Well, they'll probably remember that you dumped him when he was poor, but came back when he was rich. They'll call you a gold digger behind your back, which you definitely are. But then, their hearts will soften towards you as they realize you may be the only one who can convince him to stop trying to grow that beard. Not everyone can grow a full beard when they're 22. There's no shame in that. Be patient, and try again in a few more years.
The wedding is where we learn of Zak's serious mommy issues.
23 comments:
"They'll be far too busy taking about how your nose has collapsed to be thinking of anything else! Now tilt your head a little more so I can bite a chunk out of your neck."
Today's "Dear Abby" column includes a letter from a 63-year-old woman who's dating a 31-year-old man. They say they're both in love, "but his family says he doesn't know what love is." Life imitating Worthiverse art?
Coming attractions: Zak's Great Uncle Zig makes a pass at Iris during the Chicken Dance, and wedding crasher Wilbur is outed when he hijacks a tray of appetizers.
Zak said it is his cousin's wedding. He didn't mention that he's the other half of the soon to be betrothed couple. Oops.
Why do I picture Wilbur crashing the reception as a black tired waiter, looking not unlike a penguin, with hijinks ending like a 3 Stooges episode?
KitKat, your "Coming attractions" is hilarious!
-- Scottie McW.
Today's Boldface Haiku is titled "Iris Is From Venus; Zak Is From Duh".
Why?
Relatives...Age difference...
Great...Are!
Scottie McW, thanks!
Nance, your haiku title today is LOL genius! You have captured the essence of Ziris in eight words!
Dave, do you mean "a black, tired waiter" or "a black-tired waiter"? (As opposed to white-walled?)
At first I thought that Iris’ earrings didn’t match. But that’s an optical illusion. It’s her ears that don’t match.
@KitKat--Thank you! It means a great deal coming from someone who imagines MW characters performing The Chicken Dance.
@Dave in Parma, by way of @Yahoonski--Thank heavens for Context showing us your affable intent of black-tied. ;-)
@ Yahoonski & @Nance -- I actually meant 'attired' (i.e. formal wear) though Wilbur does appeared tired, and is clearly tiring as well.
Hopefully by now you all realize that my grammar and spelling clearly suffer when I post from my phone; I am more edjumacated (mis-spelling deliberate this time) than I come across. Checking in to this site keeps me going on the long days though.
My hope is that this will be a gay wedding.
My hope is that this will be a drunken brawl.
Pick guitar, fill fruit jar, and be gay-o
Son of a gun we'll have such fun on the bayou.
Didn't know Zack's surname was Thibodaux or Fontaineaux.
Thursday: wouldn't it be great if as Wilbur approached with the bouquet of roses if Zak reached into his wallet, stuffed a crisp $50 into Wilbur's front pocket, and handed the roses to Iris.
Thursday
1. Eeeouw, Wilbur appears to be wearing the same sickening polo shirt he wore on the ignominious escape from Bogota.
2. Even if there's an emerald ring hidden in those roses, Wilbur's chances with Iris are minuscule.
3. I hope Cousin Pedro is the deejay at the wedding reception, shouting "Step and together! Step and together!"
Thursday: I like how, instead of going to a florist, Wilbur took advantage of Food Mart's special on roses: buy 6, get 2 free.
-hmm
I'd guess Wilbur appropriated the rose from Mary's stash, so perhaps they contain flower fairies.
@Dave in Parma -- that's hilarious!
Here you are, Iris. A dozen roses and one big fat thorn.
-- Scottie McW.
Didn’t Aldo Kelrast stalk Mary with a bouquet of red roses? Dramatic action ahead, hold onto your Maga hats!
@kkitkat: was thinking the same thing about Wilbur and his shirt. If he wants to win Iris back, he needs to change his clothes on a regular basis. Also, has he moved out to the parking lot? He seems to do a 24-7 there watching Iris' and Zak's coming and goings.
Can we all stop to appreciate the pristine perfection that is the text box “in the parking lot...”.
Wilbur, dude, this is not attractive, this...this is creepy. “I know you love flowers Irisssss....”. *shivers*.
Also, you had a chance to get her Irises and blew it. Dumb move.
You just know the floor of his car is littered with old warm fast food wrappers and steamy Iris heads.
Friday: I think we're going to get another "AUUGGH!" moment.
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