Recognizing that there is no place for such evil avidity in Santa Royale, Mary Worth uses her preternatural mental powers to quietly levitate the flower vase behind the unsuspecting skull of Nola Wolvenson, where it will soon come crashing down in one spectacular and fatal blow.Today's Full Strip
26 comments:
How's your "benefit of the doubt" doing now, Mary?
It's called evil, kid. [/mst3k]
WV: dumae. As in, "Mary is a dumae if she thinks her powers of meddling can stand in this chick's way."
So, what advice did Nola want? So far, she's just defended her femme fatale motives - and caused Mary to break out in a raging case of touch-face-itis.
if this dinner doesn't end soon, Moy's gonna run out of exclamation points! "!!"
I don't think Nola can be far away from a hearty "MU-AH-HAH-HA!"
aw mary all you did was brag about yourself for two weeks now that someone else is doing it you cant take it.
Mary's chair must be on wheels since she appears to be rolling away from Nola as fast as she can.
LOL at the flower vase comment, Wanders!
--Beagle Vet
With apologies to "Damn Yankees", Whatever Nola wants, Nola gets.
Mary: Nola, let me tell you a story.
Like you, I was once a moral relativist.
Before I was the humble silver tressed paragon of virtue and wisdom Mary (trumpets sound) Worth, I was just the (adorable) little pig-tailed pixie daughter of John and Annette Net. Everything was fine, the Nets were rich, I got everything I wanted, and then along came my (homely and slow) little brother Don. He became the center of attention, so what could I do? I undermined him. As soon as he became toilet-trained, I would squirt water on his bloomers in the laundry room. What fun! Every day, Mother lectured him on the importance of staying dry!
When I went to school, I would steal and conceal the homework of others. Day after day, when little Ambrose or little Agnes were chastised for having failed- I, (brilliant and studious) Mary, basked in the approval of our (old maid) teacher Miss Van Wart
Well, you get the picture- whatever Mary wants, Mary (deservedly) gets.
In college, I was always good for a tumble in a rumble seat. Bring on the bathtub gin, and don't forget the French letters in the pocket of your raccoon coat, Jack! Yes, I met my (unattractive but filthy rich) husband in college. We married, had our son Nethan (Net for short,honoring my parents {wonder whatever happened to those nice people?})
Everything was fine until the Crash of '29.
Jack Worth's net worth plummeted. Fortunately, his life insurance policy was in force when he had the bad reaction to my vegetable terrine.
I lived on alone in my
Park Avenue apartment- Net was away at college or Army or something- haven't seen the dear boy since he asked to borrow some money to pay for his operation. "Sorry, Net, I can't help you, a widow has to look after herself, you know." His widow, Lonette, wrote to me and said that Net always kept my picture prominently displayed in the center of his dart board.
Life in mid-century New York was good for a wealthy widow who practiced moral relativism. I "sponsored" a number of young artists and musicians, at least until they reached their 21st birthdays.
In the early sixties, I came to Santa Royale to house sit for an old "sponsoree", and never left. The warm sunshine gave me more freedom to look for fun. Slowly I noticed that all of my Charterstone neighbors were just like me- wealthy widows doing whatEVER they wanted to. "If it feels good, do it." I'd been there, done that, and wanted to make myself stand out from the (grotesque and common) crowd I found myself in.
So I became a moralizing, meddling, nosy, intefering busybody with an aura of sanctimonious righteousness surrounding me.
And it's been far more fun than I expected. Perhaps you should consider making such a change yourself, dear. I'll be glad to train you. But first, tell me, who did you 'do' at Charterstone? I promise not to tell a soul (except for whoever I want to).
Nola: *&^%$#@! this ^$^@!! ! *&^%$#@! crazy old lady! I'm outta here!
Meg, that was AMAZING! That's a good year's worth of high-quality strips, right there!
After reading the post of Meg @ 12:53 PM, I almost changed my mind about commenting - bravissimo, Meg!
Anyway, after seeing Nola vs. Mary today, I'm expecting something even better than Saruman vs. Gandalf tomorrow. A battle of the ages awaits us (or at least a battle of the aged, since Mary's involved).
wv "moump" - the sound of the vase crashing against Nola's skull, as Wanders has predicted.
@Peggy Olson - just what I've been saying for days. What advice does she want? She is proud that she can get everything she wants and any bad results are not her fault.
@Meg, Great scenario! I'd like to find some archives of the early days. As I remember them (not nearly as interestingly as Meg) Mary had a couple of grandchildren that she cared for. They haven't been heard from for years and would probably be as old as Mary now. That would cramp her style with Dr. Jeff.
Awesome, Meg!! Oh, how I'm loving this nightmarish dinner party! The food is awful, the guest is awful; it's quickly dawning on Mary she has invited a psycopath into her condo, "this is not ambition, it's something else." Well, DUH!
Is it my imagination but what happened to the lamp in the second panel and who moved the vase?
First Nola moved her chair down the side of the table, away from Mary. Now she has moved to the opposite side of the table. But it should be Mary who is moving away from Nola...
Mary's advice to Lola:
"You can't always get what you want.
You can't always get what you want.
You can't always get what you want.
But if you try sometime
you might find
You get what you need."
I'm still not quite sure what this dinner party is all about. Nola asked Mary for advice, but for the past week, all we've seen is her gloating and boasting about how she diddled her friend's husband while Mary turned every color in the book (even vegetable terrine green!), glutched at her chest (as seen today), touched her face, pointed to the sky and turned around in circles.
If this is what we have to look forward to for the next week or two, I say bring back Emily Smith and her platitude-laden parents.
I actually am kind of enjoying watching Mary squirm.
Once she really gets warmed up to give out her platitudinous advice, Nola will be squirming.
Meanwhile, every time I look at that Dr. Seussian concoction of green glop, my stomach squirms.
It's going to be a truly squirmy week, I think.
I think Mary has put too much of her "truth serum" in to the green gloop. Nola, don't stay for coffee, or else you'll be humming "South Pacific" all night long.
My WV: theadjug, where Mary serves her coffee from.
PS Green peas, mashed, are on sale at Kroger this week. Not that that means anything.
I also have been wondering all week, what advice Nola is after. She seems happy about everything she has done. And if there were consequences, then it was someone else's fault and they paid the price, not Nola. Maybe, Nola is dismayed because she can't cook and is seeking advice from Mary regarding her 'mean' Vegetable Terrine.
Marge@357pm- You are right- Mary was once raising her grandchildren. But she put them out of her life- and out of her will- when their mother (dear Net's widow) got remarried to a Green Party activist. Mary said, " the only green party I endorse is one that features my mean terrine."
Okay, Mary has crossed the line! This is a family comic and the last frame In the Sunday strip is not appropriate.
"Having it all does not literally mean 'having it all'" and then holding your hands out like you're measuring something. Just plane rude. I'm writing my congressman.
Having it all doesn't mean actually having it all? Then what's the point?
The next quote should be from Stephen Wright. "You can't have everything. Where would you put it?"
Has Mary even considered that Nola is a narcissistic psychopath? I think she's met her match here, give it up Mary and escape while you can.
wv: cosca, where Mary buys her green glop fixins...
Everybody raise your hand if you think Nola's boyfriend is cheating on her!
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