Sunday, July 7, 2013

Mary Worth 1,627

Well, if we've learned anything from Mary Worth and Toby, it's that the Internet is Bad. I think Mary ought to pay a little visit to TripAdvisor.com before she ends up wandering alone in the middle of the Arizona desert. Of course, Trip Advisor is on the Internet, so it's a bit of a conundrum.

Today's Full Strip

9 comments:

meg said...

Well, well, well- there's hope for this story yet. Kudos to birdie for suggesting that Elinor will be Mary's traveling companion. After all, if you're recovering from a heart attack, what better way to give yourself a chance to develop heat-stroke as well? Hike in the peaceful 110 degree desert, get separated from the rest of the group, hallucinate, drink cactus water, get snake-bitten...And of course, Mary will save the day when she uses her bridge-work to signal for help, flashing a SOL (save old ladies) to the search helicopter which is being used at a cost to taxpayers of $10,000 an hour.
When they get back to Santa Royale, Beth and Tom will grit their respective teeth while thanking Mary, then announce that a little Kinley-Harpman is on the way.
ZZZZZZZZ.....

Link3220 said...

@ Meg - First, we could only dream of a story line that exciting from KMoy. Second, a story that complicated would take at least a year of real time to write. Third, the pilot of the helicopter would mistakenly assume the the ladies were signaling the other SOL meaning, and think "eh, they're signaling 'sh** outta luck'. No sense in wasting time trying to save them."

r u ok? said...

At first I thought Mary was going to pay Toby's way - after today's strip it appears Toby would be stuck financing her part of the trip.

Hey Wanders - you want to go to Nashville with me? Sure, you will have to pay your own way, stay in the place that I want to stay in (that I found on the internets from a spam email), do all the things that I want to do, but it will be fun (for me)!

JustSayin' said...

"My husband needs me"--Toby said. Oh puleese...

These characters all talk like robots in bad 1950's sci-fi movies.

There needs to be a nice dog as a permanent resident of Charterstone. Owned by someone other than 'I-give-dogs-away-like-candy' Mary. Then, at long last, might there be at least one life-form in this insipid circus that would actually be likeable.

Maude Findlay said...

Beautiful desert vistas- Desolate stretch of barren wasteland.

Fitness and spirituality classes- Pray that you don't kill yourself on the solitary, extremely rickety exercise bike, located in the non-air conditioned basement they call a ''fitness center''.

Rejuvenating spa treatments- A dollar store version of Noxema slathered on your sunburned face by the same employee that just scrubbed your toilet.

Healthy delicious meals- Mystery glop, cooked by same employee.

fauxprof said...

Mary wouldn't recognize a "healthy, delicious, meal" if it reared back and bit her. They can serve her the same kind of amorphous glop she cooks in her own kitchen, and she would not know the difference.

I just looked up the current temperature in Tuscon. It's 104 degrees. Fine if you live there, I guess.

As to Ian worrying about budget cuts at University, welcome to the club. He must be as faux as I am, I.e., not tenured.

KitKat said...

Toby is holding a mug, while Mary has what seems to be a handle-less cup. In the last panel, steam inexplicably wafts from Toby's mug. What are these women drinking? Or, based on this conversation, maybe the operative question is, "What are these women smoking?"

Harry Kreeshna said...

I hope it turns out to be some whacked out cult commune in the canyons where "spirituality" classes involve walking on hot coals and sweat tents out in the desert. Mary,of course, will set them all straight and put them on the straight and narrow path. She will serve them salmon squares and regale them with stories of how she saved that little girl from Goleta. Oh, and won the cake contest in the Nature Category! Yes, she'll have a wonderful time! Toby really should go.

meg said...

The Pax Wellness Resort received a lot of publicity back in the 70's when Marlon Brando went there to slim down for his role in The Godfather. Paparazzi were waiting when he left: "Hey, Marlon, how did you like the resort?"

"STELLAR! STELLARRRRRRRR!"