"Oh, Jeff, I'm so confused. I don't know what I want anymore. I met the most dashing man who has wooed me relentlessly. We've seen each other every day -- he even bought me a ten dollar scarf! He wants me to stay here in New York City so we can be together. Oh, Jeff, it's so stimulating here, but it would be a big change. It would mean leaving the Bum Boat and the warm Santa Royale winters. But I've never been this happy. Oh, Jeff. I'm so glad you called. What should I do? You've always been such a good friend, I know I can count on you."
2 hours ago