Sunday, May 2, 2010

Mary Worth 742

I think Bonnie speaks for the entire Charterstone residency when she says, "Don't judge me, Mary."

Perhaps it is Mary Worth who truly needs help. Denial ain't a river in Egypt. Here are some more 12-Step quotes that might be helpful to Mary:
  • God save me from myself.
  • When I turned myself over to God, I took my life out of the hands of an idiot.
  • When the world comes to an end, it will do so without my permission.
  • Constructive criticism: I tell you what's wrong with you./Destructive criticism: You tell me what is wrong with me.
  • "I don't need your help today.... Love, God."
  • Expectations are premeditated resentments.
  • The only thing worse than my problems are my solutions to them.
Meddlers Anonymous meets every Monday and Thursday evening at 8 p.m. at the Santa Royale First Methodist Meetinghouse at the intersection of Old Country Road and Ernst Avenue.

Today's Full Strip

27 comments:

lovesmary said...

@Chester, 5/1/10. I think you ARE judging Bonnie! For shame!

I confess that I, too, shop too much. My mother (RIP) taught me to do it -- I now believe because of HER deprived childhood. My solutions the the past few years has been shopping mostly in resale shops and Goodwill/Salvation Army. Now I spend less, give back when I'm tired of things, and can savor the shopping "high". Guess I'd better let Mary know so she can tell Bonnie.

Wanders said...

Thanks for sharing, lovesmary. Acknowledgment is the first step.

lovesmary said...

Did you notice how hard it was for me to confess? I even stuttered.

phoebes in santa fe said...

I think the saying "unsolicited advise is Worth-less" might be true here.

I sure hope poor Bonnie knows that her problems, ranging from her weight/height changes, her shopping "habit", and her run-away husband, will now be endlessly discussed in apartments and laundry rooms all over Charterstone. She'll be the laughing stock of the development.

Poor Bonnie.

Anonymous said...

B?BJ? displays an astonishing amount of insight into her own behavior. That's a big step forward in addressing an addiction.
Seems like this shopahoarder could heal herself without meddlin' Mary.

birdie said...

I'm pretty sure I know where this is going. Mary will suggest volunteer work at the hospital to fill that void. That will give Mary the opportunity train her protoge in the fine art of meddling.
This is important because Mary is slipping a little bit lately. She never got involved in Wilbur's supposed long-lost son's life at all. Obviously she needs help to fully meddle in everyone's life at Charterstone. I think with the right training, B?BJ will be just right for the job of second-string meddler.

mrvy said...

PSA: If shopping for others can provide the same "high," you might see if your local American Red Cross chapter needs shoppers for shut-ins.

I actually hate shopping and do it as little as possible. I need a storyline with solutions and counsel for we who need to eat less and exercise more.

Oh wait, there was "Sandwich Chompin' Wilbur Who Didn't Have a Love Child," from whom I learned nothing. Doubtless because Mary didn't meddle.

Vicki said...

@mrvy: You need only follow Mary's example--eat colorless mush and bowls of unappetizing lumps, always put a vase of pink flowers on your table, and order yourself a matchy-matchy jogging outfit (in purple or yellow, or both) from Blair.

Robert said...

This might lead Mary to suggest Bonnie? get a job as a personal shopper for busy and/or confused customers at Maisie's or Marcy's, thus exploiting her problem and making money on it!

Chester (on the A train) said...

Birdie, if B? does volunteer at Mountview, those poor 5th graders at the front desk will be out of a job.

lovesmary, I am a former stutterer(!) Glad to have it in my past, tho I fall back on it when stressed or lying, or talking about my mother.

In the past year, since the "recession", I have become so frugal, even looking thru the trash cans at my shows to get soda cans to recycle. I don't need the money at all, but the waste of others just eats me. I take the receipts from the can machine and give them to a friend who is unemployed.

Discarded Metrocards are pretty valuable. People leave them near the subway turnstiles, not knowng that the money on them can be combined/added to a new card.

These I pass onto those in need as well. B? should do the same with her ugly shopping choices.

Thats just Chester.

Vicki (with stiff knees) said...

Today (May 3) skirt-wearing Bonnie? and Mary have both plopped down onto the floor to wallow in the misery that is Bonnie's shopahoardic, husband-less life. OH, how I wish this were on video so we could watch the two of them try to get up off the floor! THAT would be a hoot!

trixietrudy said...

Okay, it happened again. Yesterday (Sunday) B?BJ? got noticeably younger and thinner. Today (Monday) she has aged at least 15 years. Couldn't all that time travel mean that Ernie returned on Sunday, saw a much younger and prettier woman i his apartment, and left again, thinking he wasn't at Charterstone but perhaps in Bedrock? OMG, B?BJ? does bear a startling resemblance to Wilma Flintstone on her young and pretty days!

Brick said...

Chester, I applaud your frugality and kindness. Both practices provide an escape from materialism, which appears to have trapped poor Bonnie in an ever-deepening void. Charity (and maybe a few credits on the Marcy's card) could really turn this girl around!

And it's nice to see Mary "getting real" with Bonnie today. Their position on the floor makes all of Bonnie's problems appear lighter somehow, almost buoyant. I read once that everyone has a "set point" for happiness, just as they do for weight. Though Bonnie seems to have been depressed for some time, her weight seems to fluctuate widely. We can hope that her mood offers the same pliability.

Robert said...

How awful that all the furniture is covered in store boxes and clothes, but Mary is gallant enough to plop down on the floor.

pandagrandma said...

Vicki: As one who would also not be able to get back up off of that floor, I wondered the same thing this morning! With Ernie gone, who's gonna pick them up? With bad knees, they might not even be able to crawl to the door to call for help!

Trixietrudy: I am still convinced that Joe sub-contracts out his Sunday strip. The clothing and physical appearance of the characters is always different on Sunday! You'd think the sub would do a little studying up first, though, ya know?

Imogene said...

Clearly both Bonnie and Mary had mothers who did not spend enough time teaching them how a lady properly sits. For example, no matter how limber she may be, a lady wearing a skirt does not sit on the floor with her knees drawn up! I'm just thankful to Giella that he did not make us look at their bloomers or the garter snaps holding up their stockings!

birdie said...

In the first panel of today's strip, Mary looks positively gleeful as she revels in Bonnie's misery.
Is it possible that our dear Mary isn't all goodness and light? Is she joyfully anticipating what good fodder this will be for the next Charterstone pool party? Maybe she should take some pictures so she and Toby can have a good laugh.

Vicki said...

birdie is right--Mary seems to be truly ENJOYING Bonnie's? plight! That definitely looks like a smile on her face in panel one. She's just so nasty-nice; what a witch!
If Bonnie? can get those boots (in panel one)to zip up over her calves (questionable,that) she should put them on right now and give Mary a swift kick right out the door, pie and all! Ha!

Robert said...

Bonnie really has been piling store boxes on top of boxes. There's a Filene's box on the left in today's first panel. Filene's has been out of business for at least a few years now. Does Bonnie ever open the boxes after she's bought the items?

duckdg (laughing too) said...

Bonnie is explaining that she's angry at Ernie for the "hurtful things" he said before he left. How dare he judge her? How dare he malign her horde of boxes and the clothing that's still in them?

"What?! THIS? Mary laughs, "THIS little nuisance?" Gosh Bonnie, everyone has a few annoying quirks.

Anonymous said...

My very favorite recovery quote:

"The only constant in all your failed relationships is you."

--wheelhead

cestr (so close to Chester)

Anonymous said...

With apologies to Jessica Rabbit, "Bonnie? and Mary aren't bad. They're just drawn that way."

Chester (in a skirt) said...

The scene on the floor reminds me of Mrs. Wiggins on Carol Burnett, during their fire drill simulation.

Vicki said...

@Robert -- perhaps it's "Filena's" instead of "Filene's". Rather than a famous Basement Sale, they offer an "Attic Sale" in which they mark things UP each week rather than down. (I read about it in the drug cartel's monthly newsletter.)

Taryn said...

5/5 - "Bonnie! Bonnie! You've reached a crisis point! Get a hold of yourself, woman! Return those teddies to Blictoria's Secret pronto!" Gosh I wish that had been the first panel, followed by Mary slapping Bonnie's face to get her to wake up and smell the coffee.

Man, this storyline is as flat as the months old 2 liter of Coke sitting in my fridge. It had such potential too...

Taryn said...

PS - what happened to the new banner? That thing made me laugh myself sick every time I saw it.

Robert said...

Vicki, ha! Love your comment! And with a shopaholic like Bonnie? in the store, she'd happily pay those Attic prices.