Jill! We thought you'd driven off in a cab, but here you are, back where you belong: With us! And now Mary is going to help you sort this out. It's always best to help someone solve their life's problems while they're totally hammered.Today's Full Strip
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Boozles AND whirlies! Now that's my kind of woman.
The Return of Jill: an early Christmas present! I'm giddy (and whirly) with excitement. Meanwhile, I like the oblivous blue guy waltzing down the street on his cell phone. Doesn't seem like the ordinary kind of street scene in Santa Royale, but I guess his call was very important. Maybe to him a boozed-up broad sitting in the gutter is just another part of the "varied landscape."
I *am* getting a tad confused -- I thought she had gone off in a cab!
Never mind, she's back, and swapped the bottle of ketchup she's been drinking for some soy sauce. No wonder she's so sauced!
Kudos to the Pompous Orange Princes of Policy. Apparently, they thought that taking care of a drunk at a party merely meant to aim her in the direction of a cab and momentum would take over. Time to go back inside and pontificate!
Oh, and don't forget your complimentary bottle, Jill. we give 'em to all the guests!
Everything's just fine, Adrian!
Jill would be arrested on the spot, carrying an open container on the street. Maybe she jumped out of the cab when she realized she dropped her purse in the gutter.
I wonder where Jill found her lovely purple boots? If you look back to the strip of November 29 where we first found her guzzling at the open bar, she wasn't wearing them.
Why did Mary "momentarily leave" the rehearsal dinner? Did she think Jeff and Scott were lying about calling a cab? Or maybe she stepped out the back door to have a smoke?
My theory--I think Mary "took momentary leave" b/c she saw how EASY it was for Jill to squirrel away that expensive bottle of wine!
Mary sneaked one out as well, and was heading for her car in the parking lot! (She stuffed the bottle up inside her dress when everyone was distracted!!)
Now...the truth is... Mary is concerned about her holiday entertainment budget this year. Times are t-i-g-h-t!
That expensive bottle of wine will certainly impress her guests! She rationalizes her thievery by telling herself she "deserves" it b/c she gives advice to everyone all year for "free".
That's gotta be the front runner for panel of the year.
I'm waiting for Jill to break into a chorus of ''How Dry I Am''.
Though the selected panel is a better indicator of Mary's sticking her nose in everyone's business in the interest of being helpful, I am loving the first panel with Jill sitting on the gutter's curb and slurping every last bit of liquor from that bottle. Her impression of Courtney Love is impressive!
I too was wondering why Mary suddenly stepped outside, when she must have thought Jill already left in a cab.
I think Mary doesn't want us to know, but she was pushed out the door after she randomly popped out of the curtains on top of Scott and Adrian as they were trying to share a personal moment. There are limits, even for Mary Worth.
And Scott can't help but notice that Adrian thinks his manly acts of dragging people out of the room are romantic.
Mary's a meddling pro. She laid in wait, knowing Jill would eventually self-destruct in a cloud of squiggly lines and obscenities.
And now, Mary begins the brain-washing procedure. In six months, a blank-eyed Jill will be tiling kitchens with Toby and admiring Adrian's bland taste in everything, and she'll owe it all to that wonderful old crone...
Nothing like a bit of fresh air to revive Mary's meddling magnificence--even though Vicki may have nailed the real reason why Mary "momentarily" left the festivities.
Suddenly Jill has been transformed from a frighteningly violent party pooper to a woe-is-me victim. Who's meddling with whom?
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