Thursday, November 30, 2017

Mary Worth 2757

We have two furry cats. They're brother and sister. The male is orange and named Sundance. The other is Storm, and is a short, grey overweight female. She's tiny, but fat, and looks like a little furball. I'm not a fan of either cat, and they represent major compromises. The agreement was that I don't have to clean up after them. Of course, sometimes I have to when I'm the only one around, but generally, we try to ignore each other. Saturday was my birthday, but because one of my kids was gone, we decided to celebrate on Sunday. Nonetheless, I moped about all day Saturday, feeling like no one cared about my birthday. I can be pathetic like that. That night, I had trouble sleeping, so I got out a book I bought myself as a birthday present, and was reading in the living room at 2:00 AM. As I sat reading, Sundance walked into the middle of the living room and vomited a huge pile of regurgitated cat food. I thought, "Great. The perfect ending to the perfect day." And then Storm came over and ate the vomit.

I share this story because it isn't nearly as sickening as Zak and Iris today.

18 comments:

meg said...

Looks like this is gonna be a two-AAAUGH day for Wilbur.

Anonymous said...


Meg, either that or Tommy walks in on them and goes all AAUUGH!

Then Tommy and Wilbur bang on Mary's door, and when she opens it, they both go AAUUGH!

We can call it Ground-AAUUGH Day!

-- Scottie McW.

Nance said...

Today's Boldface Haiku is titled

"The Borings At Home, Providing Exposition".

Great!
Few...very well!
Away?
Goleta. You, me!

Delilah said...

Happy belated birthday, Wanders! I promise not to puke in your living room.

Regina Wolfe-Parks said...

Thank you Wanders for making me laugh. Happy belated birthday. When you think of how sad your day was, think of Wilbur. Every day is a sad day for him.

Speaking of Wilbur, based on the fact that Tommy's gone for a few days, visiting that little kidnapped girl from Goleta (can't think of her name, too lazy to look) I still predict that Wilbur will knock on Iris' door to surprise her that he's back and Zak is going to answer in HIS Speedos and we will be treated to a second AUUUGH!

Nance said...

And happy belated birthday, Wanders. It was kind of the cats to put on a play for you! Feline Experimental Theatre is so underappreciated.

Chester the Dog said...

Goleta, that hotbed of crime. Of course Tommy is going there...maybe for some "rainbow swirl ice cream", as it is now called on the streets.

Anonymous said...

Time for Iris to say:

"Zak, I need you to buy me something to show me your good intentions!"

Gina said...

Happy belated birthday, Wanders. Some birthdays are tough -- I know it well -- but you got a new book, the cats cleaned up after themselves, and it was an AAUGH-free day, so score it as a win. ;-)

LouiseF said...

Wonder why there are never any pets in the Worthiverse....

fauxprof said...

@LouiseF, before our colleague Chester the Dog, there was a Chester the Dog in the strip. Mary sorta kinda adopted him for a while. I can’t remember what happened to him, but presumably he found a much better forever home than Charterstone. Personally I wouldn’t trust anyone in the Worthiverse with so much as an algae bloom as a pet.

Wanders, a belated happy birthday. At one time we had three cats and a dog (one cat shy of crazy cat lady). My realprof was not a cat person, so of course they adored him. As I am sure Sundance and Storm adore you. They just have a very catly way of showing it.

Shmoopie said...

Well, Zak may have made an astounding amount of money in a very short time, but Iris will have to teach him some manners if he wants to play with the big boys in business. Let's start by easing your death grip on this fine glass of Merlot. You're not guzzling down a can of Bud Light, buddy! And don't even think about burping out loud to show your appreciation of the cook!

Anonymous said...


"It's just you and me, Zak. KnowwhatImean, knowwhatImean? Nudge, nudge, wink, wink. KnowwhatImean, knowwhatImean?"

A broad smile creases Zak's face. "Yes, it's time to play Zakiks. Come on, I'll show you how. It's easy!"

-- S.McW.

Dave in Parma said...

Ah, Goleta. Brings back...memories.

Too bad they didn't print panel 3 where Zak asks if he can borrow Tommy's toothbrush while he's gone.

Have I just blocked it from my mind, or has there been a Dawn/Tommy relationship? He seems like the perfect kind of project for her accept as-is.

Pat P. said...

Happy belated birthday, Wanders! Saturday was my birthday too.

KitKat said...

Thanks for the laugh-out-loud comments, everyone!

Happy belated birthday, Wanders. We have three cats, and vomiting is a not-infrequent event. At least Sundance didn't vomit on your new book. BTW, are you sure Storm isn't a dog?

@Regina Wolfe-Parks at 9:11 a.m., I'm too lazy to check the kidnapped girl's name also. Let's just call her Cindy Lou Who.

Tomorrow: Mary Worth knocks on Iris's door with three dozen Splak seven-layer cookies she just happens to have.

Chester the Dog said...

@LouiseF: There were no pets/or few pets in the Worthiverse before, because Mary had a tough time meddling into their lives without getting bitten or scratched.

r u ok? said...

Wanders - Happy Birthday! And your cats were showing you attention on your birthday by putting on a little show for you. I agree with Nance - you should be thanking them for their flawless and well-rehearsed performance :-)

Did Tommy's friends come pick him up? Did he take a bus? What is he doing there? Do people come back from Goleta?