Friday, January 26, 2018

Mary Worth 2800

"If you make one million muffins, and I sell them for $1.49 each... well, you do the math!"

14 comments:

KitKat said...

OH MY GOODNESS! What could go wrong? And wait till Mary mentions her pink cakes!

tkraft said...

Look at Ted's square jawline...notice that Dr. Jeff is positioned behind Ted and that he doesn't talk when Ted is talking, nor is he scarfing any of those muffins. See panel 1 on the 24th for further specific evidence. Carefully analyze the frames..."Back and to the Left..." Yes, it's plainly apparent that Ted is a ventriloquist's mannequin and Jeff is playing an elaborate joke on Mary. (Oops, gotta stop this post, I'm actually believing my own conspiracy theory here....)

Nance said...

Today's Boldface Haiku is titled

"Dr. Jeff Is Clearly The Straight Man In This Routine".

Business venture! "Good, gift!"
Salesman.
I can tell.
You! I! Both rich!



(Please tell me that, sometime in July, KM is NOT going to trot out a sort of Lucy-Ethel-esque conveyor belt shtick and hope that Hilarity Ensues.)

Anonymous said...


Three months later:

An exhausted and emaciated Mary collapses on the floor of her filthy living room after another 18-hour day in the kitchen. Concerned, Ted cuts short his sales trip to the Barbados and rushes to her side with a sack of amphetamines to get her back on her feet.

"Suck it up, Mary," he whispers. "We're all counting on you."

-- Scottie McW.

TimP said...

Am I crazy for seeing a resemblance to Paul Newman in Ted?

Anyway, for all of you haters out there, why don't you go on down to your next weekly farmer's market and check out the lifestyle lived by the folks selling homemade baked goods. Why those swells live so high, it's enough to make Robin Leach blush.

Anonymous said...

I wonder how long this hour between the serving of the muffins and the rib roast will last. Wait until Ted sinks his choppers into that rib roast! And I wonder what color it will be!

r u ok? said...

Just wait until Ted tries Mary's rib roast - there will be a second product line for Ted to market and "get rich" from . . .

fauxprof said...

A nursery rhyme from my early childhood oozed into my brain. I think it went, “Oh, do you know the muffin man, the muffin man, the muffin man, do you know the muffin man, who lives in Drury Lane?” To my child mind, he was a dark and shadowy figure, but then, I thought Clarabelle the clown was creepy. Needless to say, I’m not trusting Ted, not one bit.

MissScarlet said...

I’m guessing gray.

Delilah said...

Great secret message today, Wanders!

Yahoonski said...

Make it rich? I've heard "Make it big" and "Get rich," but to me "Make it rich" would mean adding more butter to the batter.

Regina Wolfe-Parks said...

Nance, I'm thinking of the I Love Lucy episode with Aunt Martha's Salad Dressing and Ethel's in the commercial for it as Mary Margaret McMertz. Except instead of hawking salad dressing on TV, Ted (alias Ted Mays a shout out to the late Billy Mays) will be hawking the muffins, known as "Aunt Mary's Old Fashioned Magic Muffins". When it gets too much to handle, Mary, like Lucy will go on the commercial in disguise, saying how lousy they are and that "Aunt Mary's had too many Old Fashioneds" which isn't far from the truth.

BTW Wanders, you mislabeled the tags at the bottom. As much as I'd love to see Ted Confey again, it should be Ted Miller, unless like Ted Miller, you're pulling our leg.

Steve G said...

As obvious on the homepage - Mary and Ted's images are an exact tracing of yesterday's.
I wonder if the artists get paid the same rate - or is KM cutting the budget?

Dawn Weston's Evil Twin said...

Haven't we already seen this plot? Mary and a partner baking themselves into a tizzy. Wasn't it John Dill and his pink cake of pleasure? And didn't that end with him making an inappropriate pass at Mary in front of an impressionable Olive (and her tummy brain)? I can't wait to see what happens next! Bring on the rib roast!