Wednesday, September 2, 2015

Mary Worth 2132

Whaaaaht?? Toby's on her way out the door? I got home yesterday after driving across the country, and I feel like I'm walking into the middle of something. Toby and Ian, splitting up? The only marriage in the Worthiverse that we've actually observed past the wedding day, and this is what happens?

"Dear Ian, we are so done. Love, the woman who stands in front of you for all of our portraits. P.S. Please remember to take Fido's ashes for a walk."


fauxprof said...

If you need further proof that Uncle Joe is messing with us (with a twinkle in his eye), please note the Fido bowl on the bookcase and the ridiculously posed couples portrait of Ian and Toby. Can't you just see it in one of those "together again" newspaper obituaries? At least we now have proof that Ian once owned another sport coat.

Yahoonski said...

You can have pets at The Stone, but only if you've urned them.

KitKat said...

Welcome home, Wanders! I hope you're refreshed and revitalized (although that cross-country drive sounds exhausting), and that picking up in the middle of the Toby-Ian fracas hasn't discombobulated you too much. Good call on Fido Cameron!

Where are the 16 briefcases Toby packed over the previous days? Can she really be abandoning her gray figurines? Is she going to her mother's house?

Nance said...

I cannot believe that there is no Fido statue anywhere.

tkraft said...

Perfect! This sets up the MW spinoff strip, entitled, "Tippecanoe and Toby Too"! Toby returns to her home in Tippecanoe County, IN where she grew up with Uncle Joe and Aunt Kate along with her three sisters, Betty Jo, Bobbie Jo and Billie Jo. (Toby's real name is Toby Jo, didn't ya know?!) They take up residence in the Shady Rest Hotel and hijinks will ensue!

NotARobot said...

Wait a minute... wasn't Ian sleeping on the living room sofa?? And didn't Toby decide to leave him immediately after the last argument?? It seems inconceivable that even a self-centered blowhard like Ian would be able to fall asleep so soundly that quickly so as not to notice his wife stomping through the living room on the way out, suitcases in tow.

And then she's dragging her suitcases back into the bathroom to write the note?? HUH?!?

meg said...

That's not an ashtray or ash urn with FIDO on it. It's actually a drinks coaster given to Ian as a gag gift by his identical twin Angus, and it says DONTMINDIFIDO, cuz that's what Ian always says when Angus offers him a drink. Next up: Angus comes for a visit and the twins play pranks on Hilton Berkes. I can't wait!

Carlye said...

We were just saying the other day, who has regular suitcases anymore? Doesn't everyone have wheelie bags?

Shmoopie said...

Love how Ian photobombed Toby's portrait. What an imp! But why was he wearing a tan-colored blazer?

Dawn Weston's Evil Twin said...

Toby doesn't really want to leave Ian, I can tell. Ian will wake up, and then the two of them will make up, and then we'll all have margaritas by the pool!

On the other hand, Wanders does point out that this is the only couple we've ever seen beyond the wedding day, so maybe Jill Black was right, after all! Wouldn't it be hilarious if Jill Black were to poke her head through the door and say, "Save yourself! Don't believe in lies!"

Matthew McNeil said...

I'm thinking those concrete suitcases weigh about 110 pounds each.

meg said...

Dear Ian:
Do these pants make my butt look big?

Dear Toby:

carlnepa said...

I left a note on his dresser
And my old wedding ring.
With these few good-bye words
How could I sing?
Good-bye old sleepy head.
I'm cashing you in like I said
Take care of everything
I'm leavin' wedding ring.
Don't look for me.
I'll get ahead.
Remember, Darling,
Don't smoke in bed