No, Derek, Mary didn't say apologize! She said make Katie understand. You are totally off script right now, and I won't be held responsible.
In our local paper, they run the Dear Abby column in the funnies section, and I (blush) scan it every day. Today she printed a letter from some guy asking if he should keep his safe job or follow his dream and go it alone. To my dismay, Abby did not tell him to make a list of pros and cons. She told him to consult a financial planner. What kind of lame advice is that? Cripes, I could have told him that. What are they paying this woman for?-- Scottie McW.
I wish there was a 3rd panel in which a dripping Esme hauls herself in and shouts, "No, I want to apologize for trying to choke you, Peter Pan Look Alike!"
Of course, it's all Katie's fault for forcing Derek to flirt, smoke, and cheat. Wanders, I love the "apology" - those non-apologies that put the blame on the other person. I'm sorry you took it the wrong way. I'm sorry you misunderstood. I'm sorry you whatever. Then the person gets all miffed and self-righteous when you point out that it wasn't an actual apology.
"Sorry about giving you grief about smoking?" Really KM?"Derek, why don't you take your disgusting smoke breath and inflict yourself on the goddess Esme. I believe she has an interesting story to tell you." Better
"Oh, yes, Derek, and while I'm at it, I apologize for your friend Esme trying to push me overboard, and when she went over herself, I apologize for hesitating before I pulled her back in. I also apologize for shredding all your clothes and throwing your passport off the balcony. And I apologize that you're sleeping in a deck chair for the rest of the cruise. I sure hope that rain has let up. If it hasn't, I apologize that you might get soaking wet."
Why is Derek looking over Kate's shoulder for Toby in her Madonna get-up as he delivers his nopology?
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