Please don't misconstrue new Take-Charge Toby's leadership for altruism. Once on board, she won't have to worry about missing the boat. And she can use the bathroom. If only she'd thought of that down by the beach.
OMG, Derek is as dumb as a box of rocks!. Instead of retracing his steps and attempt to look for her around the general vicinity they were in, he chooses to stand there with Mary and Toby and wonder where his wife went.Toby sees this as a chance to escape Mary and her non-stop meddling.
Toby: "I'll go back to the ship..." (TRANSLATION: I'm not getting left behind suckers!)Mary/Toby: M= "Do you want me to go with you? T= "No you stay with Derek. He may need you here." (TRANSLATION: "Good God, no, don't ! Please give me a few minutes of peace!")Derek: "I'll go to the beach again." (TRANSLATION: "If Mary is going to be here, I'm going somewhere else, even if it means that the ship may leave without me.")
Derek, on your way back to comb the beach, you will walk right past a restroom. There will probably be a bunch of cruisers massed around it because they want to go potty before the long walk down the walkway to the gangway. Some of them might even be aware of the screams coming from inside of "Let Me Out of This Bathroom!" and "Why is this door locked??!" Just be careful when you walk around this gathering mob to get back to the beach. You don't want to fall off the walkway into the water.
All Derek has to do is walk up to the security checkpoint just inside the ship and ask if his wife has swiped her ID or not. Then he can report that he's alarmed and she may be missing. And why am I bringing up reality and common sense? It's a failing, I'm sorry. Back to the Worthiverse where crazy reigns and Katie will be locked in the toilet for eternity while Derek consoles himself with Triple-E and nicotine.
Today's Boldface Haiku is titled "Welcome To The First Anticlimax: A Series".Back room.With?Stay. Need.Beach. Distracted!
I sense a Three Stooges episode come up. Derek leaves to check the beach, and Mary goes to quickly check the gift shop. Toby comes back to tell them Katie's not in her cabin, but they're not there, so she goes off to look for them. Then Mary returns to the walkway and wonders what's taking Toby so long. So she goes back to the ship to look for Toby. Meanwhile, somebody finally lets Katie out of the outhouse. She doesn't see anyone on the walkway, so she heads for her cabin, only to run into Mary coming back to the walkway. They each explain the situation, and then they split up to go look for Derek and Toby. Just then Derek runs into Entertainer Esme, and . . . well, hilarity ensues.-- S. McW.
@ anonymous -Yes! I hear the Yakety Sax music playing!
Yes, Derek! The key to Katie's mysterious disappearance is that conniving beach.
I am intrigued with the possible "needs" Derek may have for Mary..1. Superior problem-solving skills, 2. Ability to whip up a batch of comfort muffins while standing in line waiting to get on the ship 3. Extensive library of helpful quotations for every occasion. How about "Whatever is supposed to happen will happen."? or "Think positive!"
I've never been on a cruise, nor have I been to Haiti, but I find it highly improbable that a ship that size would be docked at a pier that narrow. No railings either - scary!. Maybe Derek will also become distracted and tumble into the water. Then Mary can dive in and save him, just like she saved Olive. Maybe Evil Entertainer Esme will come by to administer mouth-to-mouth respiration just as the freed Katie comes upon the scene.
@S McW: maybe we could commission some Benny Hill music and speed up the rate of plot as the cast circles through their idiocy
Oh, @Sandi Ego. I see What You Did There.;-)
What exactly is holding this huge ship in place? That rickety plank casually leaning against some open space about 2 feet above the water line? Aren't there ropes or some kind of fastening systems involved? I also want to see sturdy railings. This all feels very unsafe!
She SheShe in bathroom
She taking a crap in restroom.
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