I need some advice. I made a list of everything that's in my wallet, and somebody stole my list. I've got a feeling this is going to last forever.Today's Full Strip
I need some advice. I made a list of everything that's in my wallet, and somebody stole my list. I've got a feeling this is going to last forever.
37 comments:
Mary, you have only spent an hour or two cleaning up this mess. We, the readers, are the ones who are suffering because this STORY is lasting forever.
Please do something, anything!
Maybe you can trip and scald Toby with your coffee. Then you can take her to the hospital, get Dr Jeff or Cory back in the plot while pontificating on the importance of having your tetanus vaccine always up to date.
I suppose the remainder of this week will deal with Mary's angst that she cannot do any Black Friday shopping without all her credit cards.
Meanwhile, is that cake only a paperweight or something? We haven't seen Mary and Toby power walking for a loooonnnngggg time!
WV: "rebootel," which is what Moy needs to do with her muse to inject some life into these plodding plots.
Slurp. Finger point. Platitude. Repeat until December. I think Moy set her comic strip on autopilot so she could start her Christmas shopping.
The cake must stay under the glass cover until we are done with our conversation and the cover shall not be lifted until a third pot of coffee is brewed and until the list is reviewed for a second time.
Who provided the cake? Did Toby bring the cake over only to have Mary snatch it away and sequester it under glass? "Now now, dear, we have much hard work to do before we can indulge in cake. Besides, I find that cake is best enjoyed after at least 8 cups of coffee. Now, lets talk about my list of all my credit cards and other personally protected information I keep in my wallet, shall we. Let me get you some coffee."
Did Mary bake the cake? How did she have time to bake a cake when she had so much work to do? The list is more than just a sheet of paper with numbers on it. It's actually in a three ring binder with color coded tabbed dividers, page protectors and a carefully constructed table of contents. It's actually more of a scrapbook.
Maybe Mary ran out to the bakery and bought a cake? I know way too implausable and again, where did she find the time? The list is all consuming, what with all the major revisions that must be done to account numbers and the addition of a new section with credit ratings agencies, fraud reports and a new set of tips about purse hanging do's and don'ts (and think of the revisions to the index)! "Cake, Toby, good grief, how can you think of cake at a time like this! My IBM Selectric will be getting quite a workout today!"
wv:"aluvera" I was distracted by the delicious cake under glass and took a too aggressive sip of hot coffee and scalded myself, so I need to apply some aluvera to soothe the blister forming on my lip.
There is no cake. What is under that glass is another copy of Mary's glorious list.
Moy wants all 6 of her beloved readers to make sure they make a list of the contents of their wallets. And I'm sure they are hard at work on it now. "Let's see...there is one Geritol coupon, cash value 1/20 of a cent, one prepackaged wet wipe, cash value 10 cents...three of my favorite Mary Worth comic strips, cash value...priceless..."
But I have sympathy for Moy because she does not want to convey the message that this list means you can leave your purse dangling merrily from the back of your chair and not suffer consequences if it gets stolen. So she has to show us just how tedious it is to reclaim your identity, even with that precious list.
And she's definitely demonstrated the tedium. If Mary didn't have her platitudes to console her, I don't know how she would get through this. I'm not sure how I'm going to get through it.
I always keep a cake displayed on my living room coffee table. But I have kids, so it makes sense to have cake in the living room.
Look, I feel sorry for Mary, getting her wallet stolen by a couple of crooks. But we, the poor readers of this glacial story, are the real victims here. I hate those crooks.
@ Paul:
calling the pace of this storyline glacial is being generous.
--wheelhead
"digro" - Ms. Moy, I am not impressed, jsut as I was not impressed with previous PSA storylines...why do the elderly resist technology? But I digro...
How much more caffiene can the human body endure? These people at Charterstone are certainly superbeings.
How much more of this non-story must WE endure?
Be like Mary and deliver an updated list to the police on a daily basis. And when delivering the list provide a description of every suspicious looking nogoodnik you saw on the way to the police building. VIGILANCE!
@birdie There is no cake
There must be a cake! There must! There's frosting. Did Mary frost her list?
Okay, it could be ornamental. Like those little hard candies that are made out of glass so they can be displayed in a bowl. It could be a blown glass ornamental cake and won't poor Toby be crushed when she realizes there is no cake.
The coffee is real, right? Can you have an actual three dimensional object that represents the thing that it actually is, can that be next to something that it's pretending to be? Would that be okay?
No one knows "forever" like Karen Moy.
How the heck is Mary handling that coffee-tea pot? I think she put her hands on crooked this morning.
The cake is for me, because today is my birthday!
Elaine, I wondered about that too. I think her hands are shaking from far too much coffee. Moy herself is probably taking caffeine pills to keep her awake for this storyline.
Toots, Mary decorates everything. She is so proud of that list that she made an ornamental version for her coffee table. It's the first thing she shows visitors.
I am hoping and praying that the current shenanigans are just a new bridge towards the next page turner of a story. Because if this "drack" (my VW, how cute!) continues for the typical amount of time, I will drown myself in a giant pot of coffee.
On the other hand, today's artwork is nothing short of gutsplittingly funny. The way Mary wrings out that coffee pot in the fist panel had me bent over double for minutes. And the "cup" Toby holds in panel two is just as hilarious. Well done, team Cut-and-Paste, well done indeed!d
It never occurred to me that Mary would pour coffee from a teapot. That old girl really walks on the wild side, doesn't she? Next thing we know, she'll give her guests forks for finger foods. Salmon squares, anyone?
NEED CHARTERSTONE POOL PARTY.
Yes, the cake is just for show; no one has eaten any. In fact, yesterday there was only half a cake, and today there's just one piece missing. Also, Mary has moved the table; yesterday it was perpendicular to the sofa and today it's parallel.
So how many new wallets do you suppose Mary will receive for Christmas? And someone should get her one of those pretty purse hooks that you can attach to the table. They really work BTW.
Because forever is a mighty long time....
Vigilance? Is Toby subtly proposing Mary become a Vigilante to extract justice?
Just the fact that everyone is more interested in the cake than in the storyline should be a clue as to the lameness...
From the way Mary is holding that teapot, I think it must be filled with Old Crow rather than Earl Grey. If she poured from that angle, it would be splashing on Toby's foot. And yes, there was half a cake yesterday, which tells me that they polished off that one and are making inroads on cake number two.
Hey, I just had one of my email accounts AND a credit card hacked this morning...wish I'd made a darned list! And hadn't kept my purse on the back of my chair, ever. There's one thing Mary hasn't done, which I can now see the need for - she needs her trusty bottle of Excedrin.
And I think that tall bookcase behind Mary is another misfortune waiting to happen. California is earthquake country, you know...
These are, by far, some of the best comments in a while.
I photocopy my credit cards (both sides) and put the copies in my desk drawer.
Mary would not be so foolish do this, because if she used the photocopier at the SR Public Library, some prying eyes (maybe even the staff) may discover the 16 digit number on her "Linens and Stuff" credit card and use it to stock up on Thanksgiving napkins.
No fool, Mary!
The amazing size-morphing coffee cup.
Gotta love it.
You know, and we thought the Bobby Black story was dull... Moy brings us to a new, previously unattained level of dull.
Happy Thanksgiving to all of my MW&me friends. I am thankful for my morning laughs from you all.
For one lousy panel that was full of comedic goodness (the hippies stealing the wallet), this is what we have to endure. This is our punishment.
I remember days long past where the strips yielded so much snark that I would laugh until I couldn't catch my breath.
The Bum Boat is probably what I miss the most, besides Aldo.
Really? I go away for a few days and we're STILL on the list and the implications of ignoring it?
Seriously, what?
"'I'm doing my best...I can only do my best.' But I'm only reading these lines, not writing them."
WV: exedro. Pass the bottle, please.
You mean we aren't going to see Mary's adventures at the DMV, or how disappointed she is with her new driver's license photo?
Comparing Tuesday's strip to today's shows that the toss pillows have changed. Who says there's no action in this strip?!
I'm seconding the wishes expressed by tuffenuf@8:25 AM. Thanks to Wanders and all the witty readers of this blog for making me laugh every day! And, I guess I should thank Moy and Giella, too (although they seem to have become comatose for way too long).
Moy could have made this interesting. She could have had the false Mary Worth get into an accident and end up in the hospital under the assumed name. Dr Jeff rushes in dramatically when he hears his beloved is gravely injured, only to find the phony.
We could then bring in the long-lost detective to clean up the situation. There could even be a shootout at the hospital as her boyfriend tries to remove her from the hospital before she can be arrested.
But no. We get endless coffee and smug jabbering about her list.
Moy is trying to kill us.
It's good to see Mary doing so well in handling the heartbreak of psoriasis...I mean, the heartbreak of petty theft. Afterall, calm is all she knows how to be.
I still think it is funny that neither Mary nor Toby saw anything happen, but a day or two ago, Mary thinks she know which couple lifted her wallet from her purse on the back of her chair.
Mary Worth - Psychic?
meanwhile, down at the eye clinic...
Back when Eddie Murphy was on Saturday Night Live (yes, I am that old), there was skit where he portrayed a young Jerry Lewis with the fake buck teeth and slapstick moves. Another actor (I forget who it was, must be due to age) was dressed as the older, heavier Jerry Lewis and droning on about his telethon. Both images were on the scree at the same time, and the voice over said, "The two faces of Jerry ... which do you hate more?"
That's how I feel. Platitude, self-congratulatory, "made a list" Mary alongside Angry Victim Mary. Which do you hate more?
All hail St. Mary's salmon patties and dipping sauce! Happy Thanksgiving!
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