Wow, what happened? Estelle went from a complete idiot in love to the most self-confident, mature person I've ever met. Except for my wife. I can't tell you how many times she's said to me, "I can't send you any more money. Call me after you've calmed down."
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Wanders, I expect that Mrs. Wanders doesn't have a one-eyed cat monitoring her 24/7.
Does Estelle have an app for old-timey phone sounds? "Click"; [Busy signal]; "Your call cannot be completed..."
Today's Boldface Haiku is titled
"Estelle's Discovery Of How To Hold Her Phone Has Made Her Both Sensible And Bold".
Can't.
Calmed down!
[Click!]
Mrs. Butterworth's ought to tap into Estelle. She's the country's largest known reservoir of sap.
So what will Arther do now? Will he calm down, call back, and lay on the schmaltz? Or will he stay on the offensive (and I do mean offensive)? Either way, Estelle apparently isn't going anywhere.
-- Scottie McW.
“Call me when you’ve calmed down.” Estelle, are you SERIOUS??!! Ok, sorry, didn’t mean to shout. But the correct response is “I won’t stand for this. We’re done. Never contact me again.” Did she tell her last SilverDaters escort “Call me when you’ve had a bath, changed clothes and developed table manners.”?
Listen Estelle, Artheur is an abuser. Period. His behavior, if he was legit, means instant dismissal. As a conman his behavior also means instant dismissal.
Man, after a weekend where my wife and I had to tell our young children I don't know how many variations on 'calm down', today's strip really hits home.
If everyone just calms down, uses their indoor voices and kind words, then we can all go to the park and Artheur can get his %$*@#*& money... Oh, and Artheur, timeout for saying %$*@#*&.
Like I said previous, Arthur/er is in the yard, putting the tires back on his hooptie, hot wiring it and with that poor, sad dog riding shotgun is going to Estelle's to get his %$*@#*& money. Them tabs for cigarettes and beer don't pay themselves. I can't wait to see Estelle's reaction when her "beautiful man" knocks on the door.
Wow, this Silverdaters should be shut down. From what I've seen, it's full of creeps galore. Like I said, I've done internet dating and you get a few weirdos, but they were nothing in comparison to what Estelle got for her money. The first thing I would do is video chat to make sure they who they said they were. The dating websites now put a disclaimer not to send anyone money. Obviously Estelle didn't read the fine print.
The good news is, Libby has finally stopped smiling.
Smartphones don't go *click* when someone hangs up on you. I do, however have several rotary phones that make a resounding *BANG* when I hang up with righteous indignation.
@Deliliah: If only I could do that with my smartphone. At my job in NY, I broke five phones by slamming the receiver. They wouldn't replace the phones anymore and I wound up bringing one of my own, which I broke as well. Needless to say back then I had an anger management problem. If Arthur/er was dating me and he cursed me the way he did stelle, he would be on the business end of that phone.
As Wanders has reminded us, Artheur knows where she lives. And a lot more. Maybe it's now time for Toby to enter the picture and change all of Estelle's contact information. Cliffhanger: will Estelle learn a lesson or just write down Toby's phone number?
"Call me when you've calmed down" tells us that Estelle hasn't given up on the relationship. Won't we all be surprised when Arthur shows up with roses once he gets paid? Yes we will.
Arther - I won't send you any money but enjoy these 37 pictures of my cat, Libby.
"Ath(e)r's not the man I thought he was!"
No, he's like twice more the man you thought he was, going by body weight, thrice if you factor in the ingrained dirt, dried sweat, dead skin, and pubic lice.
Of course this romance was doomed — aside from the grifting, lying and stealing, the love between Estelle and... Auteur? Sure, why not — nothing so intense could possibly last. The star of that burns twice as bright, etc.
It would be more amusing if Libby said "#^%*$@%!" instead of "MEOW!"
Can we possibly move it along?! After a solid week of Arthu/er cussing at Estelle, are we now going to get a week of Estelle crying to Libby before she invokes the sacred advice of Mary? Will there be days of Mary and Toby tsk'ing over Estelle's reticence to act while Mary overwaters her outdoor plants? Does Bigfoot live in the woods?
Estelle needs to move beyond heart ache to righteous rage about what an abusive idiot her beautiful man turned out to be. And Artheur is pretty much the most incompetent conman ever.
The kids these days use a dating app called OK Cupid. I think Estelle belongs on OK Stupid.
Let me get this straight: Estelle is crying over a man that she's never seen in person, talked only on the telephone with and fell in love with his BS and cornball poetry and stupidly gave him 10K. I just want Mary to tell her "I told you so" and drop a few smug platitudes on her.
Estelle, go over it, put on your big girl panties and go over to Wilbur's apartment and talk about how stupid you both are. Better still, just get in the shower and sing sad country and western songs. A good one would be (and a suggestion for the Charterstone Jukebox) is Patsy Cline's "I Fall to Pieces". (I prefer the Michael Nesmith cover, which is on YouTube with great pedal steel by Orville "Red" Rhodes.)
I wish Libby could talk. She would say "Estelle, you're a dope. I got one eye and I could see this coming from a mile away."
Oh and one more thing: She has a picture of her "beautiful man" that she must have photocopied off the the "Ok Stupid" (thanks Sandi Ego!) website. Who even does that??? Nobody can be this stupid...oh wait, this is Worthverse.
My team of elite cat cryptologists has cracked Libby's code. Today's "MEOW" translates to, "What was your first clue, Sherlock?"
-- S. McW.
Conversation at Chez Estelle:
“I told Arther to cool down and he stopped messaging!”
“Meow.”
“No answer. I suppose he’s just not cooled down yet! I think I’ll just send another message begging him to understand how much I love him!”
“Meow?”
“No answer again! He just disappeared! Like a ghost! Ghosts are people who die and don’t pass on, like suicides! Do you think he committed suicide? Oh no! He must have committed suicide, Libby!”
“Meow.”
“And all because I didn’t give him $5000! I shouldn’t have listened to Mary! I remember now that she forced Aldo Kelrast to his death too! She’s a killer!”
“Meow.”
“Well, there’s nothing else to do for me but to take revenge. I’ll go and stone her to death with these balls of falafel I was keeping for Arther that I just took out of the microwave.”
“Meow.”
“And don’t forget that she foisted you on me, Libby. What I mean is, you’re next.”
“Meow! Meow! Meow!”
Wednesday
Judging by her calendar, Estelle has a lot of time on her hands.
Why is Estelle trying to call Arturo back? What if he hasn't calmed down yet?
Using pot holders to take something out of the microwave? Really?
Estelle seems a little dim, doesn't she? She doesn't have a glimmer of awareness that her beautiful man might be an abuser, if he wasn't an incompetent conman.
Again, we have the cat walking around the kitchen counter where food is being prepared. Who let's this happen?
When you cook something in the microwave, aren't you supposed to cover it so that stuff doesn't spatter everywhere?
There aren't enough life coaches in Southern California to help this ditz.
-- S. McW.
P.S. What phone number does she use to call Arther in Malaysia? Does it have an international code prefix? Or does is have a Missouri area code or something? Isn't there anything suspicious about this? (I don't do smart phones, so I don't know how international cell phone calls work.)
Estelle is definitely looking more haggard. This ordeal is taking its toll on her. Plus she has to make her own muffins.Can't believe Mary hasn't surfaced yet. I am eagerly anticipating her entrance on this woeful scene, mostly because I am starting to think Estelle may need more than scam counseling. A cognitive assessment may be in order at this point.
AAARRRGGHHH!!! I wrote "who let's this happen?" It's "lets," not "let's." How did I lets's this happen?
-- S. McW.
POP CULTURE REFERENCE ALERT!!!
Yes Estelle - it's called "Ghosting".
Suggestion for the Charterstone Juke Box:
"Catfish Blues" - Robert Petway (1941 original)
Scottie -- I did wonder. Call me when you calm down.
Artheur can't answer because he's too busy emptying her bank accounts. I wonder how Estelle will find out. Maybe Mary will come over and tell her the rent is weeks overdue because there was no automatic payment (hmmm....would Estelle know how to do that?). Most likely her bank would sent an alert...but Estelle probably hasn't signed up for that service. Perhaps a representative from the Santa Royale Credit Union will pay Estelle a visit. Oooh...cute meet!
Nice of Brigman to label the packet of cat food, so the readers know Estelle isn’t feeding Libby Splak! or something. Meow.
So who gets fleas first, Estelle or her pussy? Meow?
At this rate Estelle will soon make Arther look good in comparison!
She already makes him look good in comparison as far as basic ability to string two thoughts together is concerned. Meow!
Funny, I gave Wanders a donation several days ago with the promise for him to meet me and now . . . radio silence.
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