Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Mary Worth 1,536

Mary, don't you know the meaning of the word BEST? Nothing is better than best! Ipso facto: Nothing is better than you. You just have to accept that.

Today's Full Strip


Thorpnotized said...

I hope we are on our way to a better storyline soon...

KitKat said...

Note that no one has said that Eleanor is in a better place. In fact, Eleanor seems to have been forgotten. I still think she's buried somewhere on the Charterstone grounds.

Isn't it past time for Dr. Jeff to jump out of the shrubbery, shout "Aha, you Jezebel!" at Mary, and punch John Dill?

Yahoonski said...

Oh my. Dilly's back-of-head touch is way more dramatic than a face touch. Or is he about to rip off his Walt Disney/Mr. Whipple mask and reveal that he's actually Dr. Jeff!

fauxprof said...

Too much drama, Dill. You're overacting. Just go, and be a bit more dignified about it.

Anonymous said...

Please John, please go to NY and teach Chef Pierre how to make giant unicorn cakes. I'm ready for a new storyline.

Chin Napkin Groupie said...

If only there were better things ahead for the readers of Mary Worth. I, for one, would much rather read about the adventures of Chin Napkin, although I fear that his reputation has been stained by this inferior material, not to mention the pink dye. Metaphoricaly speaking, like Julie Andrews, he will never sing again.

NonnyMus said...

@Chin Napkin Groupie,

Blasphemy! Chin Napkin is the best textile that ever was... in the Worthiverse and everywhere!!

You could say that Chin Napkin is the best... or even better than the best.

Say, isn't it time for John Dill to start practicing getting on the bus to NYC? Those steps can be tricky and there might be hecklers!

Dave in Parma said...

Maybe John Dill can take Wilbur along with him. Wilbur loves cake (in addition to ham sandwiches), and could write a column for the paper on real life cake drama.

John Dill could use Wilbur for inspiration for his next cake topper, Dionysus.

Mary can go back to her role as sit-it platitude-provider for the 'Ask Wendy' strip. She might even let someone ask a question this time before providing advice.

Sandi Ego said...

It's my birthday and I didn't remember until my husband told me. There is not time to order a pinkcake so I am a bit forlorn. Maybe I'll bake myself one from a mix - it will probably taste better than the Dillworth's anyway. It will be better than the best. Bestest?

meg said...

As everyone knows, I am a very serious person, and I see the sad humanity in this story. Poor John, widowed such a short time ago, was easy pickings for the 'casserole brigade.'

Unfortunately for him, he mistook Mary's patronizing comments as interest in him. He's rebounding from widowerhood, and falls hard for Mary.

Fer gosh sakes, John, Eleanor is barely cold. Put on your big boy boxers and get on with your life. Appreciate the fact that Mary steamrolled you into competing, and you won!

Now get your bad self off to New York, find a little flat on the Upper East Side, go to bingo, attend church, mosque, or synagogue, (your choice), and love will come to you. For every single gentleman of your age, there are a dozen eager widows or divorcees. Be the stud that you are!

Forget about Mary- she's twice your age, involved with Dr. J, probably (ahem), uninterested in lighting up the sky, and has been there, done that in New York.

And John- ix-nay on-way e-thay ink-pay ood-fay oloring-cay.

heydave said...

This dropping of the Dill is going to take longer than making that pink thing, isn't it?

Not the Cake said...

Is Mary growing a beard in the second panel. Has whatever has turned John Dill's cake an unnatural shade of pink now having an effect on Mary's hormonal levels? I'm concerned.

Anonymous said...

Was that real life advice for John Dill? Is it possible that people are being drawn into the Worthiverse to the degree that they are beginning to believe these are real people? Moy, you evil genius. Free the spirits of those you now hold captive.

NonnyMus said...

Mary: "It's a far, far better thing you have done than you have ever done."

John: "But these are the best years of our lives!"

Mary: "Things can only get better."

John: "All the best things in life are free."

Mary: "Things are always better after a good night's sleep."

John: "I did the best I could".

Mary: "Better watch out..."

John: "You're simply the best!"

Mary: "Better than all the rest!"

John: "...Best in show."

Mary: "The better angels of our natures."

John: "Best wrap this up now."

Mary: "You better!!"

Anonymous said...

However, the advertising industry, and the Federal Trade Commission have another definition of "best." Comparable. If you say, we make the "best" cakes, that means to the FTC, that it is in league with others. When you say, Better, you set yourself up as being exclusive, better than anything else. You can get in legal trouble when you use that word, but to be best means only that you are about as good as others! "Good, best, better." Didn't they teach that in Mary's world?