Friday, January 8, 2010

Mary Worth 646

Kurt is clearly four or five years younger than Dawn. So why are we all okay with this?

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And I have some sad news for you. According to Edward F. Maroney at the Barnstable Patriot, the Cape Cod Times has cut Mary Worth and five other strips. I can understand jettisoning "The Lockhorns," but Mary Worth? Don't we value good old fashioned meddling anymore? I admit, this current story has gotten a bit risque and sickening, but in general, Mary Worth inspires us to be better people. And it is the funniest strip in the paper.

Today's full strip

19 comments:

tuffenuf said...

Giella gets an "A" in body language. Did we even NEED a caption, Ms. Moy?

liz said...

Shouldn't Kurt be around 40? Based on the hippy-chickedness of his mom, he should have been conceived in 1969.

phoebes in santa fe said...

Aha! Finally, we're all doing the math that Ms Moy wasn't able to do or thought her readers were to stupid to do.

Yes, as Giella draws him, Kurt does seem younger than the 40 year old he should be.

tuffenuff said...

Now don't let the "hippie chick" thing fool you into being too rigid with their timelines. There are plenty of young hippie chicks and dudes living in my town... still.

As for Wilbur's deterioration into the mayonnaise guzzling combover, that one may have taken a while.

Vicki (concerned for Dawn) said...

holy moly, shouldn't someone be calling 911 for Dawn? The poor girl looks like she's having a stroke!

Oh wait, it's Friday. I hear Mountview Hospital's recent budget cuts have necessitated elimination of Friday ambulance runs. Never mind.

duckdg said...

Fall on Your Knees, Kurt - Duckduckgoose

Oh, holy bite! The lures were brightly shining.
He'll fish again with her blonde child, Kurt.
Long lay the man, his chin, his hair, his whining.
'Till joy appeared, dressed in duffle and tee shirt.
The thrill of hope, The weary man rejoices,
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn.
Fall on your knees! In you, he sees your mother!
O bi-ite divine, O cast out, you are reborn.
O bite divine, O bite, O bite divine.

Maude Findlay said...

Why is Dawn's arm horribly deformed. all of a sudden? Kurt had better hope it's not some freakish inherited condition.

Anonymous said...

Wilbur is almost sixty? How old is Dawn? 18? 32? both?

Perhaps the same space/time tidal forces that cause room layouts to jump around and clothing to suddenly change in mid-sentence, is also responsible for the anomalous aging situation?

We need an expert. Who do we call?

Charterstone Physicist said...

Happy to help!

As science now knows, all activity in Santa Royale follows the same mathematical formula:

deltaMw=m(xyz+t)

where xyz represents 3 dimensional space, t equals time, and deltaMw is for changes in Mary Worth's mood.

m, of course, is for 'meddling', which we currently understand to be the 'fifth fundamental force' that overrides the other four (weak, strong, electromagnetic and gravitic).

In layman's terms, time and space in Santa Royale change to suit the ever-shifting meddling needs of Mary Worth. QED.

djangosmom said...

That's right. Dawn should be much younger than Kurt in logical chronology, but that doesn't seem to be so. ??

liz said...

OK, I put on my sleuthing hat and found that on 7-11-2007, Wilbur said to Dawn "You may be only twenty, Dawn,but you are wiser than your years!" which would make Dawn approximately 22.5, assuming, of course, that Mary Worth time is anywhere close to real world time. I still think Kurt should be about 40, because I am 48 and based on Wilbur's looks, I would put him at 5-10 years older than me so Kurt should be 35-40. I also have a college age kid who is "studying science", like Dawn, although his version of "studying science" has a lot more beer drinking than Dawn's seems to have.

Ian said...

Well done duckduckgoose, well done!!!

Chester said...

Vicki: hahahhah!

Or did Dawn just eat the last is the salmon squares left in the freezer?

Wanders said...

So many hilarious comments today. You've made this story even more enjoyable for me.

Thank you all!

maconmemad said...

you go liz...that is all well and good but I think the story developing here is that it is Dawn who is adopted and Kurt is the actual offspring. Don't you see? Kurt loves fishing, Wilbur loves fishing but Dawn, from a foreign gene pool does NOT like fishing. It is SO obvious. And to top it off my word verification is Fishing!

Continental Op said...

Risqué and sickeningly awesome.

katyb said...

@anonymous and chartersone physicist: for crying out loud, just call the Ghostbusters. i'm pretty sure they could deal with "the fifth fundamental force."

Chester the Dog said...

Vicki: Mountview has been closed, due to lack of skilled doctors.

duckdg said...

Where's my poem? Didn't I post one here?