Tuesday, October 1, 2013

Mary Worth 1,689

I, for one, never believed for a moment that our new story was going to be an epic tale of redemption centered around Tommy and Iris. It appears my expectations, however, will still be exceeded if this turns into an epic tale about Wilbur typing on the computer.

Today's Full Strip

21 comments:

KitKat said...

Memo to Wilbur: No one wants advice from someone whose thoughts are jumbled.

Peggy Olson said...

Wilbur should un-jumble his thoughts with a lovely day of kite flying. It worked wonders for Dawn.

Mary's expressions have been priceless. She looks concerned, upset and -- even better -- slightly threatening.

Yes, Wilbur. Please take some time for yourself. Your life may depend on it!

Anonymous said...

Yes, Mary.

Whenever someone gets dumped by his girlfriend of 9 years, his first thought is "now I can enjoy all my free time!"

And the same goes for widows and widowers,

Thorpnotized said...

Mary's desperate attempt to change Wilbur's mind seems to have failed. Now SHE will be the one with extra free time to enjoy. Back to volunteering at the hospital with you, Mary!

birdie said...

Didn't Mary just lecture all of us endlessly on the importance of accepting change? Now she is going to be distraught over this insignificant detail of who writes a meaningless and totally unread column?

I think I'll sit this one out. I'm going to go to Toby's and watch paint dry, even if the paint is on horrible clown paintings.

Or maybe I'll drop by Dr. Jeff's and see how he is handling the relationship that isn't.

No thanks, Mary. I really don't need any pie right now. I'll just see myself out...

heydave said...

This "plot" evolution is making me hurt in my head. I may reserve further comments for the seriously crazy stuff.

Chin Napkin Groupie said...

Give up the passive agression, Mary. Change is a bitch and you're out. Get over it.

meg said...

Mary, you fool! The answer to your problem is simple- suggest that Wilbur go to Pax.

Dave in Parma said...

Wilbur: you're a mna. you don't need to stabilize your life by writing a column called "Ask Wendy", or i fear you may get more confused.

As for Tommy living a normal life in Jefferson, methinks given the succession talk in Jefferson, CA that the transition might be a bit turbulent.

http://www.kval.com/politics/State-of-Jefferson-California-county-votes-for-secession-from-state-222537191.html

Nance said...

Trust @Chin Napkin Groupie to put a point on it. Love it.

As Mary and Wilbur poke at their slabs of liver, and we Readers stare in amazement at Mary's French fry hand in Panel Two, KM is doubtlessly pondering a larger question:

KM: They did WHAT at the Costa Concordia?

Anonymous said...

If the point here is to make Mary a less and less likeable (tolerable might be a better word) character, the plan is working perfectly. She was insufferable as a know-it-all meddle-pot but this selfishness is just too, too much.

Sandi Ego said...

Is Tommy all cute and charming like Jessie Pinkman? Please, please, let Tommy live in an RV/Mobile Meth Lab parked in the Charterstone lot. Mary could bring a kelk casserole while Tommy is gone and just, you know, tidy the place up a bit. Borrow some sugar from the little plastic baggie.

meg said...

Please, somebody tell me there is a chance for a Dawn/Tommy romance.
He wouldn't be the first rogue transformed by the love of a good teen girl.

fauxprof said...

Mary: OK, Wilbur, I understand. But I was really honing my writing skills, and I'd like to keep on working for Paper. As you know, I know my way around a kitchen, so perhaps a recipe column...

Wilbur: Well, actually, Mary, Beth Kinley Harpman is writing our food column. People are raving about her recipes for carrot/pork chop mousse and salt-encrusted fish.

Mary: Oh, well, in that case, you know I do power walks, and I took a yoga class at Pax, so perhaps a column about Senior Wellness...

Wilbur: Er--you see, Elinor Kinley has really turned her life around since her heart attack, and she's teaching Yoga and Water Aerobics, and has been writing about it for a couple of weeks, so...

Mary: Oh, that's wonderful. You know, I love to read, and I thought that...

Wilbur: Ian is doing book reviews for us now, and Toby is writing an arts scene recap once a week. Not only that, but the Doctors Corey--all three of them--are collaborating on a health series. Dawn's even contributing a teen angst column called "Life Doesn't Have to Be Brutal".

Mary: Well, if not cooking, why not baking? My kelkies and ghost pie...

Wilbur: Remember John Dill? He's E-mailing a weekly update from New York about baking. It's called "Fifty Shades of Pink", and the editors are very, very excited about it.

Mary: (desperately) You know, I really know how to find a bargain, so maybe a shopping column...

Wilbur: They have someone on that. Her name is Bonnie...Bonnie Johnson? Hey, Mary, what are you doing with that big heavy gray book? Ahhhggggh!!!

Delilah said...

Fauxproof: Brilliant!

Anonymous said...

Fauxprof!! Lol!!

KitKat said...

@Fauxprof, that was inspired! Huzzah!!

Robin in DC said...

@Fauxproof - Very Funny!!!

KitKat said...

Wednesday

Something about Mary's blouse reminds me of the Lone Ranger's shirt.

Just think what will happen to Wilbur if Dawn ever graduates, finds a job, and moves out of the Weston nest! No worries - none of those are likely to happen.

Mary is so distraught by the loss of the column, she's trying to drown herself by simultaneous speaking and drinking.

meg said...

fauxprof, you're killing me! But I warn you, you've not heard the last of this storyline.

meg said...

The government shutdown is great news for Mary Worth. Now that the NSA can't spy on us...Mary is on the case, and she's taking names.