Sunday, April 30, 2017

Mary Worth 2578


Did I ever tell you about the time I saw Anything Goes? I had a business trip scheduled to New York City that I had to reschedule because of a funeral. I mistakenly scheduled it for my youngest daughter's twelfth birthday. When I realized my stupid mistake, I called my NYC colleague who suggested that I bring her with me and stay at his place. I had also bought a ticket to see Anything Goes on the original trip. The theatre had a really strict no exchanges policy, but when I called and asked if I could change the date and buy three tickets instead of one, the lady said, "I have three together on the front row side or front row center."  I said, "Center."  

The show starred Sutton Foster (goddess) and Joel Grey (legend). And when Ms. Foster opened with "I Get a Kick Out of You," my long time crush was instantly rekindled. Our daughter sat there with a stuffed animal on her lap, and at the curtain call, when Mr. Grey winked at her, I became a complete fangirl, and couldn't stop fangirling. 


Nance said...

Today's Boldface Haiku is titled "We Continue To Invent Gerunds".

Amazing! Amazing! Terrific Esme, stunning!
Uh-huh. Fangirling: remind--wife, too!

Dawn Weston's Evil Twin said...

Mmm-mm, today’s strip is DOUBLE-PLUS-GOOD! What does “fangirling” mean?

Mary’s Helpful Hint #31: If you’re waxing ENTHUSIASTIC about the excellent entertainer on board and your wife tries to HARSH your MELLOW by reminding you that you have a WIFE, bring her BACK to REALITY! Just make DOZENS of detailed comparisons about how she falls short of ESME! That will get her to stop ... off at the next port of call and book a plane home! ... Then you and ESME can have the ship to YOURSELVES!

Duckduck Goose said...

She likes the free fresh wind in her hair
Life without care
I smoke, and it’s oke

I am wild again, beguiled again
A simpering, whimpering child again
You could use some too, I agree

But all I ever wanted... Esme

G H Pangrac said...

I looked back to see if she looked back to see if I looked back at....

Chester the Dog said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Sandi Ego said...

That's a nice memory to have, Wanders!

Peggy Olson said...

Monday: Wow, they're going to Haiti. Coral Reefs! Water Sports! Abject Poverty! Storm-Ravaged Villages!

Will Mary will make new Haitian friends and learn about their plight? Not Likely!

fauxprof said...

I had the identical reaction to our our Peggy Olson and to the Comics Curmudgeon this morning. How tone-deaf can Karen Moy be? She's able to choose any destination in the Caribbean, and she decides on Haiti? The tourist industry does virtually nothing to alleviate the suffering there. I'm sure Mary and Toby will never stick their noses outside the sanitized and highly guarded resort Bargain Cruise Lines has contracted with. What's next? Let's cruise around to the other side of the island and exploit the people of the Dominican Republic.

KitKat said...

Re Sunday, What a lovely memory to treasure, Wanders! By some chance did you see Sutton Foster in The Drowsy Chaperone? I recall you had some connection with someone on the production. Thinking about that delightful show makes me wonder if Esme can roller skate while blindfolded plus do back flips and the splits.

Today: Haiti? What bubble is Karen Moy in?

Regina Wolfe-Parks said...

What a great story Wanders! I am a little jealous. I'd love to see Joel Grey!!! Now I'm your fangirl (or fanboy...Katie's got me confused).

I always thought that if you liked a guy and you're a guy you're fanboy (Example: My husband likes Seattle Seahawks coach Pete Carroll, so I call him Pete Carroll's fanboy) If a guy likes a girl, you're still a fanboy (Another example: My husband has a crush on six time Tony winner Audra McDonald, so I call him Audra's fanboy, NOT FANGIRL.) I'm sorry, I'm reading way into this.

I'm glad I wasn't the only one who had the same thought about Haiti. I was like HAITI? HAITI? Seriously????

Yahoonski said...

Yikes! Did our heroines forget to pack any makeup? Can't wait to find out what Toby's plans are.

Sandi Ego said...

OMG, I've been to Labadee, a sanitized little tourist enclave. I snorkeled there and got the second worst sunburn of my life because my sunscreen wasn't waterproof. As our ship departed that afternoon we could see the campfires dotting the hills...we knew we didn't see the "real" Haiti.
If there's snorkeling, I hope Esme asks Derek to apply sunscreen to her back.
After Labadee, onward to Venezuela!

Nance said...


Holy crap. This cruise is--understandably--aging Toby like crazy. I suggest she start using a super-hydrating moisturizer and look into some spa treatments today.

Today's Boldface Haiku is titled "Cliffhanger!?".

Port destination?
Labadee, Haiti! Tomorrow!
Great! Today?

LouiseF said...

Betting a number of us did a Google search on "Labadee". Apparently Mary and Toby won't be able to leave Labadee even if they want to. The resort is owned by Royal Caribean Cruise Line...I particularly liked the part about how the cruise line changed the name of the resort from LaBadie to "Labadee" to make it easier for English speakers to pronounce....Also, how in January 2016, local Haitians in boats peacefully but noisily blocked the port, in protests against the current Haitian government and upcoming elections, andthe cruise line had to cancel their port stop there. I can just see Mary (with binoculars) looking at the shore and saying to Toby, "Why do you suppose all these natives are coming out to greet us in their boats? How charming!"

Gina said...

It must have been amazing to see Sutton Foster and Joel Grey! Lucky Wanders!

Carlye said...

Here's my favorite definition of fangirling:


v. 1. the reaction a fangirl has to any mention or sighting of the object of her "affection". These reactions include shortness of breath, fainting, highpitched noises, shaking, fierce head shaking as if in the midst of a seizure, wet panties, endless blog posts, etc.

Regina Wolfe-Parks said...

Today's Mary Worth (5/2) makes me think of the immortal quote (allegedly) by Sir Winston Churchill:

“If you were my husband, sir, I’d give you a dose of poison!”

“If I were your husband, I’d take it!”

LouiseF said...

Possible reasons Katie Hoosier is so insecure: 1. She went out and got that short haircut, and her husband doesn't like it. 2.This is her first trip out of Indianna, and she is frightened at being surrounded by water. 3. She would rather go to a towel-folding demonstration than anything Derek wants to do, and she is realizing they have little in common. Enter Mary Worth, just as Katie and Derek begin to quarrel, and Katie goes sobbing down the deck....

fauxprof said...

Katie's problem is that she doesn't know how to leave anything alone. This should build into a nice festering conflict for Mary to wade in and meddle her little heart out. In the meanwhile, I'd love to see the cooking demonstration. I hope it's something like kelk-conch fritters, or Splak coated calimari.

KitKat said...


1. Another appearance by Chin Napkin!

2. What Mary is thinking: "Toby, if you hadn't stuffed your trap with so many pancakes, you wouldn't have so many calories to work off."

3. The Hoosiers' relationship reminds me of the feature "Can This Marriage be Saved?" in the old Ladies Home Journal. A whopping dose of Mary Meddling is just around the corner, er, around the ship.

Nance said...


Today's Boldface Haiku is titled "Katie Never Saw A Sleeping Dog She Wouldn't Kick".

Power walk--calories! You?
Cooking demonstration. Meet.
--Tired, fawning, singer!
Not. Amazing!

Ian Cameron, PhD said...

I've been trying to convince Toby to take up fawning instead of power walking - I hear it's even more tiring than the caber toss and Crossfit combined!

Dawn Weston's Evil Twin said...

Oops, I've been slacking off!

Mary’s Helpful Hint #32 (for MONDAY): To find out the latest about current events and the political situation in various Caribbean nations, read the travel brochure that the cruise activities director gave you! It is sure to have the most up-to-date political and socioeconomic analysis available on board!

Mary’s Helpful Hint #33 (for TUESDAY): For those of you who ENJOY making yourselves MISERABLE, remember to dredge up yesterday’s passive-aggressive conversation points about how MUCH your husband LOVED the lounge singer! It will make you REVEL in your own SELF-PITY! ... Plus, your husband will just think you’re a dork.

Mary’s Helpful Hint #34 (for WEDNESDAY): If your wife’s conversation turns into NAGGING and HARPING about how she’s jealous of that really HOT singer ... and dancer ... and all-around AMAZING talented person ... and beautiful ... and probably NOT a nag ... well, get yourself a fresh CIGARETTE ... and a fresh new travelling companion, too!