeeee!
Don't forget to say, ye-ow!
Ye-ow, ye-ow, ye-ow, ye-ow
Say, it hurts!
Say it to me now!
Ye-ow, ye-ow!
Come on, come on
Say, it hurts!
Say it, will-a you-ooooo!
Say Gout Hurts!

Plague! (Mame!)

You took my wife and two kids, Plague!
My nostrums did them no good, Plague!
You got those rats a-breeding
And delivering germs throughout the lands.
The Middle Ages were truly ruined
When you infected all our glands.

*Thanks to Richard Dreyfuss in The Goodbye Girl

Toots McGee said...

I thought perhaps Nostradamus was a stage adaptation of the 1981 film Nostradamus: The Man Who Saw Tomorrow.

There would be a big Man in the Blue Turban production number of course.

fauxprof said...

meg, I worked on my two paltry parodies ALL DAY yesterday, (the pumpkin pie may have suffered for it) but you came up with an entire show! Brava! Think we can get Wanders to put out a CD of our efforts?

I'd been wondering if K2 was intended to be Howard Keel or John Raitt. Today we find that he's Julie Andrews. Except Julie went right on with her acting career when she couldn't sing anymore.

Thorpnotized said...

Mary should have hit Lord and Taylor again today (Black Friday) for some even better deals!

meg said...

no, fauxprof, your verses were exquisitely written and perfectly scanned. My stuff was crude and rude, and I was monitoring a pecan pie!

RJoy said...

I just got around to the Thanksgiving performance. It was SPLENDID! Good job Wanders, good job!

Wanders said...

Hey, I'm glad everyone enjoyed Ken Kensington's Thanksgiving Day Parade performance. And thanks to that iconic musical theatre team Fauxprof & Meg for expanding their repertoire with another instant classic.

Gina said...